Nothing to do with my contract, says Moyes

, Liverpool Echo , 11 March, 77comments  |  Jump to most recent
DAVID MOYES admitted he must accept a share of the blame for Everton FC's woeful FA Cup quarter-final defeat by Wigan

“People would always draw conclusions about my contract situation, or the fact I have been here for more than a decade,” said Moyes.

“But anybody who watched that game will know it had nothing to do with that. It was just a poor performance by myself and the Everton team. It wasn't anything to do with anything else. I actually got a feeling that the supporters realised it was just a bad day. We just didn't play well. It wasn't as if it was something tactically we did.

“Throughout you saw misplaced passes, bad control, not winning a race, a challenge or a header in the box. It was a performance I've not seen from my team for quite a while.

“I've always known what I need to do to move it forward. A lot of those things get apparent.

“A lot of supporters and sports writers as well don't always maybe see it. As the season goes on those frailties start to show up more and more.

“People start to notice them. We're quite good at covering a lot of them up through the years.

“We considered all the different permutations that Wigan could play and tried to make sure we covered all bases.

“But really we didn't come up to scratch no matter what way we played, and I don't think there was a great deal I could have made different.”

Quotes or other material sourced from Liverpool Echo



Reader Comments (77)

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Ken Buckley
1 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:10:02
The players minds were visibly not on the job in hand. This will enevitably result in speculation as to why especially as it was a game to reach Wembley and Euro qualification. Something was patently wrong throughtout. As we will probably as fans never get to know what, I can only suggest the clubs spin doctors get to work PDQ. What with that lot Sat and season ticket renewals landing through the post this am a protest will not need organising, it will just happen and they are the worst kinds of protest for any organisation.
Peter Mills
2 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:20:13
"We covered all the permutations that Wigan could play and tried to make sure we covered all bases". Apart from the one where they get most of their team behind the ball, press our players and counter-attack with speed and aggression. And unfortunately, due to all that base covering, we didn't have much time left to consider how we ourselves might play.
Dean Adams
3 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:22:44
Well, if you cant see what you could have done differently, then there is little point in you staying. There must be thousands who would have had Gibson and Felliani in the middle and if you had to play Nev then he should have been at right back with Coleman moved forward, Mirallas inthe middle with Nuts on the left. That would have given us strength and balance. The ability to attack is paramount Davey. That is why your days should be numbered, you fail to see the glaringly obvious.
Colin Wainwright
4 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:29:31
Jesus, Mary and Josephine! He (still) can't see what he could have done differently. I know he's not going to talk tactics with the Echo.....but still.

Worth every penny, Davie.

Steve Guy
5 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:31:05
(Sic) " I was so worried about the opposition (Wigan !) that I didn't have time to think about how we might win ourselves". DM,if you are going to spout this stuff please do it in a soundproof room so we don't have to listen to it. Also a "bad day at the office" line doesn't cut it either. Saturday has been coming for ages; it's not all your fault, the Board are culpable for failing to fund new players in January, so stop covering for them and stop patronising the supporters.
Barry Rathbone
6 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:26:34
He's David Brent, a junior manager bullshit merchant who outlines the problems somehow convincing himself that he's presenting solutions.

It's the same territory as last year when he boasted he'd "do it again" regarding the anfield debacle - if not Brent certainly Nero.

Stephen Doyle
7 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:39:54
These comments along with the supposed interview that our club captain has just given to TALKSPORT - ' 10th place is a magnificent achievement for a club like Everton' are just so depressing and a confirmation of the 'mediocrity will do' attitude from board to the players.
Paul Johnson
9 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:39:54
Problem all round is that the man is so arrogant that he thinks he is doing us all a favour managing our great club.

I read this article in the Echo and there is a link to an article in the Daily Post where Moyes said a European slot will depend wether he stays or goes. I didn't read anything after the headline but, however you want to spin it, he believes that there is a queue of suitors waiting for him.

He cannot see his own failings, I would probably have given him begrudging respect if he had admitted he got it wrong on Saturday. With his selection and then wasting time before making the sub at half time. But no, he can't even do that — pure arrogance.

