Season 2011-12
The Mail Bag

Worst Ever Transfer

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Quaking at the rumour of Davey Weir returning to Goodison I began to think about the worst ever transfer deals we've done. Reading a book I saw on the Everton Former Players website ? Everton in the 70s ? I came across Harry Catterick's swap deal of a young David Johnson going to Ipswich in exchange for Rod Belfitt. Not the Cat's finest moment! My Dad says selling Bobby Collins was worse than that but can anyone come up with any worse, either selling or buying.
Cameron  White, Salford     Posted 18/01/2012 at 21:13:42

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Michael Kenrick
796   Posted 19/01/2012 at 01:49:45

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Selling Ross Barkley...

No wait; too soon. Selling Jack Rodwell.

No, er.... selling Joelon Lescott.

And selling Wayne Rooney

And selling Alan Ball

And selling Tommy Lawton
Adam Fenlon
797   Posted 19/01/2012 at 02:33:59

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Theres plenty of players I resent us having paid a penny to or for. Andy Vand Der Meyde, Franny Jeffers (Mk 2) and Alex Nyarko come to mind in recent history.
Tamhas Woods
798   Posted 19/01/2012 at 02:59:31

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I wrote an article last year actually about this:

http://www.footballtransfertavern.com/2010/09/premiership/top-five-worst-modern-day-signings-everton

To those of you who can't be bovvered to read the whole thing, my picks were

5. Simon Davies
4. Ibrahima Bakayoko
3. Andy Van Der Meyde
2. Brett Angell
1. Per Kroldrup
Alex Kociuba
799   Posted 19/01/2012 at 03:04:04

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Abel Xavier, Joe Max Moore, Alex Nyarko, Blomqvist, Linderoth (I almost forgot he even existed), Li Tie, James Beattie.. take your pick!
Roman Sidey
801   Posted 19/01/2012 at 03:45:33

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Yakubu for the price we got for him.
Fellaini for the price we paid for him.
Lescott for the way it was handled.
Dan Parker
803   Posted 19/01/2012 at 04:10:26

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David Ginola, Mark Hughes, Mikel Madar and all above mentioned although I thought Joe Max Moore did ok for a while, wasn't too bad.
Dan Parker
805   Posted 19/01/2012 at 04:12:18

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Richard Wright
Ernie Baywood
806   Posted 19/01/2012 at 04:12:27

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Some of those players were poor but surely for cost, eggs from baskets, and return... it's Bily.

Certainly he's the one that Moyes will be remembered for. Per doesn't even come close - we got our money back didn't we?
Jay Harris
807   Posted 19/01/2012 at 04:16:25

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Has to be Glen Keeley or Earl Barrett.

Keeley was signed from Blackburn, I think, and played half an hour in a derby game game got sent off and was never seen again.

BTW we lost 5-0.

Barrett unfortunately played a lot more than that and was absolute rubbish.
Lee Courtliff
808   Posted 19/01/2012 at 04:26:30

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It's funny to see so many of you choose Nyarko. I remember watching him play in pre-season(away at Preston) when we had just signed him and Gravesen. He looked awesome, like a Veira type player. Anyway, in my opinion, Earl Barret was fucking awful at right back. He should never have taken Matt Jacksons place. And Brett Angel was well out of his depth. At least he was man enough to admit it when he left us though.
Derek Thomas
809   Posted 19/01/2012 at 05:46:34

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The sad thing is you could list 50 going back for 50yrs and 2 other people would come up with 2 different 50's. So lets go with BEST BARGINS EVER...HAVE AT IT.
Jason Lam
812   Posted 19/01/2012 at 06:30:30

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There ends the thread Derek
James Ryan
813   Posted 19/01/2012 at 06:43:27

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Stephen Hughes
Chris Corkhill
814   Posted 19/01/2012 at 06:55:54

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To sell Alan Ball was a crime against Everton Football Club.
Sam Hoare
817   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:16:37

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Van der meyde, must be most disappointing. Remember being so excited when we got him. Ended up putting moyes off wingers for life!

Nyarko on 5 year contract when he only had 4 year work permit was classic too.

Beattie was pretty average for the fee involved.
John Sreet
818   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:28:41

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I agree with you dad, Bobby Collins......totally devastating, and they brought in a guy called Dennis Stevens (I think) to replace him...........
Charlie Percival
819   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:31:10

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To answer this post properly it depends on the Criteria.

For examply I could say Slaven bilic as he only played a handful of games.

1) Are you meaning the number of games played?
2) Are you meaning The transfer fee
3) Are you meaning the transfer fee in relation to the fee we sold for?

etc

etc

etc
Ste Traverse
820   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:31:01

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Simon Davies must be right up there when it comes to bad buys. Over £4m for a player who didn't have a single decent aspect to his game.

He was the last huge whipping boy with the Goodison crowd.

And in my lifetime,selling world class players like Gary Lineker and Wayne Rooney for less than their worth I regard as our worst sales.
Rahman Talib
821   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:49:21

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How about Walter Smith?
Robbie Shields
822   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:45:48

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Claus Thomson

Joe Royle famously said that he was deceptively quick, by which I think he meant, he's so slow it is unbelievable.

Stefan Rehn, Booby Mimms, Mike Milligan, Neil Adams, John Oster, Silva, Thomas Myhre, Niclas Alexanderson.
Trevor Skempton
823   Posted 19/01/2012 at 07:51:11

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John 818...



Dennis Stevens was a key member of a title-winning side. Collins was a great player - and went on to star for Leeds - but bringing in Stevens, although he was never really a crowd favourite, was surely one of Catterick's master-strokes.
Andrew Laird
825   Posted 19/01/2012 at 08:13:45

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Claus Thomsen, signed for nearly £1million scored an own goal in a derby.... absolute shite of the highest order.
Adam Fenlon
827   Posted 19/01/2012 at 08:42:07

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"much to the discretionary of the Everton faithful" - what the bloody hell does that mean?
Dave Lynch
828   Posted 19/01/2012 at 08:59:49

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Worst has to be Bernie Wright.

Best bargain by a mile was Richard Gough.
Neil Pickering
829   Posted 19/01/2012 at 08:57:35

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I remember watching Nyarko and Alexanderson in a pre-season game at Goodison, and they were both amazing!

I remember Alexanderson scoring two, and i thought he was going to be the second coming of Trevor Steven!

