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David Moyes will NOT be returning to Everton

| Monday, 23 October 2017  63 Comments  [Jump to last]
The Mirror is now reporting David Moyes will NOT be returning to Everton as manager, after claiming earlier that Moyes was the bookie's favourite.

The Mirror first reported that David Moyes had emerged as the bookmakers' favourite to replace Ronald Koeman as Everton manager.

The Toffees sit third bottom in the Premier League after winning just two of their opening nine league games and the Dutchman has paid the price on Monday afternoon.

Original Source: The Mirror  

Reader Comments (63)

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Michael Kenrick
1 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:13:28
No, no, no, no, no!
Paul Hay
2 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:16:05
Sweet Mary Mother of Jesus - NO!
Carl Allan
3 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:17:16 have Moyes as seconds favourite behind Unsworth but more worrying Allardyce is 4th favourite at just 10/1.
James Lauwervine
4 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:18:58
If this happens I will book myself in for a labotomy
Lawrence Green
5 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:23:58
An updated report from the Mirror says:

David Moyes is not in the running to return to Everton.

The Scotsman is the bookmakers' favourite to replace Ronald Koeman after the Dutchman was sacked on Monday afternoon.

But Mirror Football understands that Moyes will not be back in the Goodison Park hotseat.

Erik Dols
6 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:26:38
When I heard that Koeman was sacked, I thought it was a good thing - didn't look like there was a turnaround on the cards under his helm. But my second thought was that if he gets replaced by a mediocre manager, I'd rather have kept Koeman a bit longer... And there we go: Moyes being touted as his replacement.

I know it doesn't work this way in modern football, but for me, give Unsy the chance for the remainder of the season.

Soren Moyer
7 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:27:39
Moyes' name is just not going away ffs! Sick of hearing his name being mentioned every time we look for a new manager. His time has passed. Period!
Jackie Barry
8 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:29:43
I don’t know what I will do if Moyes comes back, it will show me we have no hope of returning to our former glory days and so therefore what’s the point. This club isn’t supposed to mingle with mediocrity.
James Carlisle
9 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:31:30
Where's the lighter fluid and the box of swan vestas?
Andrew James
10 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:31:56
BK - David?
DM - Oh hello Bill.
BK - Have you seen the news?
DM - I know, inflation is on the rise and my pension is worthless...
BK - No David, the football news?
DM - Ah...yes...we've...I mean...Everton have let Koeman go.
BK - Doing anything at the moment David?
DM - Got an interview with 5 Live on Wednesday week about relegation and a fund raiser dinner at Preston in December.
BK - Time to come back home David. Things have changed a bit.
DM - I know, you've got that Walsh fella and there's money to spend.
BK - Well Farhad has said he knows you are used to a shoe string budget so we can operate like that if it makes you feel better?
DM - Are any of my players still there? Jags and Bainsey I reckon. No, I'll need some money.
BK - Really?
DM - Yes, to bring Ossie out of retirement and raid Sunderland.

Phone goes dead.

DM - Bill? Bill?

Alex Mullan
11 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:41:59
Bring back Ser Davey of Moyes.
Nick Entwistle
12 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:42:00
If there's at least one plus point to Moyes, its the return of Eugene's stories of the Peebles' Champion.
Kim Vivian
13 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:43:13
I'll lean my boat right into the punch here and say that Moyes, with Unsworth could possibly do a job.
Christine Foster
14 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:43:29
DM.. Bill? Sorry about that, the line went dead..
BK- No David I needed to get my medication
DM- Was it something I said?
BK- Never mind.. enjoy your fundraiser
DM- Wait, Bill, sorry.. just having a laugh, of course I don't need money, still have a bag full left from our last jaunt and really, life has been pretty good, so I can do shoestrings
BK- We are in dire straights and I thought who better to turn to than my old mate.
DM- What about that Moshiri fella? Isn't he pulling the strings now?
BK- More money than sense David, I can make this worth your while...
DM- Not sure Bill, things didn't work out for me at Man U, the bas***ds, and Sunderland was awful, never mind my holiday in Spain, ,,
BK- Come home David, the tea lady has your favourite hob nobs ready and we have Wayne back now
DM- Him! You have a bunch of pansies there.. that Sigggy fella, useless, we need Shawcross and I can make Niasse great..
BK- There you go David, didn't take much persuading did it?
DM- No I was waiting for the call to be honest, bags are already packed, will be over at Finch farm in 30 mins..
BK- Hang on David, David?
Steve Ferns
15 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:47:33
If only we had a sketch artist amongst us to turn a few of these in cartoons! Highly amusing guys, keep them coming!
Steve Bell
16 Posted 23/10/2017 at 14:56:03
Let's hope the updated story is the accurate one.
Keith Slinger
17 Posted 23/10/2017 at 15:23:47
Bring in Rhino until the end of the season, if he does a good enough job then offer it on permanent basis.
Andrew James
18 Posted 23/10/2017 at 15:28:33
A cold nearly empty pub in the suburbs of Glasgow. A balding, overweight James McFadden is stood at the bar with a copy of Racing Post and a pint of Tennants.