David Moore
10 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:47:45
If Neville said that, he should be out the door as fast as anyone can get a boot up his arse.
Roman Sidey
11 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:51:49
Barry, as a scholar of the classics, and fan of the historic villains, comparing Moyes to Nero is a massive insult to the clapped out Roman. I appreciate he burnt the city and took no blame, but at least he entertained people while it was going on. Moyes is simply standing there with the box of matches doing his best Bart Simpson, "I didn't do it."
Tony Hanlon
12 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:43:56
Phil Neville on Sky sports as just said all the squad want Moyes to sign a new long term contract. Sure you do Phil , no other manager would employ you.
Doubt all the squad are behind him (Vellios,Barkley,Duffy,) to name a few.
Listening to various phone-ins , websites I would say about 85% of fans want Moyes out. This is not a one game knee-jerk reaction , there has been a steady increase in no confidence in Moyes for years. Birmingham Oldham Reading & Wigan have knocked Everton out of the FA cup in the last 6 years. ALL at Goodison.Fellow Tofeewebers let the media know , we want MOYES out
Mohammed Horoub
13 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:40:02
"...I don't think there was a great deal I could have made different.”

No actually there was alot:
- Signed a 1 year extension on Feb 1st to put the player's mind at ease
- Asked BK to insert an escape clause in the contract just incase a CL team came calling in the summer. (We would also hear the news of Hell freezing over)
- Started rotating the players to keep most people fresh for the run in
- Use one of atleast a dozen formations which have been mentioned on TW the last few days
- Used your 3 subs at halftime to try and inspire a comeback

Regardless where we finish in the league I hope we get a change in the summer. His interview above is delusional and doesn't reflect a healthy state of mind.

When Spurs sacked Redknapp I really thought they would take a few years to recover but AVB proves that it's all about finding the right combination of Manager and Players. He's the same person who managed Chelsea but because he won the players over they are playing well. I always appreciate when I see any player score a goal and then run over to the manager to celebrate. It reflects the respect of leadership and it flows through the whole team.

Maybe the future is uncertain but I am sure of one thing: There's a Manager out there who can work with our current squad (maybe with a few additions in the summer) and hopefully bring home a Cup in the next few years.

Kevin Jones
14 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:36:32
So you had a bad day hey Davey. Now whilst I wouldn't advocate this for everybody, because most of us live on planet normal, why don't you just dock yourself a days pay. That's only £9285.74 based on a 7 day week, or only £13.000 based on a 5 day. Based on 40 Hours, as if anyone in football works 40 fucking hours, it's £1625.00 Per hour.

Now on £13,000, If an average season ticket cost £600.00, then that's 21.66 Season tickets we can give out free, to the longest serving 21.66 season ticket holders. Better known as True Evertonians or suckers, you choose

On £9258.74, same average gives 15.47 free season tickets we can give out.

Now if we docked the all the players Steve Round prick, Alan Stubbs defender, Davey Weir defender, Jimmy Lumbsten fuck knows, Chris Fucking Woods (God that man fucking riles me aaaaarrrrrrgh ) Goalkeeper,and any other backroom member, we'd probably be able to give about 4,000 Season tickets out and I could possibly be one of those.

So I won't renew, I'll just expect a nice letter from Mr.Elestone / Moyes / Kenwright, apologising for Saturday, and a brand spanking New Season ticket for next season.

Bill Gall
15 Posted 11/03/2013 at 16:37:13
As I previously commented, after Wigan's third goal, there was still 1 hour left in the game but David Moyes just stood there and done nothing waiting for half time. Everyone in the crowd new something should be done and even the TV commentators expected some changes made.

Even as poor as the team was playing, Moyes should've moved Neville to right back, dropped Fellaini into defensive midfield and pushed Coleman further forward... and if it didn't help, then at half-time, make changes. Standing there with his arms folded showed a complete lack of leadership when it was needed and reinforced rightly so the criticism he is getting.

Praise should be shown to Wigan who simply took care of what was in front of them with no significant changes made against them.