Nyarko ran the whole match, and scored a back heel, i remember turning to my mate and saying "he's the new Viera".

How wrong can one person be! They were both the biggest piles of turd i can remember seeing in the flesh play for Everton. Although i would say given the fee we paid, Bily is the biggest waste of cash to ever wear the blue shirt.
Jeremy Benson
830   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:10:28

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Am amazed no-one has mentioned espen baardsen, or alec cleland.



Matt Traynor
831   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:23:01

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Jeremy, #830, perhaps it's because there's only so much shite the human memory can cope with?

John Spencer.
Andrew Ellams
832   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:27:24

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Bit harsh on Neil Adams. He, Kevin Langley and Paul Power came to the club to be bit part players at best and then due to terrible injuries in the first half of the season, they all contributed way more than expected to a title winning season.

Worst ever has to be between Brett Angel, Alec Cleland, Tony Thomas, Carl Tiler and John O'Kane.

Worst non transfer ever was not signing Brian McBride up after his loan spell, although dismissing Demba Ba because of his injury record despite him being a free transfer must push it pretty close.
Mark Murphy
834   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:35:12

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Alan Biley!

So much promise and anticipation then.....

diddley!
Tony J Williams
836   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:40:21

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Ian Wilson ..... even when I type his name, I feel my anger rising.......fucken move will yer, you lazy fucken twat!!!!!
Phil Bellis
837   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:55:41

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Ball to Arsenal
The day the music died
Andy Crooks
838   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:54:24

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Richard Wright.
Danny Broderick
839   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:55:40

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I can't believe no-one has mentioned Billy yet!
Andy Crooks
840   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:57:44

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Also, looking at some of the deals we have done in the past doesn't make David Moyes look too bad at all.
Nick Entwistle
841   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:59:35

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Danny Williams and Sylvester Stallone. Rambo at least got on the pitch.
Dave Roberts
842   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:59:45

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Best bit of business? Buying Alan Ball.

Worst bit of business? Selling him.

Biggest joke? Bernie (The Bolt) Wright. I still feel embarrassed when I think of him.
Paul Johnson
843   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:58:26

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Steve Simonsen. If I am not mistaken it was arecord fee of some sort as well.
Sam Hoare
844   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:04:18

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Simonsen's a good shout almost £4 m i think back in the late 90s and a record fee for a English GK or something like that.

Left on a free...
Ray Roche
846   Posted 19/01/2012 at 09:55:05

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Selling Alan Ball. Even in those days Everton were more concerned about profit then they were about keeping/ making a great side. Lineker falls into the same category.
I won't start on the crap players we've brought in...I don't want to squander what rapidly dwindling time I have left on this planet by inducing terminal depression. I'll leave that to you lot and just scan your conclusions.
I can't imagine anyone with more than a single brain cell attempting to bring Dennis Stevens into this thread. Stevens was a player who would walk into our present team. And they used to say Martin Peters was a player "before his time"...
Chris Fisher
847   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:00:07

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Worst: probably AvdM

As for Bargain, hands down no competition: Tim Cahill.
Dave Roberts
848   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:10:11

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One of the best 'shouts' I ever heard at Goodison was from my Uncle Peter (now long departed) Watching Bernie the Bolt he exlaimed in obvious agony...' If this is the School of Science he's the fucking lab rat!'

It was hilarious at the time anyway!
Derek Williams
852   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:32:21

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No mentions for Geoff Nulty? Bloody hopeless as the midfield player we signed him as. He had a couple of games as sweeper and looked marginally better until Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy S***house Case clattered him, I'm not sure he ever played for us again after that. We've had some dross haven't we?
Stephen Kenny
853   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:36:33

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Watching Mitch Ward(as a very young boy) had me questioning my religion.

Big Nigel must be the best buy of the Moyes era. In My time it's got to be Big Dunc. We'd have had no fans left if we hadn't got him.
Derek Williams
855   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:38:47

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As for the best, bringing Tricky Trevor (£300k), Sheeds (£100k), Reidy (£60k) and Bracey (£850k) together looks like the work of genius. Sigh, nostalgia aint what it used to be
Tony Watson
859   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:54:12

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Worst in:

Carl Tiler
Mitch Ward
Vinnie Samways
Earl Barrett

In fact, virtually anyone we signed in the early 90's!
John Sreet
862   Posted 19/01/2012 at 10:59:18

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Ray Roche, think I have at least two brain cells, the comparison was selling Collins and replacing him with Stevens.......... Jimmy Harris or Derek Temple would walk into the current squad.....what's that go to do with worst transfers......
Sam Hoare
864   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:19:40

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One of my favourite recent buys was mad dog Gravesen...he got us 4th place singlehandedly and was somehow always much better than he looked..or much worse...could never figure it out.
Tony Watson
866   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:24:49

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Derek Williams (#855) - Re: Sheeds £100K

£100K for possibly the finest player to ever pull on the blue jersey seems truly unbelievable.
Craig Walker
867   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:23:05

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John O' Kane
Alec Cleland
John Oster
John Spencer
Simon Davies

Terry Phelan
Mitch Ward
Carl Tiler

Marc Hottiger

Claus Thomsen

Alex Nyarko
Paul Gerrard
Danny Burke
868   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:25:24

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Alec Cleland
Bret Angell
Tony Thomas
The Earl of Barrett (Ryan Giggs once said he was one of his most difficult opponents????)
Mitch Ward
Carl Tiler
John Oster
Eddy Bosnar
Li Weifeng
John Spencer
Claus Thomsen
Gareth Farrelly (forgiven though for THAT goal)
the return of Jeffers
Tobias Linderoth
David Ginola
Richard Wright
Steve Simonsen

The single biggest mistake, one Alex Nyarko! Utter utter turd, and the contract mess made it even worse. We had to pay this guy for a year for being shite when he couldn't even play! I could have done that for half the wages!

Thats me depressed now thinking about all the shite I've been exposed to in my 29 years on this earth. I wish I could properly remember the80s!
Ray Roche
869   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:28:51

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John Srteet.