Enter Moyes.

JM - Gaffer?
DM - Have you heard the news James?
JM - Still no referendum! That Sturgeon needs to act fast...
DM - No James, I'm putting the old team back together.
JM - Really?
DM - Yes, I need you.
JM - Er gaffer, I'm a little over the hill now yer know?
DM - I'll get you fit.
JM - I haven't played in ages...
DM - Nae bother. Remember Charlton James?
JM - Yes. (glazes over)
DM - Remember...remember that step over you did at Plymouth?
JM - Not really no gaffer.
DM - C'mon...Ossie is under lock and key, Kilbane is polishing his Predators and the Yak is renewing his passport.

Nick Entwistle
19 Posted 23/10/2017 at 15:33:03
Who wouldn't want another ten years of 5th 6th and 7th? A couple of semis frown in and qualification from the Europa group stage! Luxury!
Dave White
20 Posted 23/10/2017 at 15:47:57
Nick - My stomach turned as for a second after reading that I thought...mmmm good point! Fuuuuuuuuuccccckkkkkkk!
Dave White
21 Posted 23/10/2017 at 15:51:13
Give the job to big Dunc...I know it would be a car crash but just imagine...forget Dogs of War, it'll be an apocalypse!
Steve Ferns
22 Posted 23/10/2017 at 16:20:51
I'm with those who think Ferguson should be ushered out with the failed regime.
Jay Woods
23 Posted 23/10/2017 at 16:29:10
This is just too much good news in one day. First Koeman out and then Moyes NOT in.

As an Evertonian, my adrenal axis can't take it.

Daniel Lim
24 Posted 23/10/2017 at 16:38:41
Can you continue the story?

Or Andrew, if Christine not able to?

That's much much more interesting than watching football (Everton under RK I mean).

Tony Everan
25 Posted 23/10/2017 at 17:07:44
Moyes's ship has sailed.

Daily Mirror should stop banging on about it , it is complete bullshit. Not many Evertonians would support that at all.

Richard Reeves
26 Posted 23/10/2017 at 17:20:10
I don't understand how after Moshiri's Museum speech Moyes could be an option, not even on a temporary (relegation fight) basis after that terrible defeatest mindset he had at Sunderland.

That was one of the worst displays I have ever seen of any manager.If Moshiri does have a lot of influence and is a man of his word then there's no chance of it happening.

If he even gets an interview I would like to think it's to keep Kenwright and his corner shop set up happy but with no intention of giving him the job.
Tony Rio
27 Posted 23/10/2017 at 17:21:42
Here's my list of managers I would have rather than Moyes; the chuckle brothers, harvey weinstein, Steven Gerrard, joey Essex, Peters and lee (no offence just stating a fact) , fritzl or any member of the tory cabinet. Please please please bill and mosh listen to the majority of evertonians. Anyone any other suggestions? Just thought of emu, of rod hull fame, as things have been a bit quiet for the little fella of late but I'm sure he would give the squad a rocket.
Grant Rorrison
28 Posted 23/10/2017 at 17:34:46
Koeman gone and Moyes not returning. What a time to be alive.
John Hammond
29 Posted 23/10/2017 at 17:52:32
Andrew #18: I remember that game well not only for that goal but because it won me a lot of money!
Mark Melton
30 Posted 23/10/2017 at 18:11:26
The Independent "He is not currently a desired candidate" sounds pretty emphatic to me.
Colin Glassar
31 Posted 23/10/2017 at 18:21:59
Moyes has been spotted in Preston town centre, hands in pockets (playing pocket pool no doubt), head down muttering to himself, “fucking liar that Kenwright. He said I’d be welcome back whenever I wanted to”.
Paul Hay
32 Posted 23/10/2017 at 18:48:01

Have to say that I'm 100% with you on that idea.
BK however, has to be at the top of the list. He is the biggest noose around any dreams or aspiration that supporters of Everton have. Unfortunately for the club, this will only happen when he shakes his mortal coil. Everton can get rid of coaches,managers and replace them as the situation demands - but while that clown remains, then the cancer at the top will always spread eventually.

