On the coach from West Brom, to the tune of the Venga Boyz, Boom Boom:

Yannick Bolaise, his midfield play, so classy. He plays on the left wing and the right wing too. He puts the crosses in opposition's boxes. For Romelu Lukaku to score a goal or two.


Reader Comments (50)

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Mike Mulhall
1 Posted 23/08/2016 at 10:26:15
Bo bo, bo bo bo bo, bo bo bo bo, bo bo bo bolasie.

Mike Manchester
2 Posted 23/08/2016 at 13:18:40
Rom and Yannik both with Congolese heritage I was thinking Um-Bongo

From way down deep in the middle of the Congo,
Koeman brought Bolasie to Everton to play football,
He stuck him with Lukaku who is also from the Congo,
Rhino said "I Know: Lets play them as a combo!"

A Combo, A Combo, lets play them as a Combo!!!!!

Mike Manchester
3 Posted 23/08/2016 at 13:18:40
Rom and Yannik both with Congolese heritage I was thinking Um-Bongo

From way down deep in the middle of the Congo,
Koeman brought Bolasie to Everton to play football,
He stuck him with Lukaku who is also from the Congo,
Rhino said "I Know: Lets play them as a combo!"

A Combo, A Combo, lets play them as a Combo!!!!!

Simon Lloyd
4 Posted 23/08/2016 at 13:45:25
Mike #2
Whilst enjoying your rhyme, I do feel that perhaps in these modern times where one must tread very carefully with the use of anything that could be taken to have negative connotations (by which I mean Um-Bongo), a simple singing of his surname to the tune of "Volare" might be safer.
As in "Bolassie, oh oh oh oh" starting off at a crescendo and then gradually petering out into half heartedness and then silence in the mode of "Oh Kevin Mirallas".
Not as creative as your rhyme, I grant you, but more likely to protect you from a knock on the door by the PC Police!
:)
Eugene Ruane
5 Posted 23/08/2016 at 13:55:52
Simon - 'Not as creative as your rhyme, I grant you, but more likely to protect you from a knock on the door by the PC Police!'

I'd be more worried about a knock from the Too Much Time On Your Hands Police, or The Shite Scanning Police.

As for the Toe-Curling Stuff SPG, they could have your door off it's hinges.

Mike Manchester
6 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:19:33
Yes I was aware of the tight-rope I was walking. I hope I navigated safely.
And yes I currently have too much free time.
Simon Lloyd
7 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:19:34
The door is swinging off it's one remaining good hinge as we speak...
John Daley
8 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:22:14
"..in these modern times where one must tread very carefully with the use of anything that could be taken to have negative connotations (by which I mean Um-Bongo)"

What? Even the mere tune from the Um-Bongo tv advert minus any 'offending' words is off limits?

Guess that's my 'K-Oeman' chant, sung to the tune of 'Ki-Ora', with the entire Gwladys Street squawking "He's too orangey for crows", gone right down the shitter then.

Mike Manchester
9 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:28:18
Bo-La-Sie,
Bo-La-Sa.
Life goes on
Gordon Crawford
10 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:29:03
Rom and Yanick Boo, where are you?

We got some work to do now.

Rom and Yanick Boo where are you?

We got some goals to score now

To Scooby Doo theme lol. 😉

That's a hit in the making. 😝

Mike Manchester
11 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:37:29
On grass see, he's classy, runs further than Selassie.
You'd better call a taxi, I'm talking 'bout BOLASIE

Colin Gee
12 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:40:53
There's only one Yannick Bolasie...
Dave Pritchard
13 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:48:09
Trad ones are best Colin.
Julian Wait
14 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:49:20
#9 is more manageable :-)

Maybe change the last line to "Bring him on, YEAH!" when we need a striker sub brought on

#10 - not sure about the Scooby Doo one - does that mean our strikers went missing again?

Mike Manchester
15 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:52:46
Last one I promise! It's perfect. Abba's Voulez- vous

People everywhere
A sense of expectation hanging in the air
Giving out a spark
Playing silky football all around the park
And here we go again, we know the start, we know the end
Masters of the scene
We've done it all before and now we're back to get some more
You know what I mean

Bo-La-Sie (ah-ha)
Take it now or leave it (ah-ha)
Now it's all we get (ah-ha)
Nothing promised, no regrets
Bo-La-Sie (ah-ha)
Ain't no big decision (ah-ha)
You know what to do (ah-ha)
La question c'est voulez-vous
Voulez-vous


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=za05HBtGsgU

This could work!