John, what are you saying, that Stevens was a bad signing? Or a poor replacement for Collins? ANYONE would struggle to take the place of Collins, who remains one of the finest players I've seen in a blue shirt. But Stevens was a very good player in his time at Everton.Don't you mean Brian Harris? He was a contempory of Temple and Stevens. Jimmy Harris, another good player, had left by then. Stevens, incidentally, was an ever present in our Championship side of 62-63 so he couldn't have been that bad a player...
Your inference in your comment @818 is that Stevens was in some way a poor replacement. He wasn't poor, just different.
Errol Stafford
870   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:43:59

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John O'Kane
Marc Hottiger
Tony Thomas
Earl Barrett
Alec Cleland
Graham Allen
Jon O'Connor
Mitch Ward

A list of truly awful right-backs from recent times that makes you consider that maybe Tony Hibbert isn't that bad after all!
Mark Murphy
871   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:45:03

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Geoof Nulty wasnt great but he was by no means one of our worst transfers in!
He had some decent games for us and was beginning to click when that fucking yard dog hit him!
Neil Pickering
872   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:53:05

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Anyone remember Rodrigo? He was the fat little Brazillian Moyes signed for about 1 million. He came with a rep as a free-kick specialist but was absolute gash of the highest order lol!
Tony Watson
873   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:57:21

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Mo Johnston was pretty bad too - he came with such hype and fanfare and I seem to remember it taking him an age to score his first goal. And there weren't many more that followed.
Alex Mullan
874   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:55:41

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Neil Pickering,

Aye Rodrigo was terrible - not so much for the football, more for the fact that he broke his leg getting off the plane from Brazil and never played!

For sheer shite, you have to say Per Kroldrup is up there with the best of them. That was just a failure on our part.

Didn't we once sign that Egyptian lad, Ibrahim Said?

What about Idan Tal? I don't even remember if he was good to be fair, seems ages back!
Tony Watson
875   Posted 19/01/2012 at 11:59:42

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..and I can't believe no one has mentioned Preki yet!!
Alex Mullan
876   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:03:54

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Paul Gascoigne

Abel Xavier *shudder*
Tony Watson
877   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:06:19

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Harsh on Gascoigne I feel, he had his moments - he wasn't in the same class as Mitch Ward or Preki!!
Errol Stafford
878   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:13:50

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Paul Holmes

Kenny Sansom

Mike £1m Milligan
Andrew Fair
879   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:17:53

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Lei Weifeng!!!!!
Andrew Fair
880   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:18:32

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Lei Weifeng!!!!! Came as part of the Keijan deal, i think to keep Li Tie company until he was settled. What a joke!
Chris Verghoden
881   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:32:43

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Ahh Brett Angell...QPR at Loftus Road in 95. Brett comes on and clatters one of their lads. Ref comes over to brandish the yellow and the away fans to a man chant "Off, Off, Off" Priceless !!
Liam Appleby
882   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:35:10

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Gk - Richard Wright
DL - Terry Phelan
DR - Peter Degn
DC - Per Kroldrup
DC - Claus Thomsen
ML - Stephen Hughes
MR - Mitch Ward
MC - Tony Thomas
MC - Alex Nyarko
FC - Bakayoko
FC - James Beattie
Tony Doran
883   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:35:00

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Davey Unsworth and Richard Dunn should have kept hold of these. I believe we now don't have anyone else in the squad qualified to pull the coach offf the motorway in case of a breakdown. Like goalies and heavywieght boxers they would now just be coming into thier prime. The only one who may have potential for this roll is Big Vic.
Tony Doran
884   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:42:28

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Any body remember a boy called Williamson from W Ham. Cost about £4m and that was years ago.
Kevy Quinn
885   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:48:48

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Best Mailbag shout in awhile.

Im 27 and too young to remember some mentioned but reading the illustrious list of tubes we have signed over the years is quite funny! i had forgot about many of them but that doesnt excuse how bad they were/are.

Best Bargain - Davy Weir or Stubbsy on free.
Worst - Think its already been covered but I woulg go for Espen Barsdaen.

Tony McNulty
886   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:55:45

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We might have done a few bad deals down the years, but in terms of sheer waste of money on a succession of duds, this is one competition the Shite would win hands down.
John Daley
887   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:32:16

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Shit signings! We've been spoilt for choice. It's difficult to whittle it down to 'the worst ever so I'm just gonna rattle of a few of my (least) favourites.

Claus Thomsen: I can't remember anything of note he ever did. I can't even remember what he looked like. I just remember wincing whenever the ball went anywhere near him.

David Ginola: I remember turning up for his debut and wondering why the fuck Walter was playing Peter Stringfellow on the wing instead.

Per Kroldrup: it's not often you pay £5m for a centre half only to discover after the fact that he can't fucking head the ball. So bad he was binned off after one game.

Jasper Blomqvist: mercurial winger with about as much artistry as the motherfucker who created Dogtanian and the three muskahounds. Another mediocre player living off his 'latterly of Manchester United' label.

Richard Wright: the master of disaster. His decision making was worse than that guy who decided on a whim to taser his bird in the face, stuff her in an old computer box and bury her alive because he was a bit bored of her. He always reminded me of the 'Don't ...' horror films of the video nasty era ('Don't go in the house', 'Don't go in the woods', 'Don't answer the phone' etc) except his were a bit more mundane: 'Don't go in the loft','Don't get out the bath', 'Don't go near the 'wet grass' sign'.

John Spencer: made Mikel Madar look like Marradona.

Danny Williamson: Everton career decimated by injuries. Not his fault, but a massive waste of money.

Brett Angell: and you thought Beckford looked out of his league?

Bily: at a time we couldn't afford to waste any money Moyes splashed £9m on the street urchin from 'Oliver' looking left-sided specialist. Except he can't actually play on the left and he's not really special at anything, unless you count looking like you're shitting yourself as a skill these days. No pace, no power, no sense of positioning, poor first touch, and all the fight of Ned fucking Flanders.
Phil Rodgers
888   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:58:00

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I know he scored an extremely important goal. But gareth farrelly was abysmal. 97/98 was a "great" year for terrible players.
Alun Jones
889   Posted 19/01/2012 at 12:58:14

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Terry Darracott just because of the league cup final replay against villa
Noel Lynam
892   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:14:09

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Peter Degn wins. So bad that you couldn't even sell him on Championship Manager. Didn't Kenwright admit once we got sold a dud by an agent with this lad?