I definitely agree with the supporters who also are critical of the insipid board who remind me of an old saying, "Nero fiddled while Rome burned".

Also to the players before you are privileged to put on an Everton shirt have a look at Dave Hickson's video and see what a true professional is made of.

One more thing before you make quotes to the media — another quote in North America: "Before you talk the talk, you have to be able to walk the walk."

Phil Sammon
16 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:16:55
Fucking hell, that had me laughing, Kevin.
Eugene Ruane
17 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:13:05
Kevin (073), based on your clarity of thought and obvious ability to see the big(ger) picture, I wouldn't give you a free season ticket, I'd make you manager.
Tony Hanlon
18 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:15:10
When Liverpool fans chanted 11 more years at the derby surely Moyes must have got the message.You are one lucky man who is no better a manager the the usual journeymen managers - you just got lucky with a shitbag chairman.
Still waiting for the big boys to phone Dave.
Tony J Williams
19 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:18:29
That would be nice Kevin, how do I get my name of the list of 4,000?
Richard Reeves
20 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:28:57
This is Moyes going on the charm offensive.

I'm sure he reads ToffeeWeb....

Max Murphy
21 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:40:30
Roman @61 - superb! Nero for our next manager!
Patrick Murphy
22 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:54:09
Brian McDermott is now available following his departure from Reading
Michael Williams
23 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:49:56
So you had a bad day.....FFS....how the other half lives.

I was up at 0445 to get my lift to the match, paid my 38 quid for the ticket and and another 25 odd for the lift...watched the dross....broke down for the best part of 3 hours on way home on the M5 and to cap it all hit a freaking badger just outside of Bath in my car..........yup just a bad day at the office, though I do not think the badger saw it that way!

Just perhaps if you were to donate a couple of minutes of your pay I could fix the car in time for me to go through the same nonsense on Saturday?

Barry Rathbone
24 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:01:52
Roman you are right, the least Moyes could do is entertain us with a tune as per Emporer Nero - anyone know where he could get a fiddle?
Brian Hill
25 Posted 11/03/2013 at 17:32:20
Just saw that garbage from Neville. Of course the squad wants him to stay: If you became Everton manager tomorrow how many of the present squad would you retain?

They, the players, know that they owe their millionaire status to David Moyes and, by extension, the clown Kenwright.

I wouldn't have players like Osman, Howard, Anichebe, Neville or Heitinga in my Subbuteo team, yet Moyes sees them as indispensable.

David Moyes will achieve nothing after Everton, he has achieved next to nothing with Everton. His defenders compare him to Smith and Walker, neither of which comparisons are truly valid, as one came from Rangers, competing in a a two horse town, the other an act of true desperation.

Others compare him to Gordon Lee, who provided one of the most exciting Everton teams I have ever seen, and who was sacked soon after. Latchford, Thomas, King, Dobson, any complaints?

Eugene, if you are reading, I think you said on another thread that we are used to Moyes and are scared of change. You are so right.

Thanks David Moyes, but it is time to go.

Paul Andrews
26 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:13:07
"Throughout you saw misplaced passes,bad control,not winning a race,a challenge or a header in the box.It is a performance I have not seen from my team for quite a while"

Good to see you only do your finger pointing in the dressing room David, never in public.

Paul David
27 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:34:59
McDermott has been sacked, Moyes can fuck off to Reading.
Kunal Desai
28 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:27:05
We covered all permutations?? is this fella for real? who the fuck is he trying to kid. How about I cannot get my team to defend set pieces and the goals we've leaked this season. Guess he never covered for that pernutation.
Mark Jensen
29 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:38:11
So, so frustrated.
This has been coming.
Ageing squad, poor tactics, players with no confidence being picked week in week out, young hungry players being overlooked (i would accept mediocrity if it came with a slice of enthusiasm).

Still, I'll wait until the end of the season before venting my full anger.

Remember the 8-1 defeat to Arsenal a few years back and the 3-0 defeat last season to one of the worst Red Shite teams I have ever seen!
There are plenty more embarrassments before the end of the season, mark my words.

