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1 Posted 12/10/2016 at 21:36:24
2 Posted 12/10/2016 at 22:13:13
4 Posted 12/10/2016 at 23:39:22
Join us as he uses his unique skillset to slice open the hitherto hidden childhood horrors that could, potentially, lie behind every single problem facing the modern Premier League player.'
Praise For 'Garbutt Get's To The Bottom Of It':
"Revelatory and potentially the most important interactive document to be released into the corridors of academia and the crappers of youth coaches since The Lion King colouring book"
"So proud. So, so, so, so, so, sosososososososo, soooooooooooo proud"
"I really like his hair. You should have yours like that, Richard"
Street Fighter 2 Video Game
Garbutt Get's To The Bottom Of It
Why my mate Big Rom makes a funny screwed up face and sinks his neck and chin below his shoulders when someone swings a cross in:
The terrible truth behind my good buddy Deulofeu's tendency to dive:
Phil Jagielka's raised hands vs a high foot in recent Crystal Palace game clearly linked to childhood ordeal:
5 Posted 12/10/2016 at 23:52:35
6 Posted 13/10/2016 at 02:29:18
7 Posted 13/10/2016 at 03:10:12
To quote a great sage ... 'Deary me...'
8 Posted 13/10/2016 at 06:48:56
9 Posted 13/10/2016 at 07:18:28
10 Posted 13/10/2016 at 13:02:40
11 Posted 13/10/2016 at 14:00:16
Hmm. Not sure if you're (1) just asking out of innocent, slack-jawed curiosity or (2) scandalously trying to suggest I'm seriously tapped in the head? In which case, I'd better cover both bases just to be on the safe side.
No. I'm glad to say a grown man wearing wellies, mittens and a meffy puffa jacket did not muller me round the head with one of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man's (massive) testicles when I was a kid. Thanks for asking though, mate.
Think I'll leave this one to Luke:
Chapter 481: The Fan
'Not only does the innovative Garbutt method allow me to rewind right back to the root childhood cause of any problem currently plaguing a football player, it also proves equally adept at enlightening us as to the key formative events in the life of a troubled football supporter.
Take this chap, Damian Wilde, who recently declared on ToffeeWeb that a current young Everton player was "finished", before following up with the words "I actually can't stand him".
His perception of what the defining characteristic of a fan should be was clearly shaped early on by what he observed from his cot whilst staring open mouthed at the ceiling':
12 Posted 13/10/2016 at 14:08:04
"Poster #7, bit slow with your expected put down, try to get up to speed."
Posted a full 10 hours after my own.
13 Posted 13/10/2016 at 15:17:10
14 Posted 13/10/2016 at 15:31:55
Hope I didn't take too long to respond to that one.
15 Posted 13/10/2016 at 15:50:33
16 Posted 13/10/2016 at 16:04:35
The 'Bobbit Breeze' should be available from your nearest B&Q. Pop in and ask for one. Don't be put off if the staff appear disinterested at first and fail to recognise it by name. Just describe it in great detail and they should soon be giving you their full undivided attention.
17 Posted 13/10/2016 at 16:05:54
18 Posted 13/10/2016 at 16:16:34
19 Posted 13/10/2016 at 16:27:30
20 Posted 13/10/2016 at 16:42:23