Tony Thomas a close second. So far out of his depth it was untrue.
Richard Tarleton
894   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:13:56

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It depends on your age, but Bernie Wright and Bobby Laverick were abysmal left wingers, Ernie Hunt was unlucky and unneeded, as was Henry Newton.Alan Shackleton was pretty dire and so was Earl Barrett and selling Bobby Collins, Roy Vernon and Alan Ball far too quickly
Tom Bowers
896   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:15:07

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Let's face it Everton have signed more usless articles than any other Premiership club.
On the selling side the biggest gaffs where Ball and Rooney but sometimes club politics and players demands come into play.
i question Everton's policies about some players we let go especially defenders the likes of Lescott, Dunn and Keown all of whom have or did become very high consistant performers with other clubs.
Even Materazzi who went to Inter and excelled himself back into the Italian national team.
What is wrong with the Everton set up I wonder?
Drew O'Neall
897   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:27:08

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MULLER

"Mike Walker once called a press conference to announce the signing of Müller for Everton, only for him to walk out on the club 30 minutes prior upon discovering he had to pay tax on his £20,000 per week wages, and would not be receiving a free house or car."
Ray Robinson
898   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:20:00

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Alex #984, I'm sure that I saw Rodrigo play in a pre-season testimonial and both his legs were intact!

Can't argue with selections so far but Bernie Wright, Rod Belfitt and Claus Thomsen have to be right up there.

Anyone remember goalkeeper Seamus McDonagh and a follicly challenged left back John McLaughlin?
Tom Rowe
899   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:19:36

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Gazza and Ginola where the most embarrassing. Being called 'The elephants graveyard of the Premier League'. If Davey Weir signs and plays ahead of Duffy Im going to be a Tranmere fan so I can watch the Everton youngsters develop.
Tom Rowe
900   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:19:36

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Gazza and Ginola where the most embarrassing. Being called 'The elephants graveyard of the Premier League'. If Davey Weir signs and plays ahead of Duffy Im going to be a Tranmere fan so I can watch the Everton youngsters develop.
Alex Mullan
902   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:25:27

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I have to say Paul Gerrard always made me nervous when he played in goal. Not the worst, but he was shite.

Stephen Hughes
Bilic
Pistone (was it him who played Alan Shearer 'offside' on a throw?)

Alexanderson and tobias Linderoth hardly set Goodison alight either.

Interesting that the majority of these 'worst signings' appear to be from the Walter era, not that many under Moyes
Steve Barr
903   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:35:50

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Surely the legendry Bernie Wright from Walsall in the 70's has to be the worst!
Richard Parker
904   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:33:06

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Gravesen's 2nd tour of duty was a bit of a 'mare.

Have to say I always though Gosling was rather shit, although not the worst.

Idan Tal was typical of the Championship quality players brought in under Smith, but again no worse than a lot of others.



As far as I'm concerned, the worst bit of business in recent memory is Yak to Blackburn for £1.5M, that might just be cos he's scored more goals than the entire Everton squad put together, or thereabouts.
Paul Olsen
905   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:20:39

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The winner of this one is somewhere in the previous posts, no doubt. So many memories, oh the memories.......

Bugsy Burrows, Tony Thomas, Peter Degn, Vinny Samways, Claus Fucking Thompsen, Per Krĝldrup, Niclas Alexandersson, Scot Gemmill, Danny Williamson, Bret Angell, Mo Johnston, Ibrahima Bakayoko, Alex Nyarko, Richard Wright, Steve Simonsen, Andy Van der Meyde, Bily, Tobias Linderoth, Alec Cleland, Mitch Ward, John Oster, Carl Tiler, Earl Barrett, Marc Hottiger all spring to mind as truly awful.

Some even worthy of a second mention, but i can`t bring myself to writing their names twice....
Christopher Brown
906   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:20:00

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All good shouts - my personal un-favourite was Mike Milligan.

Signed from Oldham in 1990, he was Colin Harvey's last grasp at a replacement for Peter Reid.

£1m and half an hour into his debut at Goodison against Leeds, with Speed, MacAllister, Batty and Strachan passing him by into a 3-0 lead, a fan runs onto the pitch straight for 'Spike' Milligan to politely ask him to pull his effin' finger out!

We got rid about a year later I think and he was never heard of again
Christopher Brown
907   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:40:26

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Perhaps Milligan was the start of it all... we didn't half sign some shite players in the 90s :(
Peter Warren
908   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:40:59

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Jo
Dave White
910   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:43:40

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The way we lost Gosling....OOOPS! I hope someone got fired for that!

Some hilarious posts on here by the way, nice to hear everyone having a bit of a laugh in these grim times!

'So bad you couldn't even sell him on Championship Manager'....fucking genius son!
Ray Roche
911   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:39:20

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Paul Olsen

Oh the memories? Oh the mammaries, more like. What a load of tits...
John de Frece
913   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:55:11

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Didnt we technically "buy " Mike Walker
surely that must take the cake !
Richard Parker
914   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:39:36

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We have endured an awful lot of shite, although much of it was at bargain basement prices. There were some embarrassing ones, especially Gazza, Ginola and Jeffers return.

A few of the best bits of business for me: -

Selling Rooney - although he was worth more, he'd have been surrounded by shite and the money we got from his sale helped us get into Europe for several years.

Martyn for 500k - best keeper since Southall at Everton.

Lescott for 2.5M and sold for over 20M, good player, better profit.

Kevin Campbell - almost singlehandedly kept us in the Premiership, fuck know where we'd have ended up if we hadn't brought him in on loan. He was like a blue Batman and Jeffers was Robin.

Arteta, Pienaar, Gravesen all for about 2M each. Davey Weir, Richard Gough and Yobo get honourable mentions for not being shit and not costing much either.
Guy Rogers
915   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:41:14

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Drew, about the time we were going to sign Muller we were also going to sign Viola another Brazilian kid you remember that?

In terms of the ones that got away what about Stan Collymore for 8.5 million, gutted that he chose the reds at the time!
Kevin Tully
916   Posted 19/01/2012 at 13:58:59

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Shandy Andy & Gosling can never be included in this list.

Best night in recent memory - knocking the shite out of the cup in the last few minutes.

Shandy crossed & Gosling's shot took two deflections, that made it even sweeter!
Mark Murphy
918   Posted 19/01/2012 at 14:20:21

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Raymundo, Jim McDonagh and "Tiger" MacLaughlin were not embarassingly bad players!
From what Ive seen so far Straqualaqua could fall into that category though!