Jeff Beaumont
30 Posted 11/03/2013 at 18:40:25
What about the approx £2 million loss of gate receipts & prize money that this debacle has cost the Club?
Colin Glassar
31 Posted 11/03/2013 at 19:15:49
I think Moyes is now realising there is nothing out there for him. Definitely not a top 4 team and I doubt a top 8 team. So his only options are staying with Everton (hope not) or moving abroad to some Dutch team or 2nd rate German side.
John Brennan
32 Posted 11/03/2013 at 19:36:18
Saturday was it for me. Same old, same old. I really thought we would go forward to the semis, but nothing. I was deeply, deeply disappointed with our attitude. We weren't just poor, we were bloody awful.

I gave no one any points at all, apart, perhaps, from Mirallas who at least appeared to be trying. It's the same old shit, regardless of which competition we are in, we all know which team he wil put out, and how they will play.

Why do we have Hitlzelsperger on the bench (okay, he might not be where he was 10 years ago, but I'm not asking him to take on Barcelona), and ditto with Oviedo? Why pay these guys if all the fans ever see of them is warming up prior to being given a run out 5 minutes before the end?

Thanks very much for what you have done, David, but my feeling is that you lack inspiration and the ability to develop ideas anywhere near those of the inspirational coaches in Europe. (No, I won't name them, I've no idea who they are, but you only have to watch Spanish and Bundesliga football to be drawn to a particular coach or other).

There may be a few British coaches who could do a damn good job over the next few years (I don't think we lack the knowledge we once had). We are slow to react, repeat the same old mistakes, fail to learn from goals conceded (ie, free kicks and corners where we seem to panic), and are far, far too slow to counter attack because we have everyone back defending.

Paul Andrews
33 Posted 11/03/2013 at 20:47:53
"It wasn't as if it was something tactically we did"

No David it was something tactically you DIDN'T do.

Brian Waring
34 Posted 11/03/2013 at 21:29:26
“We considered all the different permutations that Wigan could play and tried to make sure we covered all bases.

So, he was more worried what Wigan could do to us?

Roman Sidey
35 Posted 11/03/2013 at 21:33:25
Typical shite, isn't it, Brian? We play a team near the bottom of the table and Moyes pays them too much respect and tries to stifle what THEY will do to US. It's clear that in Moyes eyes we've gone from being "The Peoples' Club" to "My Little Football Team".
Gary Jones
36 Posted 11/03/2013 at 21:36:07
Paul (#234),

My thoughts exactly: "It wasn't as if it was something tactically we did or didn't do" — a statement like that from a pro manager unbelievable, I think the fella needs some counselling, poor lad.

Here's one while I'm on: Our glorious leader to change places with Wenger, at least he would give the kids a go, and Felliini to Man Utd and Rooney back were he should be... just a thought???

Brian Waring
37 Posted 11/03/2013 at 22:10:00
Thats one off the problems Roman, Moyes has gone from the 'People's club' line,to everything just being about him. At the end of the day we owe him fuck - all, he owes us.
Mike Dyson
38 Posted 11/03/2013 at 22:07:58
Well, Mystic Dave tried to cover all the Wigan bases apart from the one that stops them scoring goals. Any important game, he shits it and goes defensive. When nothing to play for, we attack; 4-4 against Man Utd – would that have happened if we were in the top 4 at the time? No chance!

Supporters realised it was a bad day at the office – no, it was a fecking awful shite performance from a team that could not be arsed putting in a shift.

Darren Alexander
39 Posted 11/03/2013 at 22:20:42
"I actually got a feeling that the supporters realised it was just a bad day."

Well, I didn't realise that, and haven't encountered anyone either on here or in the real world who felt that.

This wasn't like the day we peppered the Fulham goal only for them to equalise with the last kick of the ball... there was no element of bad luck, or being hard done by here. We were well beaten at home by a side who in the main - and as their league position shows - are poor. Mistakes with selection, tactics and substitutions, plus a lack of spirit that starts with the manager, were responsible. Nothing more or less.

Yes, Moyesy, while it sure was a bad day (you think?), it can't simply be said to be just a bad day.