Mike Manchester
16 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:52:46
Last one I promise! It's perfect. Abba's Voulez- vous

People everywhere
A sense of expectation hanging in the air
Giving out a spark
Playing silky football all around the park
And here we go again, we know the start, we know the end
Masters of the scene
We've done it all before and now we're back to get some more
You know what I mean

Bo-La-Sie (ah-ha)
Take it now or leave it (ah-ha)
Now it's all we get (ah-ha)
Nothing promised, no regrets
Bo-La-Sie (ah-ha)
Ain't no big decision (ah-ha)
You know what to do (ah-ha)
La question c'est voulez-vous
Voulez-vous


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=za05HBtGsgU

This could work!

John Daley
17 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:53:28
Why bother with songs anyway? Just shout his name out in an overly earnest, mid fifties manner during uneventful periods of the game :

"Quick Bolasie! Go get help! Gibbo's collapsed and is lying prostate on the pitch like he's plummeted down a mineshaft"

"What's that Bolasie? You suspect some bastard switched Kone's boots with a bear trap and you recommend immediate removal of the offending limb? Bark...I mean pass once for 'yes', play a one-two for 'no'."

Mike Manchester
18 Posted 23/08/2016 at 14:58:45
Just realised that works much better with LUKAKU
John Daley
19 Posted 23/08/2016 at 15:00:18
Nah, Mike. It works much better with a 'tie and blazer badge' combination pack.
Joe Clitherow
20 Posted 23/08/2016 at 15:07:38
Yes, as John just beat me to it.

With partial fading due to sun damage.

Brian Williams
21 Posted 23/08/2016 at 16:21:53
It has to be short and sweet. It has to be Bolasie, oh oh oh oh, Yannick Bolasie oh oh oh oh to the tune of Volare by Dean Martin
Simon Lloyd
22 Posted 23/08/2016 at 16:33:41
Plagiarism Brian, Plagiarism.
You will be hearing from my lawyers directly!
Brian Williams
23 Posted 23/08/2016 at 16:51:35
Sorry mate, had you already suggested that one?
Simon Lloyd
24 Posted 23/08/2016 at 16:55:06
At #4, but it's ok, let's just say that great minds think alike.
Michael Ward
26 Posted 23/08/2016 at 17:18:44
I thought he already had a chant.

To the tune from Heartbeat.

Yannick,
Yannick Bolasie
Run down the wing for me
Yannick Bolasie
Yannick Bolasie
Yannick Bolasie
Yannick Bolasie

James Hughes
27 Posted 23/08/2016 at 17:35:35
Eurovision song contest has reason to be worried now
Eugene Ruane
28 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:01:18
Tut, well none of you saw it!

Chance to reintroduce an old 1970s St End classic and pay homage to our new signing.

Simply take the original..

"I’m a bowlegged chicken, I’m a knocked kneed hen,
Haven’t had a fight since I don’t know when.
I walk with a wiggle and a waddle and a squawk,
Doin’ the Everton boot walk."

..then swap 'bow-legged' with Bolassie - sorted, two birds etc.

(shakes head, mutters 'have I got to do everything round here?')

James Hughes
29 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:18:00
Eugene- WHEN exactly in the 70's, never heard that song ever.
Keith Harrison
30 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:21:31
James, it was definitely around in the 70's,

Carlisle's version was:
"From a knock kneed chicken to a bow-legged hen,
I ain't been so happy since I don't know when,
We all sing in the Warwick Road end,
We are the Carlisle Boot boys"
@1972 onwards.

Both are cringeworthy now though tbh.

Ray Roche
31 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:25:51
James, I've heard it and .it's like an AA meeting here .I admit to SINGING IT! There...I've said it.

"Hi, my names Ray and I sing shite footie songs".

James Hughes
32 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:51:31
Ray and Keith, thank you. I have just spent the last 30 minutes dredging my memory and I can remember the last line being sung

"Doin’ the Everton boot walk." and I can recall the chant, but not the rest of the song

Damn you, Eugene Ruane :)

Michael Ward
33 Posted 23/08/2016 at 18:59:49
Chant I was talking about earlier

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WDd59ZAP5Go

Dean Peamum
34 Posted 23/08/2016 at 20:26:05
To the tune of Mickey by Toni Basil

Hey Yannick, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind,
Bo-lassie, Bo-lassie
Hey Yannick, you're so fine, when you're flying down the line
Bo-lassie, Bo-lassie

Shitty City, what a pity, you don't understand
You gave us 50 million so we signed a better man
Stick your Stones and your Joe Hart loans, you don't understand
It's guys like you Yannick, when you do what you do Yannick,
We love you Yannick

Steve Mink
35 Posted 23/08/2016 at 22:33:42
To the tune of Eleanor Rigby:

Yannick Bolasie, picks up the ball
on the wing and he beats who you please
He's Congolese
Waits for Lukaku, puts in a cross
That Rom buries for fun
He's from Belgium

All the lonely redshite
Where do they all come from?
All the lonely redshite
Where do they all belong?