All of the above considered I'm going for Belfit in for Johnson out as the worst business. I know there were other reasons for Johnson being moved on but he was 10 times the footballer that Belfit was and came back to haunt us.
Then we made it worse by getting him back when he was finished, thus removing our moral superiority.
Tony J Williams
920   Posted 19/01/2012 at 14:33:14

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"Jasper Blomqvist: mercurial winger with about as much artistry as the motherfucker who created Dogtanian and the three muskahounds"

For me, the post of the year so far. I had to explain to the person sitting next to me why I was pissing myself laughing so much.

Quality
Ray Roche
921   Posted 19/01/2012 at 14:48:02

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Sorry,Tony,
"' If this is the School of Science he's the fucking lab rat!'

Got to be the funniest.
Liam Appleby
923   Posted 19/01/2012 at 14:33:22

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Worst ever signing - Bakayoko

Best ever signing - David Moyes

John Sreet
925   Posted 19/01/2012 at 15:14:19

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Ray Roche,

Never said Stevens was a bad player, the discussion is worst ever transfer......in or out! My comment merely suggests that Collins was the worst transfer, and replaced by an inferior player, a bit like Arteta replacing Fabregas.........Stevens wasn't poor, but Collins was genius!
Steven Reddish
927   Posted 19/01/2012 at 15:33:18

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worst mistake i can think of was selling gary speed,big dunc,shocking!!!
Steven Reddish
928   Posted 19/01/2012 at 15:34:23

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oh and as for buys,cant believe we had gazza ,ginola,mark hughes and john spencer,would of been great if we had tehm 10yrs earlier in thier careers
Stephen Leary
931   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:04:31

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Worst Billy hes fucking shit a wimp. Kroldrup maybe but i feel is harsh as he only ever got one game against Milwall in cup replay and we won. As for best i would have to say arteta and cahill, and tommy gravesen to
Matty Dawkins
932   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:08:57

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Peter Degn, Claus Thomsen, Tony Thomas, Carl Tiler, Danny Williamson.
Adam Bennett
933   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:11:33

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The first bad buy I can remember was Ian Wilson.

I?ve heard an anecdote whereby he went down injured and the physio went on the pitch to treat him. When the physio came back to the bench, the subs and coaches where laughing and Colin Harvey was shaking his head. The physio asked what was up and Harvey said ?you was supposed to bring Wilson off and leave the sponge on!?

Pistone as well. Friends of mine are quite shocked with there sheer venom that spews from me when his name his mentioned. I absolutely hated him! The only left back I know who?d spend the game more closer to his centre half than the opposing right winger. Think there was a game when Man Utd scored 4 past us and 3 of them came from the right wing. Slow, couldn?t pass, couldn?t tackle, had a twat of facial tache thing ferret on his face and was basically just shit. I could not fucking stand him! For some reason he hit button on me which resulted in a sheer dislike for him!

The best, off the top of my head, £1.5m for Tim Cahill has to be right up there.
Shaun Brennan
934   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:07:23

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What about that tart Westervald aswell.

James McFadden Mark II?

Billy for the inital cost.
Charlie Percival
936   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:22:36

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Andrei Kanchelskis
John Keating
938   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:16:38

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Actually 3 of the best buys have been for literally nowt from The RS
Morrissey
Sheedy
Harper
Brilliant buy was Alex Young who totally captured the support when he arrived.
One of the greatest bits of business - which ended in tears - was buying the fabulous Tony Kay who I reckon would have definetely Captained England.
Biggest FU was letting Roy Vernon go too early
Ray Roche
942   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:26:21

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John Street.

At least we agree on Collins's genius! The impact he had on Leeds was terrific; what a loss he was. His outgoing was a huge mistake, but Stevens's arrival, taken as a transfer as opposed to a replacement, was a good one.

Reading through this thread, there are many comments on good buys as well as bad ones. It's a bit of a bugger that the bad outweigh the good...
Liam Appleby
945   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:55:17

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Charlie Percival -

Andrei Kanchelskis is surely in one of best signings??
Tony Cheek
946   Posted 19/01/2012 at 15:13:32

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Must be Straq or Bily. Not because they are complete carthorses, but because they will leave Everton without getting a real chance to show what they can do.
Peter Mills
950   Posted 19/01/2012 at 16:53:43

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Mick Ferguson?
The story goes that one day Kendall went into the showers at Bellefield only to find a turd on the floor. He stormed out to the players and shouted "who's shit on the floor?", to which someone replied "Mick is, Boss, but he's not bad in the air".
Thomas Windsor
951   Posted 19/01/2012 at 17:15:32

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Selling Howard Kendall in the swop deal to get Latchford should have just paid cash .
Great player Howard and if i remember correct he was our player of the year when we sold him.
Stephen Doyle
957   Posted 19/01/2012 at 17:26:14

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Marc Hottiger and Claus Thomsen were my personal worst players of all the names mentioned, they were fucking shite! Although I remember for a game at QPR I think, Stuart Barlow and Brett Angell were our strikeforce! That gives me a shudder! Mind you at least we had 2 up front then haha!
Phil Rodgers
961   Posted 19/01/2012 at 17:45:57

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"Jasper Blomqvist: mercurialwingerwith aboutasmuch artistry as the motherfucker who created Dogtanian and the three muskahounds".

Absolutely hilarious
Adrian Seal
965   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:07:35

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Phil Rodgers: '97/98 was a "great" year for terrible players.'

Great shout! That last Howard Kendall side was the worst I've ever seen in over 30 years of following the Blues.

...but I do remember how truly and utterly awful Claus Thompson was (and being appalled that he was allegedly on £10,000 a week!)
Tony Watson
967   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:19:53

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Sorry, pressed the wrong button...