John Crawley
40 Posted 11/03/2013 at 23:14:07
Arrogant, deluded and complacent. Time to make our feelings known inside the ground I think.
Susong Hermawan
41 Posted 12/03/2013 at 03:42:27
Just leave DM... we're fucking bored with your defensive style of play and please take your lovely PN and LO with!
Paul Gladwell
42 Posted 12/03/2013 at 07:29:45
Someone on Collumore last night reminded us about how Moyes blamed the Lescott contract debacle on our poor start, I bet Lescott is laughing his bollocks off as Moyes denies his contract issue is having no affect on our downward spiral since his 'I will see how we do in the top four and cup first' shout.
James Stewart
43 Posted 12/03/2013 at 09:39:46
Bullshit
James Martin
44 Posted 12/03/2013 at 09:41:21
Months ago lots of people were calling for Moyes to do exactly this and put pressure on Kenwright and the board by not signing a contract, for the first few weeks when he announced it and we were playing well some people were applauding him for doing this to try and get money out of them in January. Now that we're playing badly you've all changed your tune. He could have signed it at the beginning of the season (whether you want him to or not) and he would have been panned by most of you for not 'rocking the boat' or allowing Kenwirght to get away with the bare minimum.
John Daley
45 Posted 12/03/2013 at 10:27:46
"Months ago lots of people were calling for Moyes to do exactly this and put pressure on Kenwright and the board .....Now that we're playing badly you've all changed your tune".

Even if that was the case didn't he claim he was waiting until January before holding talks? Now it's the end of the season & a load of waffle about how it'll only take 5 minutes to sit down & discuss it. Longer than the 4 minutes it took for his team to capitulate on Saturday I suppose.

Also, why would anyone automatically presume his contract stance is in anyway designed to signal disgruntlement, or put pressure on Kenwright or the board? He was still bigging up Bill & (totally unprompted) proclaiming him to be 'a brilliant chairman' in an interview with Martin Keown as recently as last Friday. He's done that persistently throughout his tenure, which just makes him look like an utter twat when he consequently gets a titty lip on about a lack of transfer funds.

James Martin
46 Posted 12/03/2013 at 10:47:19
Yes he did John and then January came and went and how many players of note did we get in? Did anything happen there to convince him that it was worth him signing a new contract? he may as well keep the pressure on until the summer in the hope that it may start a few wheels turning somewhere in the board room. Unfortunately its undoubtedly affecting both his and the players performance. If he lets up though and signs all it says is to continue with the status quo to Kenwright who has bought himself a couple more years of premier league survival.
Paul David
47 Posted 12/03/2013 at 10:55:16
James

I bet most people who were saying Moyes was doing the right thing by using his contract to put pressure on the board were Moyes supporters. Others like myself have always thought this was nothing more than Moyes running down his contract because he thinks he is better than us and would into a CL job. Deluded.

Brian Waring
48 Posted 12/03/2013 at 16:35:05
Just like the last time James when it came to signing a new contract, there were lads then saying Moyes was stalling to put pressure on the board, well, he did put pressure on the board, and came out of it with a bumper pay rise.
Vince Furnier
49 Posted 12/03/2013 at 17:21:00
"We considered all the different permutations that Wigan could play and tried to make sure we covered all bases"

Says it all for me really. Instead of being proactive and devising a single winning strategy, he focuses on a strategy that tries to mitigate every possible Wigan permutation. No wonder he's a loser.

Wayne Smyth
50 Posted 12/03/2013 at 17:26:09
All this bollocks about money or the board being at fault is laughable, since we just got our arses handed to us by a team built for a fraction of what Moyes team cost to assemble and maintain.

I'm not saying the board couldn't do better, because we all know Everton have been badly mis-managed, but to put the Wigan performance or result down to anything other than the manager and players is ridiculous.

Moyes contract stalling and posturing has certainly badly backfired - despite what he or his fucking inept parrot of a captain might say. But truth be told, he was never going to win anything regardless. He's always mentally bottled it and it's clear from the last 4 or 5 years that he struggles to motivate the team for a full season.

Good riddance when he goes, hopefully the sooner the better.