Andrew James
33 Posted 23/10/2017 at 18:58:25
Finch Farm, Thursday 26th October.

David Moyes first training session with new assistant Steve Round and small group of players including Rooney, Jagielka, Baines, Osman, Barkley, Keane, Davies, Pickford and the Sigg.

DM - Right, some of you know how I work...
WR - Too true boss.
DM - But for those of you who don't, we defend as a team, we get everybody back for corners...
RB - Meh...(wonders about returning that call from London)
DM - And we press!
WR - Really?!

A murmur of excitement around the group.

LB - Did you pick that up in Spain boss?
DM - No, I've always done it.

Cue confused looking Jags, Baines and Osman.

PJ - When?
DM - I call it the reverse press.
PJ - Eh?
DM - In the dying stages when you're leading, you contort the pitch by taking off your striker and then pulling everyone back towards your own area. You make them come onto you.
WR - That sounds like defending deep...
DM - Yes!
WR - And asking for trouble.
DM - Let Steve run a session on it. I've got to call Fellaini. Oh, and when Martinez was here, does anybody know why he messed around with all the trophy frames upstairs and removed my Manager of The Season awards? And why is my Secret mind map room cluttered with golf clubs?

Hurries off with smart phone in hand while James McFadden takes Rooney and the Sigg off for set piece taking practice.

Christine Foster
34 Posted 23/10/2017 at 21:32:13
Finch Farm, Wednesday 3.30pm, the day before .

BK - Hi David, how you settling in again?
DM- Oh no problem Bill, just like I never left, except some of my things are missing
BK- Missing, er, what David?
DM- My whiteboard for a start, and my awards, where did you stash them, in the attic??
BK- Sorry about that David, but we needed space and I am sure we forwarded them on to Manure cough, cough..
DM- Those Bas**ds probably binned them!
BK- Er.. yes, probably.. cough cough
DM- You got a cold Bill?
BK- No, just choking a little, still won't be long before you get another one will it? Whiteboard? Pick one up from Ikea and hold on to the receipt..
DM- Oh, ok..
BK - How is training going? I thought I saw some academy lads running along the A57 this morning on route to Formby..
DM- No thats the first team, I sent them all out to run the sandhills today, unfit the lot of them..
BK- Is that wise? Don't we have a game tonight? Chelsea? Cup match and all?
DM- Its alright Bill, they are all asleep on the coach.. they will feel great when they wake up in London
BK- Ok David, all yours, you know what you are doing..
DM- No problem Bill, oh by the way, can you check if Tim Howard is still available / playing?
BK- Really? why?
DM- Its that Pickford, bad Ju ju.. Sunderland and all, you know.. said he won't play for me again so he is out, not having that in my team! Robles is ok but hurt his back carrying McFadden up the sand dunes, doc says he will be out for a while..
BK- Thats unlucky.. how long a couple of weeks?
DM- Bit longer I am afraid.. something about a cracked spine.. oh and Wayne has a groin strain.. not sure what thats about, other than that we are fine..
If we keep it tight we can nick one..
BK- Hang on David, who is playing in goal?
DK- Bill its ok, I got David James on loan from St Andrews
BK- St Andrews? are they a Scottish club? Rings a bell
DM- No Bill, don't be silly, its a golf course, he collects balls at the driving range so he is pretty fit.. got to go the bus is leaving without me..
BK- David, DAVID...

Alastair Kelly
35 Posted 23/10/2017 at 22:07:00
Surprised by some of the negative comments for BK, whilst not everyone is going to agree with decisions he has had to make over the years there is no doubt his heart is in this club. He' s presided over a tricky period for the club and we're still in top flight. I know many feel he should have sold the club on a long time ago but be careful what you wish for. Now we have a billionaire owner it could be boom and bust from here on in.
Raymond Fox
36 Posted 23/10/2017 at 22:33:25
Very good you two, quite a few gems/laughs in them.
Andrew James
37 Posted 24/10/2017 at 00:12:48

I loved the bit about McFadden...

I was thinking up a bit where Moyes goes to Wayne Rooney's house – obviously a difficult place – to persuade him to be the new defensive midfielder.

Or bringing back Pienaar on the left

David Israel
38 Posted 24/10/2017 at 00:33:32
Let's be fair to the Mirror, folks. It's not their fault if the bookies have him as the favourite. Come to think of it, it probably isn't the bookies' fault, either, but it is all down to the idiots who bet on him, thereby shortening the odds.
Will Mabon
39 Posted 24/10/2017 at 02:45:14
"Who wouldn't want another ten years of 5th, 6th and 7th? A couple of semis thrown in and qualification from the Europa League group stage! Luxury!"