Tony Cheek (#946) - if the phrase "carthorse" wasn't invented for Denis Straqualursi, then I don't know what was!
Andy Crooks
971   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:34:48

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I think every deal mentioned is dwarfed by £35 MILLION FOR ANDY CARROLL! Say it out loud and it lifts the spirits remarkably. They could have got nearly nine Babayokos for that.
Phil Brown
975   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:34:26

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Little fat Joe Harper from Aberdeen had a good debut but was crap from then on.
Nick Entwistle
976   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:44:53

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But Andy, essentially it was Suarez and Carrol swapped in for Torres. The money wasn't really an issue for Liverpool. Neither for Chelsea. Newcastle must be pissing themselves though with Ba scoring freely.
Adolf Ng
977   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:47:16

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Andrew Fair (880): my friend was a very good friend of the Chinese/English translator for Li Tie and Li Weifeng. From what he said, Weifeng (and his mother also) was actually very jealous of Li Tie's (first year) success. Also, while the official reason for Weifeng's return to China was injury, but the reality was that he could not accept the fact he was lonely and, more importantly, was not happy of not being treated as a "superstar" in Liverpool (like he was in China)... so, "keeping Li Tie company" was certainly impossible...
Brian Keoghan
978   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:27:01

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Here's a couple for our older readers;Jimmy Payne from Liverpool and Jimmy Glazzard from Huddersfield,completely clapped out when we signed them.Best signing ever(apart from a man called Dean!) ? Imagine a combination of Reid,Ball and Harvey- and you have Bobby Collins.
Paul Clarke
979   Posted 19/01/2012 at 18:48:06

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Best bargain: Neville Southall. £150k. With us for 16 years, for much of that time he was the best in his position in the country (at his peak, probably the best in the world). His performances earned (saved?) us more points than any outfield player. He made an outstanding side great ? think what we would have won with Bobby Mimms in goal.
Paul Gladwell
983   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:07:21

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Tony, as I mentioned last week a mate of mine who's lad is in the youth team set up told me they where all watching the first team train at Finch farm and everyone was pissing themselves laughing at how bad he was and one first team member who I won't name called him the worst pro he has ever seen (Strach).
As for Bily not getting a chance, how many games has he started? And how many did he have Every match going blue screaming to get him off and to be fair to Moyes most times he has, but why start him if that is what happens? Did you manage to see him at home the other week getting passed to death by plumbers and carpenters when Moyes played him in his role these lads have wanted him played in, he's shite and had his chance.
Paul Gladwell
984   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:16:42

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The young lads were pissing themselves laughing as he could not control a ball or head or shoot and what I have seen in those two starts and a few sub appearances is just that, although he does have a good engine on him, but so do I.
Anthony Millington
987   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:29:51

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Bily, Richard Wright, Beattie, Davies, Kroldrup, Fellaini (dare I say it). Just some of the millions Moyes has wasted. That's a good 45 mill gone there I'd say. Oh yeah Van der Meyde (almost forgot!)
David Hallwood
988   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:18:02

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Walking or wobbling through memory lane, I was quite surprised how many of our players I have completely erased from the memory bank-must have something to do with trauma. The worst-too many to chose from but Claus Thomsen is up there with the 'best'
Barry Rathbone
989   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:28:58

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Jim Pearson

Mickey Walsh
Paul Gladwell
992   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:52:23

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Has anyone mentioned Ian Wilson, fuck me he looked more like a geography teacher and played like one.
Ian Bennett
994   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:52:10

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And we actually paid good money for this guff:-

Mo Johnson
John Spencer
Alexandersson
Nyarko
Bakayoko
Bilic
Paul Gerrard
Brett Angell
Simon Davies
Richard Wright
Mike Miligan

15 years too late:-
Ginola
Gazza
Sansom
Mark Hughes
James Newcombe
995   Posted 19/01/2012 at 19:28:35

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"Jesper Blomqvist: mercurial winger with about as much artistry as the motherfucker who created Dogtanian and the three muskahounds"

Genius.
Barry Roberts
996   Posted 19/01/2012 at 20:01:49

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Having read all the previous posts, i have to agree with them. The confusing thing is that im now feeling better about our current squad. How did that happen?
Stephen Smyth
000   Posted 19/01/2012 at 20:22:20

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Best Buy: Andy King £35 grand from Luton, what a player.

Worst Buy: Drew Brand I think from Huddersfield, a goalkeeper ? my arse.
Stephen Smyth
007   Posted 19/01/2012 at 20:39:15

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Apologies we didn't buy Drew Brand he came through the ranks, god someone should have been sacked for that.

Anyway, worst buy and my own biggest disappointment was Mo Johnston. I thought he would score a bagful for us.
Mark Riding
010   Posted 19/01/2012 at 20:42:49

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Best: Kanchelskis.

The last signing that I thought.. 'Wow.. glad we got him!' (Obviously the Southalls, Fergusons, go without saying.)

Worst... still a work in progress... but I reckon if you logged into Toffeeweb in a few years.,Fellaini will be the biggest waste of money & wages the club would have known!
Jonathan Dunnett
017   Posted 19/01/2012 at 21:41:56

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I've looked through all the comments and don't think I've come across this player which makes me question if this Dutch right back with the hilarious mullet named Ray Attevald ever existed?! I'm pretty sure he did exist, "played" right back for us and that he was utter toss.
Lee Courtliff
025   Posted 19/01/2012 at 21:42:19

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Am I the only person who thought Marc Hottiger was actually quite good for us? I had a season ticket when he played for us and I always remembered him being decent. He was a damn sight better than Barret and he worked well with Kanchelskis, who had his best run of form with Hottiger playing behind him. I think poor Marc gets a raw deal on here. Bless him.
Robbie Shields
039   Posted 19/01/2012 at 22:15:10

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Neil Macdonald anyone, I was thinking of him when I posted Neil Adams (Sorry Mr Adams), but to be fair, I can't remember much about Adams either. But Neil Macdonald replacing Gary Stevens, OMG, Milligan replacing Reid WTF.

Just going an interesting piece on Harvey's signings, Liverpool spent the Rush money (3.2 million) on Barnes, Beardsley, Aldridge and Houghton, Harvey spent the Lineker money on Cottee, Neil Macdonald and Mike Milligan, that is where the rot started for me.
Bobby Thomas
050   Posted 19/01/2012 at 22:21:44

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Christ we have had some bad full backs.........Neil McDonald anyone? In fact virtually anyone Colin Harvey signed aside from Keown and Hinchcliffe, as they mostly cost a fair bit. We all have different viewpoints but i could nevfer warm to that phoney Tony "Simod Cup" Cottee. He was garbage from the spot as well.

For the money we paid, in the position he was signed in, Ian Snodin.

Yes, Maurice Johnston!! Kendall in decline. Mark Ward says in his book that he took a couple of looks at MoJo in training and thought, your gone, was rooming with him at the time and pretty much told him so.

Anyone said Amokachi, cant remember, i he was shite!!
Bobby Thomas
053   Posted 19/01/2012 at 22:41:09

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Fucking hell thats spooky!! Well in Robbie lad!!!

Full agreement as you may guess!!