Frida Ericsson
51 Posted 12/03/2013 at 17:10:16
James Martin, It really doesn't / did not matter if he signed a contract, because we could just run him him out of town anyway. really don't see the problem from that point of view.
A few / minority applauding moyes, is far from being the majority who did not.
the last 3 or 4 years things have gotten worse under him.

read the article from him again, and try telling evertonians he isn't deluded, and all me attitude.

what reaaly gets me is the sweeping statement, I don't know what I could of done better..talking tactics, which proves the point the he is a egomaniac.

it wasn't my fault, arrogant- most evertonians 'realized'?! it was just a bad day...and yet further states he hasn't seen so manymis- placed passes, headers etc...funny that, because this as been going on at least since just before december. and moyes hasn't noticed now during all this time just bad we've been?

he wonders why we are struggling very badly with the amount of players who stink the place out.

the only three id keep next season would be mirallas, baines and pienaar coming on off the bench and i'd try before the end of this season the youngsters ovideo etc. we have nothing to loose but more to gain..we have a good number of matches to have a look at the poor bench warmers..instead we'll be treated to the same lineup at the weekend.

moyes, you are delusional, tactically inept and bigger than this club..you make me embarrssed to be a blue at times...just go and now before the fans end up running you outta town..you said you would leave if we did not want you, your too delusional and egotistical to understand we don't want you..

Frida Ericsson
52 Posted 12/03/2013 at 17:43:00
i am sorry, I meant to say "and you think you are bigger than this club". when you go, the only things I will remember are the huge embarrasing defeat scorelines, particularly in the uefa and europa cups..you are a bottler and will never win a thing in your entire career.
Graham Mockford
53 Posted 12/03/2013 at 18:32:10
Frida

You really are Jimmy Sorheim aren't you? There cannot be two Evertonians with that unique grammatical style. Can you confirm you and Jimmy have been seen in the same room?

Kevin Hudson
54 Posted 12/03/2013 at 18:07:28
Frida,

In your Wild-West haste to have David Moyes "run out of town," you've embroidered your rhetoric with fiction, pardner...

You describe his comments as those of an 'arrogant egomaniac.'

You failed (deliberately) to include his contrite admission that his own performance was as poor as his players. Hardly deluded, and certainly not an arrogant statement.

"The last 3 or 4 things have gotten worse at Everton."

True. We've gone from finishing 5th/ 6th to finishing 7th/ 8th.

(Obviously, we all need grief-counselling to get over this travesty).

Most Evertonians DID realise it was a bad day when three goals were shipped in as many minutes. How often does that phenomenon occur in professional football?

You then claim that Moyes is delusional before demanding a mass clear-out of (wait for it) all but 3 players!!

You finish by telling us that all you remember are the embarrassing Euro thrashings. So let's ignore the big wins we did have, and the number of away wins we enjoyed. Let's avoid mentioning the hammerings we dished out, (6-1 v Larissa, two 4-0 wins, the wins at Kharkiv, Nuremberg, Athens, Brann, Alkmaar, BATE,) and let's also (conveniently) forget that Moyes's men won more than double the amount of Uefa Cup games that they lost.

You also mistakenly claim that he "will never win a thing in his career." Except, he won a league title with Preston, Frida....and before you scoff at that, please note that it was, in part, something that attracted us to him, and no one was scorning his Preston record when he arrived.

Paul David
55 Posted 12/03/2013 at 18:51:25
Kevin

"Most fans DID realise it was a bad day"

That gives the impression that fans accept it was just 'one of those days', shrug our sholders, right that game off and look forward to the next game.

If that is what you meant then your as deluded as Moyes.

Joe Bibb
56 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:02:39
Season ticket renewal forms make great airplanes — my grandson loves them!
Paul Andrews
57 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:26:40
Kevin,

Unfortunately,the bad days far outweigh the good days under David.

Kevin Hudson
58 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:24:07
Untrue, Paul.

The entire watching public witnessed a freakish collapse in less time than it takes to boil an egg.

It wasn't a case of 'hey-ho, never mind,' at all. It was total disbelief and anger.