Nick, many a true word spoken in jest, is the phrase.

What you framed there is I believe, very close to the original plan that was envisioned for this new era. At least the first several years of it.

David Ellis
40 Posted 24/10/2017 at 02:57:15
We were in a much bigger hole when Kenwright and Moyes took over the club than we are now. People forget...we were really on the brink of being like Sheffield Wednesday and just disappearing from view.

Now we aren't. Even if we got relegated we would bounce back up because we have the financial resources to do so. Anyway I'm sure we won't go down because we do have some decent players.

And this is why I don't want Moyes back...different times different aspirations...different budget .and frankly I think he has lost confidence.

Laurie Hartley
41 Posted 24/10/2017 at 03:39:40
Well I am glad that rumour has been squashed.
Daniel Lim
42 Posted 24/10/2017 at 06:04:46
I came back to this thread to read your stories, Andrew and Christine. Thanks.

Lyndon, or Mike, can we have a separate thread called "Story Telling"?
It's hard some times to recall in which thread the stories are.

David Pearl
43 Posted 24/10/2017 at 06:41:56
Well if it was a choice between Koeman and Moyes I’d go with DM all the way. He bought in Baines, Pienaar, Arteta, Cahil, Jags, Distin... oh and Marcus Bent to replace Rooney (and we finished 4th).

Unsy will get the job it’s too obvious. Maybe he should leave the first team in the stands v Chelsea and play his -23s. I can’t get over the amount of money we have spent on going backwards.

Cindy Cole
44 Posted 24/10/2017 at 07:22:43
A choice between Koeman and Moyes, what could possibly be worse?

David Moyes meets Ronald Koeman who has now joined him on gardening duty in the grounds of the asylum

RK: That's gardening, OK. Sometimes you have to change things. I told Walsh no more flowers, they are too showy. I need more trees. Trees are big and strong. They have more productivity. So I dig a hole and plant lots of trees in it.
DM: I didnae have many trees. I built a wall and put all tha plants behind it. I threw some bulbs o'er tha wall an' ran like crazy.
RK: Well OK so the trees fell over. You can't win Chelsea flower show if your trees keep falling over. But they pressed. They pressed onto the building next door and it collapsed. So we dominated. We dominated the neighbourhood.
DM: I took me prunin' knife an' I fought aginst extendable tree loppers until the wee hours. But it was such a small garden I couldnae grow anything. An' me tracky bottoms got snagged on tha' roses.
RK: It's not the time to be crazy. I still think I am the right man to grow more trees. If a tree doesn't want to grow here then OK it can go and grow somewhere else. That's normal because that's gardening.
DM: I thought tha' grass was greener doon tha' road but I still couldnae grow anything. It wasnae fair. this point both men are ushered back to their padded cells. En route they pass Martinez.

Nurse: Dr Martinez, I have a Mr Moshiri on the phone for you.

Will Mabon
45 Posted 24/10/2017 at 07:42:31
Good finish, Cindy. That's just the way it would be, Moyes and Koeman found out, Martinez coming up smelling of roses.
Dave Wilson
46 Posted 24/10/2017 at 16:35:55
Not sure why so many are objecting. He is highly unlikely to apply. but like him or, He did a better job than the two who followed him.
Soren Moyer
47 Posted 24/10/2017 at 19:51:55
Thank you god!
Andy Crooks
48 Posted 24/10/2017 at 19:57:31
I think parody of David Moyes should be left to Eugene Ruane.
Joe McMahon
49 Posted 24/10/2017 at 20:09:16
Dave Wilson - I'm sure Man United, Real Sociedad and Sunderland fans don't hold him in a high regard as you do.

Being honest I think 11 years at Everton and winning nothing says to some us no thanks.
Eugene Ruane
50 Posted 24/10/2017 at 20:23:27
Dave # 46 - '..but like him or, He did a better job than the two who followed him'

Well that's debatable, they all won fuck-all, but he had 11 (EE-LE-VEN!) years trying.

Plus, as annoying as Martinez became, his first season in charge gave us our highest PL points tally.

Hobson's choice maybe, but I think Moyes' limitations are plainly there for all to see now (specially as he hasn't got fat-head 'bigging him up' every 5 mins).

Barry Williams
51 Posted 25/10/2017 at 03:09:25
Why believe or comment on the validity of anything in a tabloid?

I do not want Moyes back, but for all the negativity, a lot of it justified, in the bigger picture, where would Everton be today without him?