Peter Beardssley and Paul Gascoigne went for approximately the same cash as Cottee, and we ended up with TC.

I remember the Echo article heralding Mike Milligans signing, "Colin harvey has signed himself". Out of his depth and fucked off back to Oldham by Kendall pronto.
Bobby Thomas
057   Posted 19/01/2012 at 22:46:02

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If no-one's said it already, Paul Power for a grade a bargin. And if someone has, then you're fucking correct.
Peter Fearon
065   Posted 19/01/2012 at 23:06:34

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Per Krĝldrup has to rank as the most pointless purchase of the modern era.

I was very disappointed when Marco Materazzi went and of course everyone was heartbroken when Alan Ball was sold, including Bally.

The worst piece of business we ever did in my opinion was selling Duncan McKenzie to Chelsea. For me that closed down the School of Science era.

Even in the mid-80s we never had anyone with the same pure talent including Gary Lineker but McKenzie rightly demanded absolute freedom on the field and then manager Gordon Lee wouldn't give him his head.
Danny Broderick
070   Posted 19/01/2012 at 23:23:15

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GK - Jan Mucha
RB - Peter Degn
LB - Alessandro Pistone
CB - Per Kroldrup
CB - Claus Thomsen
RW - Niclas Alexandersson
LW - Ian Wilson
CM - Billy
CM - Mark Pembridge
CF - Bakayoko
CF - Brett Angel

Subs:
Paul Gerrard
Mitch Ward
Li Weifeng
John Oster
Mike Milligan
Michael Branch
Stuart Barlow

Don't have nightmares!
Mark Riding
071   Posted 20/01/2012 at 00:02:28

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Danny #070.. more than a match for most home teams seen at Goodison this season !
Anthony Jones
073   Posted 20/01/2012 at 00:17:01

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Pound for pound it has to be Bily.

Claus Thomsen was fucking tragic though.
Jamie Sweet
074   Posted 20/01/2012 at 00:42:29

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A few mentions above for Mick Madar. What actually happened to him? I was at Selhurst Park to watch his debut and he notched a brace. I remember being quite impressed at the time.

6 goals in 19 games for the Blues, and then moved on.

Not quite in the same league as Brett Angel in terms of complete shiteness surely?!
Jamie Sweet
076   Posted 20/01/2012 at 00:43:33

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Ooh la la, I just found Madar's bio on Toffeeweb to answer my own question. Sounds like he had a bit of a bust up with old Walter Smith.

Funny that his bio on here states one of his weaknesses as being that he was "too classy".

Maybe that was Claus Thomsen's problem too?

Maybe not.

I'll get me coat.
Mick Davies
081   Posted 20/01/2012 at 01:39:45

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Everton's worst signing? Steve Round
Mark Stone
082   Posted 20/01/2012 at 01:57:44

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I wonder if 'George Weah' had rung Joe Royle, how many caps Ali Dia could have got for us? I reckon he'd have had a fruitful career and ended up on the coaching staff!
Mick Davies
084   Posted 20/01/2012 at 01:46:56

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On a more positive note, our best signings: Latchford, Kendall, Gray, Campbell, Martyn, Dave Thomas, Mountfield, Reid, Sheedy and a certain W R Dean
Ernie Baywood
088   Posted 20/01/2012 at 04:56:29

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Always remember a story about Madar that he spent a game niggling and spitting at Tony Adams. Adams asked Duncan what the deal was with him and Duncan said "just chin him, he's a cunt".

Might be bollocks but I like it.
Robbie Shields
089   Posted 20/01/2012 at 05:44:36

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Bobby #053, yep that is more than a bit spooky! Great minds eh! Not only the same thoughts, but communicated in the same way....... Neil Macdonald anyone.... Mentioning Harvey and Cottee.........

Be afraid!
Robbie Shields
090   Posted 20/01/2012 at 05:50:17

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What about Wayne Clarke as a great signing along with Paul Power, boy did he know where the net was. I think his big problem was that he came after Lineker and didn't have any pace.
Dave Wilson
092   Posted 20/01/2012 at 07:03:18

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Jay #807

Spot on. Poor old Keeleys Everton career lasted for 27 lamentable minutes
Paul Gladwell
095   Posted 20/01/2012 at 07:17:11

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Bobby even Keown was an embarrassment when he first signed him, I remember him trying a back heel at cityy away and the whole Everton end just burst into laughter he was that bad and yet look what he became, maybe we should persist with Bily!!!!!!!!
The Pembridge shout is harsh as he turned into a decent player in the end too.
Chris Thornton
109   Posted 20/01/2012 at 09:19:04

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Imre Varadi, Eamonn O'Keefe, the batch of signings Kendall made when he took over (Alan Biley, Alan Ainscow, Mick Ferguson, Mickey Thomas, Mike Walsh), Ray Atteveld and Stefan Rehn.

Neville Southall and Graeme Sharp have to be two of the best signings we ever made.

I hope the people who write in to Toffeeweb saying things like the present side is the worst they've seen in 60 years have had their memories jogged by this thread...
Bob Willis
114   Posted 20/01/2012 at 09:46:43

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Stevenson was bought for £4m from Tranmere by Johnson purely as a way of transferring funds from EFC to Tranmere!

Alan Ball had personal (financial) problems I believe so any signing on fee was meant to sort that out.
Mike Rourke
138   Posted 20/01/2012 at 11:46:28

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Great thread.

In the spirit of knowing my history would anyone care to elaborate of the story of Bernie 'the bolt' Wright? Sounds hilariously bad. Everyone on here who remembers him seems to be unanimous. Why was he so terrible?
Cameron White
174   Posted 20/01/2012 at 14:30:09

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Great response to my original post, which has brought back plenty of memories I wish I didn't have!

I'd like to give a mention to Slaven Bilic. Great player for West Ham and I was delighted when he signed for us for £4.5 million. Unfortunately he seemed to be booked every week, spent almost a quarter of the season suspended, got injured, and was allowed to go back to Zagreb where Everton continued to pay him £27,000 a week to sit and do nothing, other than train with the national team and turn out for them against Ireland. We then paid off his remaining contract for a further £1 million!

Regarding Bernie Wright, I never saw him play... so I get all my information from the book I mentioned in my OP, "Everton in the 1970s" ? available via the EFPF website with all money going to them, so a good cause.