Aaaaah look at all the lonely redshite
Aaaaah look at all the lonely redshite

Duncan McKenzie... .

Mike Mulhall
36 Posted 24/08/2016 at 10:37:17
Don't cry for me, Yan Bolasieee!
David S Shaw
37 Posted 24/08/2016 at 15:17:18
We could look to rework some of the older songs if anyone knows any.
I heard that there was a good song for Tommy Wright?
Arthur Westhead
38 Posted 24/08/2016 at 19:01:13
Eugene (28) & James (29),

It was definitely around in the early seventies. The words were slightly different:

"I'm a knock-kneed chicken, I'm a bow-legged hen,
I haven't been so happy since I don't know when.
I walk with a wiggle and a waddle and a squawk,
Doin' the Everton boot walk."

It was actually being sung in a bar at the Lille away game and also in Bern at the Young Boys Bern game during our European tour!

Eugene Ruane
39 Posted 24/08/2016 at 19:18:38
Arthur (38) - Think that was the bootleg version.

Bootleg.

Geddit?

(adopts annoyed Frankie Howerd voice) "Tchkkohh suit yerselves!"

David S Shaw
40 Posted 24/08/2016 at 20:59:04
Arthur, would you remember another one we done around then to the Ugly Duckling?
David S Shaw
41 Posted 24/08/2016 at 21:01:01
Steve Mink, did we used to have a song to Eleanor Rigby?
Eric Holland
42 Posted 25/08/2016 at 00:36:14
Do you remember our version of the scarf holding song?

When your smiling.

Dave Speed
43 Posted 25/08/2016 at 08:12:12
It has to be the Booby Latch and Davey Thomas one adapted, if it's not sacrilegious.

His name is Rom Lukaku, the leader of our team,
The finest centre forward that the world has ever seen,
When Yannick takes a corner he pops them in the goal,
And as for Daniel Sturridge you can stick him up yer ole.
Nanananaaaaaaaaaa nana nana na, nana nana nana nana naaa.

Short, sweet, easy to learn or relearn, and catchy.

PS Eric - Same song but the last line "Without yer kecks on"

Dave Speed
44 Posted 25/08/2016 at 08:25:27
Sorry not Booby Latch, Bobby Latch. I had just finished reading about Booby Martinez. I'll hang my head but the song works.
Duncan Lennard
45 Posted 25/08/2016 at 19:41:35
With apologies to John Fogerty...

"Bolasie, a blue tide rising'
Bolasie, he’s surging down the wing
Bolasie, the whole crowd rising'
Bolasie, he makes us want to sing”

Joseph Mullarkey
46 Posted 26/08/2016 at 18:43:34
That's right
That's right
That's right
That's right
We all hate the red shite
Bolasie Bolasie Bolasie Bolasie
We'll beat you with Bolasies' feet

Repeat 100 times.

Joseph Mullarkey
47 Posted 26/08/2016 at 19:17:40
To the tune of Club Tropicana.

Let me take you to a place where Yannick shows his style and grace
He plays his football with our stars
Win the league that is our dream, become the greatest football team
Kick the red shite off to mars

(chorus)

Yannick Bolasie in our team
Goals and sunshine, crossing the ball into Rom
We are the cities football cream
And no worries we've got koe- man.
End.

I know its shoe-horned, try hard and hardly likely to get sung on the terrace's but it made my missus laugh.

Joseph Mullarkey
48 Posted 26/08/2016 at 19:46:43
To the tune of "You are my sunshine"

Oh Rom Lukaku, Oh Rom Lukaku, Yannick Bolasie, Idrissa Gueye
Oh Seamus Coleman, Phil Jagielka, Gareth Barry, Arouna Koné.

Thank you.

Clive Lewis
51 Posted 30/08/2016 at 22:04:54
Ohh Bolasie, ohh Bolasie, ohh Bolasie – to the tune of mad Icelandic viking clapping. Or just overhead clapping when chanting the ooh bit.
Tony Draper
52 Posted 30/08/2016 at 23:39:21
This is probably the most embarrassing thread, anywhere, ever.

Be ashamed.
Be most deeply ashamed.

Joseph Mullarkey
53 Posted 01/09/2016 at 12:52:47
You need to lighten up Tony.

Its nice to be part of a tread that isn't full of despondent comments and general gloominess.

The only shame I feel is to see your negativity at the end, that's a shame.

Hope I haven't personally offended you as that is not my intention, it was merely to defend the fact that a bit of silliness is needed from time to time on TW.


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