Max Fine
52 Posted 25/10/2017 at 03:17:32
IMO Moyes legacy is the defeatist attitude that still lingers around some quarters of the club, and is responsible for results like that at city; 0-1 up playing ten men and we still went out in the second half scared shitless and with the attitude that we weren’t good enough to attack Pep’s mighty city. So it’s definitely a resounding “no” from me.
In fact every time I see one of our forwards by the corner flag having run the channels to get there, a shudder from the ghost of Moyes’-football past is sent down my spine...please please never again [shudders]
David Ellis
53 Posted 25/10/2017 at 03:35:17
Max Fine 52 .you thought Moyes was defeatist...what about Walter Smith? Moyes was a breath of fresh air in comparison. The defeatist attitude pre-dates Moyes so isn't his legacy.

It's actually the legacy of the withdrawal of the Moores family money, Heyzel and the creation of the Premier League all at the wrong time for Everton. Forces far greater than Moyes (or Walter Smith or Kenwright or Agent Johnson).

With Moshiri and Bramley Moore these off field forces are now working a bit more in our favour.

Geoff Evans
54 Posted 25/10/2017 at 19:33:46
David Moyes did a good job but his time has been and gone. Time to look elsewhere. Never go back only forward.

Give Rino a chance, he's done a good job with the youngsters and he's a true blue who understands the club and its supporters.

John Smith
55 Posted 27/10/2017 at 13:39:18
I'll never understand some EFC fan's loyalty to the ginger minge who:

1) repeatedly sent out a B team against Liverpool.
2) ridiculed his own players with his famous "knife to a gunfight" comment.
3) tried to buy Baines and Fellaini for a pittance.

Terry Underwood
56 Posted 28/10/2017 at 16:24:33
Altogether now... "He's got grey hair, we put it there!"
Soren Moyer
57 Posted 28/10/2017 at 17:17:49
Terry Underwood
58 Posted 29/10/2017 at 10:43:16
Agree with previous posts...NEVER go back.. Remember Howard Kendall?
Davie Turner
59 Posted 29/10/2017 at 21:51:08
Newspaper Gossip that made me laugh today

Source: Major Media Corporation's column summing up other media companies made up stuff

Story 1: BK wants Unsworth to have a run as manager

Story 2: Moshiri doesn't want Unsworth but a bigger name, presumably with more than 9 letters in it

Story 3: Everton to approach Big Sam Allardyce as though it only 7 letters it has Big at the start

Colin Glassar
60 Posted 29/10/2017 at 21:59:12

Story 4: After a Moshiri requested exorcism, Kenwright and his fellow ghouls were seen fleeing Goodison this evening.

Soren Moyer
61 Posted 30/10/2017 at 17:13:58
You forgot the Alexis Sanches story.
Christine Foster
62 Posted 30/10/2017 at 18:00:02
The vampires and ghouls are laughing in the boardroom at Goodison, and its not even Halloween..
Phone rings...
BK- Hello David, what can I do for you?
DM- What? I thought we had an agreement? Now I read you have approached that Alladyce bloke, he will win you nothing!
BK- Well actually David, thats not true..
DM- What was the last thing he ever won? I Mean..
BK- David you have the wrong end of the stick again, we haven't approached him its just the media, you know how it works..
DM- Yes but I am sitting waiting for you to call, I watched the Leicester game yesterday, no way can you continue with Unsworth, nice lad but no strategy, no experience..
BK- Well he may need help..
DM- What to find the Exit?
BK- No, he does have the experience of getting clubs out of the crap,, David, What can I do for you?
DM- Look Bill, we had an agreement..
BK- Well we had a discussion..
DM- Discussion? You said there would be no problem, I was your number one choice, you would confirm it after the Leicester game.. you said.. Aren't you making the decisions anymore?
BK- Its a bit complicated, I have to keep Moshiri happy, you know with all the money he spent, I have to let him think he owns the club, but he is as green as grass..
DM- You mean you made a mug out of him?
BK- No, didn't say that David and its a bit naughty you should say that, no wonder he doesn't like you..
DM- Oh I see, so your not making the decisions now.. just let him know I come cheap, that should make him happy
BK- Would you work as No2 with Unsworth? I mean he does need help and it is a way back into management
DM- A way back? you cheeky sod, I could have taken the Scotland job! Still can!
BK- Yes but we all know that will be the end of your career, what better way to show you still have what it takes to run a Premiership club than showing him the ropes? Of course we can't make it official, purely advisory..
DM- Advisory!! Let me advise you for a minute you two faced,
Bill.. you still there Bill? You .

Bill sighs, deletes David Moyes from his contact list and shouts.. "Jenny, can you get me Sam Alladyce on the phone?"

Damien McKay
63 Posted 31/10/2017 at 13:05:30
Phew!! TFFT

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