Kevin Hudson
59 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:29:13
Paul (Andrews)

Statistically, that's not actually true; But I would agree that the 'painful,' defeats definitely outweigh the 'great,' victories.

Paul David
60 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:43:54
Kevin

Well i'm glad you wasn't being blase about the performance but I still don't think a lot of people thought of it as a bad day at the office.

Eugene Ruane
61 Posted 12/03/2013 at 18:35:23
Seen a couple of posts in the last couple of days wondering if Moyes reads TW.

Imagine if he did...

Open on a house, then close-up of a wooden sign on a gate - 'Bonnie L'ang Forrd'

Cut to inside the house, we see a cushion that reads 'Be it ever so humble, there's nae place like hame'

It's Saturday night at we're at Davie's gaff.

Morag: "Yer Dad will be hame soon, so switch awf that telly and make yersel scarce".

The bairns: "Awww MAAA! We're watchin' oor Songs O' Praise DVD!!"

Morag: "I'll Songs O' Praise YOU if yer no careful - awa t' yer bedrooms, the NOO!"

Sfx: "Front door slam!"

Moyes: (muttering) "Of aw th'nasty ungrateful....Some o' them were actually booing me.....ME!! Eleven years ave give t' them. Ave sweated buckets, run my blood tae water and apart fae 20 million poond, fet WHIT? I'll tell ye whit - tae be questioned by a bunch o' snot nosed.....

Morag: "Och stop it David, sit yersel doon, yer'll ainly get wan o' yer headaches, I'll make us a nice cup o' tea".

Morag goes to the kitchen, Moyes logs on to his computer (using Windaes).

Morag returns with tea and a plate of ginger snaps.

Morag; "Awww DAVID! How many times!? Stay AWA' fae Toffeeweb! Yer blood pressure will be through the roof!"

Moyes: "Just a quick look to get an idea, ah need tae keep mah fingers oan th'pulse"

Morag looks over his shoulder at the screen

Morag: "There's a nice one, whit's his name? Entwhistle! That's very complimentary sure it is...and look at the wan after that, that's even better - a guy called Dodd. See, I telt ye the majority would back you - noo put that thing awa and come tae bed, it's almost eight!

Moyes closes the computer and smiles.

Moyes: "Maybe yer right love, looks like ah dae still have the backin' o' most"

Morag: "Course yer dae love, sure next week they'll be singin' that wee red-hair song again and everythin' will be back tae normal"

They head upstairs - Moyes switches downstairs lights off.

Moyes: "Jings, It's lit up like Peebles high street in here, lights cost money hen"

Morag tuts (fade to black)

We then cut to the kids in a dark bedroom looking at a computer screen.

Wee Sandy: "Well there's wan or twa here that seem tae think he's no too bad.......but everyone else seems tae think he's a c**t"

Fade

John Keating
62 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:54:00
Good one Eugene !
Brian Morgan
63 Posted 12/03/2013 at 19:58:17
We've been as bad on and off all season. I was at Reading and even after we scored you just knew we were going to lose to the worst team in the Premier League.
Andy Crooks
64 Posted 12/03/2013 at 20:10:38
"It's lit up like Peebles high street in here". Truly brilliant stuff.
Barry Thompson
65 Posted 12/03/2013 at 20:29:50
Pissed meself laughing at Eugenes' post. Absolute classic Mr Ruane. Takes me back to the days of the "Broons" strip on a Sunday morning.
Paul Andrews
66 Posted 12/03/2013 at 20:32:39
Kevin,

Give us a brief idea of what you think we're the good times.

Graham Mockford
67 Posted 12/03/2013 at 20:49:51
Barry

It took me back to the days of 'Mind Your Language', those days when we found racial stereotyping funny.

Gavin Fennessy
68 Posted 12/03/2013 at 20:58:20
Great stuff Eugene!
Nick Entwistle
69 Posted 12/03/2013 at 21:23:30
You need to work in a Moyes catchphrase to your skits, Eugene. Peebles HS was the best.
Si Cooper
70 Posted 12/03/2013 at 21:40:13
It may be a stereotype Graham, but it is not a racial one unless you think Eugene thinks all Scottish people are like that. It is a play on DM supposedly being 'dour ' and 'Presbyterian'.