Bernie was signed from Walsall for £35,000 a few days after playing against us in the FA Cup. He made his debut against Liverpool as a sub and his full debut at Old Trafford. In all, he played 10 games plus one as sub and scored twice including a diving header against West Ham. Reading the match reports in the book he also hit the post a couple of times so I can't believe he was as bad as Big Brett who I did see play, unfortunately.

Part of Bernie's legend comes from the way he left Everton, sacked after turning up drunk for training where he alledgedly punched one of the coaches. He eventually rejoined Walsall.
Mark Stone
182   Posted 20/01/2012 at 14:55:48

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Ernie Beywood (#088) true story - it's in Tony Adams' autobiography.
David McKee
193   Posted 20/01/2012 at 15:14:47

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Sooo Funny... but what about my dear ole friend Mark Pembridge???

Now there's a man who was in the wrong place at the wrong time... his mother's womb!!!
Mike Gray
217   Posted 20/01/2012 at 15:46:29

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Stefan Rehn was a poor player!! The only sub (i believe who was so poor), who was subbed).

Mitch Ward was a poor player, but to me, the poorest I ever seen was Kevin Langley, woefully out of his depth!!
Scott Hamilton
221   Posted 20/01/2012 at 15:56:53

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Has to be Steve Simonsen.

Bought for a then record fee from Tranmere Rovers when Peter Johnson controlled both clubs.

If I recall correclt, shortly afterwards Johnson exited Goodison...

... a very clever of way moving £3.3m Mr. Johnson! (allegedly)
Scott Hamilton
228   Posted 20/01/2012 at 16:08:58

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Mind you: Slaven Bilic

£4.5m quid and signed when Dave Watson was caretaker manager
Mark Stone
238   Posted 20/01/2012 at 16:25:32

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Gravesen and Limpar aside, the thought of a Scandinavian in royal blue sends a shiver down my spine. Alexandersen, Linderoth, Thomsen, Degn, Blomqvist, Rehn, Myhre, Kroldrup. Sure there are more!
Scott Hamilton
239   Posted 20/01/2012 at 16:36:57

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To be fair Mark, the ratio you show of 20% quality, 80% shite is true of our signings in general regardless of nationality!
Mark Stone
245   Posted 20/01/2012 at 16:48:20

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Scott, all of a sudden I'm relieved we've got no money to buy anyone!
Scott Hamilton
246   Posted 20/01/2012 at 17:00:45

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That's right Mark. We need enough money to sign 5 players before we can be comfortable of getting some quality!
James Flynn
274   Posted 20/01/2012 at 18:47:42

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Well, news in the States today that Galaxy is definately interested in Lampard. But one of Beckham (just signed), Keane or Landon would have to go to make room for a "designated" player.

Who knows, maybe we could add Landon as one of the good transfer-ins.
Lee Baines
275   Posted 20/01/2012 at 18:32:45

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"Worst Billy hes fucking shit a wimp. Kroldrup maybe but i feel is harsh as he only ever got one game against Milwall in cup replay and we won."

Not true. I remember being unfortunate enough to travel to Villa Park on a cold December night (think it was 2005??), only to witness Kroldrup has the back ripped out of him by Baros and one of the Moore brothers (forget which one). Absolutely shocking player - we always shout from the stands "I can do better than that!" - he's one example of where it's totally true!

As for the rest, Christ!! I've been reading this thread through my fingers at times! Ian Wilson, Cleland, Pembridge, Degn, Tony Thomas, Linderoth all get notable mentions. Jesus, Walter Smith signed some shite!!!
Chris de Costa
302   Posted 20/01/2012 at 19:39:54

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What about Kevin Mcleod, Michael Branch and Stuart Barlow, I know we didn't sign them but they certainly didn't live up to there potential at Everton and definitely worth a mention. Also has anyone mentioned John O'Kane yet?
James Martin
304   Posted 20/01/2012 at 20:32:06

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The biggest joke is that some of the names being banded about here could probably get in this squad somewhere. Any of the forwards mentioned you would be probably be at least tempted over the course of this season to give them a run out. My opinion is that 12-15 million for Fellaini will eventually be viewed as one of the largest wastes of money at this club during a period where we are poverty stricken.
Gavin Ramejkis
309   Posted 20/01/2012 at 20:33:31

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There's so many you could roll a long list, Scott Gemmill was an utter shithouse who used to run away from the ball and I wondered how the hell he and his dad were related after that goal against Brazil

Barrett was incredibly shite, I remember when we bought him the joke was the only Barrett anyone shifted (houses at the time joke). Brett Angel couldn't hit a barn door and later genuinely got fitted with contact lenses. Peter Degn, Carl Tiler, Claus Thompson, Stephen Hughes, Alex Nyarko, Linderoth, Alexanderson (shit for us but ok for Sweden?), Lei Weifeng (Lie Tie's mate), Gareth Farrelly, Stracqualarsi, Bilyetdinov, Kroldrup (yes he was dogshit against Villa), Milligan, Simonsen, Richard Wright (rhymes with shite), it just goes on and on
Colin Smith
353   Posted 21/01/2012 at 00:19:22

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Might have missed it but not seen this illustrious name, Glenn Keeley. Can't remember if what the deal was, loan I hope! - but he should have paid us back what ever we paid him.
James Flynn
355   Posted 21/01/2012 at 00:24:40

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Lee (275) - "As for the rest, Christ!! I've been reading this thread through my fingers at times!".

My God!

Some hilarious comments in this thread, but I laughed so hard reading the above my wife came downstairs to see if I was OK.

The players named were THAT bad? I'm still laughing typing this.
Kunal Desai
425   Posted 21/01/2012 at 10:37:32

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Add Gardener and Senderos, even though they were loans. Still shite!
Paul Clarke
453   Posted 21/01/2012 at 11:24:34

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One element in the worst buy equation should be who else we could have got for that money at that time, e.g:
Krĝldrup - summer 2005, his £5 million would have bought Darren Bent and Nolberto Solano and Kevin Doyle, and left change. Whatever you may think of them individually, as a job lot they would certainly have strengthened the squad. I know none of them could play centre half but then, apparently, neither could Krĝldrup.
Alun Jones
426   Posted 24/01/2012 at 15:39:32

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Paul Lodge!!! Threat Angell!! Ian Wilson!! Blues vs Forest 1st game of season, they bring on Franz Carr the fastest winger in the league, we bring wilson the tortoise, shout from the main stand, were going pace for pace, priceless. Great blog.

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