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Post-Match Moyes ? Chelsea

By Tony Cheek :  22/05/2011 :  Comments (6) :
What David Moyes probably said after the game against Chelsea:

"Well, you done me proud lads, beat the Bluecheats with 10 men, and a good performance it was too. Got the ball flowing a bit and in the end could have won by more. As I have always said 4-5-1 is the way to go!"

"Tim, good finish to the season son, if you played like that all season and we would have been in front of the red shite! Did manage to drop one though... Huh! what do you mean you thought we were playing with a size six ball... we always use size five over here lad!"

"Tony, solid game lad, was gonna let you take a pen today; that bleeding Walton, what a tosser! Get your head up, there`s always next season."

"Jags, brilliant again, you and Syl looking good for next season. Should have had that header though."

"Syl, absolutely awesome lad, that Torres bloke didn't get a look-in. Can't believe they paid all that dosh for him. You've got another season in yer, 'aven't you. Bleeding hope so!"

"Bainesy, what a player you are. I apologise about that "second best left back in the country" quote, son. Think we put that one to bed today. Hope Accapello was watching."

"Seamus, dont worry about it son, we all have hot flushes. Was my fault really, should have taken you off after the first yellow. Saw that you were losing it a bit. I never learn do I? Good while you were on though."

"Johnny, great game lad, this is how I like you playing. Getting a leg in everywhere and breaking up their game. But, I did not like you trying to get that Alex bloke sent off! We don`t do things like that at Everton. What do you mean "why not"? It's just not done is it lads... lads? No, you leave that to the Lampards of this world."

"Mikey, shades of old today lad, I liked what I saw. Bit bloody late though, isn`t it? Could have done with a few more performances like that off you this season."

"Jack, still a bit frustrating; you just don`t put a stamp on the game son. I expect much better off you next season... If you are still here!"

"Ossie, great finish to the season lad, some nice touches again and you look real class at times. I just might let you play in the middle again next year."

"Becks, brilliant goal son. Now, I might be wrong here, but I can never ever recall an Everton player getting the ball in his own penalty area and running the whole length of the pitch to score. Think that might be a first! Was really glad to see that go in, thought you could have had two more though. We will make a striker of you yet lad. Won`t have to buy a striker this summer either. Bill will be pleased!"

"Vic, surprised you didn`t get a red card there son, now that would have been good, beating them with NINE men... hmmm!"

"Well, in the end not a bad finish to the season! I think we are all happy with "best of the rest" are we not? I certainly am! Now you can all have a couple of weeks hols, except Becks and Ossie ? shooting training for you two, we are gonna score goals next season!!! Now, pick up your toddlers and go and wave to the fans ? and don't drop him again, Tim!" COYB!!!

Reader Comments (6)

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Tom Harries
1 Posted 22/05/2011 at 22:00:18
"Vic, surprised you didn`t get a red card there son, now that would have been good, beating them with NINE men... hmmm!"

Class!
Albert Perkins
2 Posted 22/05/2011 at 23:34:04
When Vic plays, we are always one man down.
Steve O'Malley
3 Posted 23/05/2011 at 00:11:05
How true Albert, how very very true.
Cheers Tony, always good for ma laugh.
Tom Campbell
4 Posted 23/05/2011 at 05:59:00
I have a sly feeling that Roman will try take Moyesy away? Anyone else feeling the same?
Steve Pugh
5 Posted 23/05/2011 at 07:46:57
Not a chance Tom. DM isn't a big enough name for Chelsea. Guardiola or Van Basten.
Michael Coville
6 Posted 24/05/2011 at 19:01:37
You forgot DM's quote about the board: "OK lads, let's all say a silent prayer for Blue Bill and his side-kicks. If it wasn't for them being broke, half of us would probably not be working here."

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