The other day there was a journalist on a Radio 5 football segment who stated that Moyes had said off the record (as long ago as before this season started) that he had taken the team as far as he could. The implication (supplied by Moyes or the journalist, I do not know) was that he had outgrown the club and could only progress if he moved on somewhere else (bigger?).

Barring the miracle of a top three finish without having to invest in new players, I honestly don't think the manager had any intention of signing a new contract unless he was 100% sure it was in his best interests, and he is merely hedging his bets at the moment.

I agree that the statements above are largely delusional; almost as if the manager didn't notice the early leavers, hear the boos at the end, or the deserved applause for the Wigan side 9and their manager).

Many of us wouldn't have utilised the same personnel that he did on Saturday precisely because we would have expected our central midfield to struggle. The fact that he cannot see that, I find flabbergasting. If anyone dares to come on and declare that highly paid managers ALWAYS know better than us mere mortals, then I might just lose it altogether.

John Gant
71 Posted 12/03/2013 at 21:50:42
Eugene, your best by miles.
Eugene Ruane
72 Posted 12/03/2013 at 23:43:32
Graham Mockford (591) – When 'WE' found racial stereotyping funny? You might have found Mind Your Language Funny, I've had bed-sores that provided more laughs. As for 'racial' – talk about clutching at straws. I don't remember any complaints 'EVER' in Scotland about 'The Broons' or 'Oor Wullie' which were written in EXACTLY the same style. I also don't remember any suggestion they were 'racially' offensive (probably because Scottish isn't a racial group).

By the way, ever heard of Irvine Welsh? – "Choose us. Choose life. Choose mortgage payments; choose washing machines; choose cars; choose sitting oan a couch watching mind-numbing and spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fuckin junk food intae yir mooth. Choose rotting away, pishing and shiteing yersel in a home, a total fuckin embarrassment tae the selfish, fucked-up brats ye've produced. Choose life" -– Guess where he's from?

Andy Crooks
73 Posted 13/03/2013 at 00:29:39
Graham, I think you need to pop in to the "Scowl and Frown" and have a beer. You have missed the point by a million miles.
Ross Edwards
74 Posted 13/03/2013 at 13:22:30
Moyes is never going to blame himself, let's be honest. He thinks that he is untouchable with the media and "True Blue" Bill up his backside. He also thinks that the majority of the fans support him and that we are happy with consistent 7th place finishes and rollovers in big games. Well, I'm sorry Davey that is pure delusion. With spin and delusion like that you wouldn't be out of place in Syria at the moment.
That performance was unforgiveable and has occured far too many times, and yet "Mr Tactical Genius" thinks he is still tactically sound. He is definately taking the absolute Michael. And Neville, which team does he think we are? Sunderland? We don't want consolidation and Quarter Finals where we rollover consistently, we want to challenge for the Top 4 , and win trophies.
For the City game we should show the world and the club that we don't want this tactically inept clown in charge, by having a protest, because good decent fans who pay a fortune to watch 90 minutes of dire, utter dross every week deserve better.
Moyes out, Martinez or Rijkaard in.
Kevin Hudson
75 Posted 13/03/2013 at 15:42:19
Paul, (582)

For what purpose do you need such a recitation?

Paul Andrews
76 Posted 13/03/2013 at 19:37:49
Kevin,

a recitation is not neccesary.
You can refer to your jottings if that helps.

Kevin Hudson
77 Posted 13/03/2013 at 19:42:50
"A recitation is not necessary."

Then why ask for one then..??

Kev Johnson
78 Posted 14/03/2013 at 13:59:32
Ha-ha! Just read Eugene's 'DM reads TW' post. Priceless.

OK, enough laughter. I have just noticed the TW poll - Do you want David Moyes to renew his contract at Everton this summer? - is currently showing that only 52% want him gone! That's only a tiny majority of fans on what is the most independent minded Everton site around. Even here, nearly half want him to stay. I'm astounded.


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