Premier League – Matchweek 2

Relax, we are far better than either Forest or Blades. Forest 1-0 Blades but don’t bother

Oh dear… Tom Davies only on the bench for Sheffield Utd.

How so?

Excellent strike for Sheffield Utd equalizer.

I thought the whole point of switching games from 3 pm on a Saturday was for putting them on telly? Yet this one is not on telly in the UK...

Michael, it's being played tonight because of the cricket tomorrow afternoon, which starts at 2:30 pm.

Kane off the mark for Bayern.

What cricket is that Rob, England One Day?

Barry,

It's basically criminal that Moyes never snapped up Harry Kane back when he was on loan at Millwall. Anyone with foresight would have known would he would become. Another one that got away thanks to Kenwright's meddling.

The Hundred, Barry.

Trent Rockets v Birmingham Phoenix at Trent bridge. Who thought up these ridiculous names for these teams?

Cheers, Rob,

What would Everton be called? Everton Enigma, Everton Erratics or Everton Erstwhiles?

Kieran @6,

I've never heard that about Kane before, or I've forgotten it, but yes, what a hero he would have been at Goodison.

I only took notice of Kane when the late Harold Mathews kept telling us all, he was a player to watch, that was many moons ago.

Barry 8, Everton Eventually maybe?

Everton Eh!

Barry, Manchester (or Lancashire), are known as Manchester Originals, so naturally we would be Everton Originals!

Nice positive one Neil, unlike my next: Everton Entropic.

I think I'll settle for Everton Electric — and not because we are sometimes shocking.

Ah right, thanks Rob @4. Not a connection I would have made!

Barry Hesketh,

To be clear, there's no evidence Everton ever knew of or had interest in Kane at that time beyond Harold Mathews but I felt like it is something we should blame Kenwright for anyway since he hasn't been blamed for anything in this thread yet.

Kieran @15,

I never know what to believe these days, my memory is so befuddled mostly due to Everton, it's difficult to tell the truth from the myth, but let's blame Billy Boy anyway!

But on a more serious note, it is interesting the current England star man as his likely successor as star man (Bellingham) are both plying their trade overseas.

FFP tightening seems to be affecting even the likes of City now. Hopefully for Southgate's sake the Germans can help Harry to brush up on his penalty-taking before the European Championships.

Kieran #6.

Another 17 Premier League clubs were criminal too!

Deft header by Chris Wood for the winner for Forest. Mind, 8 minutes added time, so could still change.

Very well-executed headed goal by Chris Wood to surely win it for Forest.

Brian 18,

You know why, right? Because what do Premier League clubs do when they need to make a decision? They call Bill Kenwright and ask him what he would do.

Rob, Everton Originals, I like that!

Everton Enemas?

I ended up keeping an eye on the Leeds v West Brom match last night. You could see the difference in standard, although it was an interesting match.

1878 The Originals. That's a brand we should adopt.

I've been thinking about all of this name thing we seem to be attaching to teams across sports. It's almost becoming Americanised.

I think Rugby League started it years ago (Leeds Rhinos etc). But especially with the women's game, we have the Lionesses and the Matildas amongst others. Even with Netball, we have the Roses.

I guess we've always had it in terms of nick-names. The Toffees, the Red Devils, the Magpies and the Red Shite.

I'll stick to Everton, but I do like the Originals.

1878 The Originals should be emblazoned on the entrance to Bramley-Moore Dock so that we see it and everyone sees it as they enter or drive past.

Oh dear. 0-1 Bournemouth. Robertson muffed what was to be a clearance right to a shot just outside the box. Well taken.

Just woke up, what a nice start to the day!

Brighton have Pedro and Ferguson on the bench and we need strikers; how the world has turned.

Ooh. This is getting better. The bearded lady mistimes a challenge outside the box and is carded.

I'm watching proper footy, Dale, Wolves v Brighton.

Fair enough Paul. I'm only watching this on belief that this is the year of the Plopp. Bournemouth are more than holding their own, crowd subdued.

Keep us posted, mate.

Stunning, absolutely world class goal from Mitoma, sensational!

Mitoma literally strolls through the Wolves midfield and defence to score a stunning goal.

Won’t be long before Mitoma moves on from Brighton.

What a player, Rob. 4 cards in the Brighton game so far, new rules are nuts.

It's like the old review of journalists one would see in the 2000s; I watch the Red Shite so you don't have to.
Crowd getting somewhat angry in their support. It's a confused atmosphere at Anfield.

Good to hear, roving reporter Dale Self.

Someone is going to get a needless red card soon, Paul.

Absolutely, Rob, strap in for a long season of cazy cards and crazy 'injury time'.

Great game this, W/B, two attacking skillful well-drilled team with exciting players

Right after a memorial moment for the worker who lost his life, Diaz scores inside the box with some quick thinking. 1-1.

Touch of class by Liverpool for their respect for the poor Evertonian that died following the accident at Bramley-Moore Dock. 👏

Ah bollox, Dale.

27th minute for his age Dale?

Brighton got Mitoma; Wolves have Cunha, both class wide players.

Bournemouth denied a penalty, then Liverpool get one: same old same old.

Yes. And worse. Now the Bournemouth left-back gifts a penalty. Salah blocked but no one there for the rebound and Salah nets. 2-1

Bournemouth could rebound. They have had decent chances on counters.

Corrupt VAR at it again.

Amazing sequence of misses for Wolves. They look really great going forward, a la v Man Utd last week, but keep doing daft things when it comes time to shoot.

Hmm... kinda reminds me of someone else…

Liverpool and penalties, as predictable as Death & Taxes. I've never known such a spawny club in the history of the game.

"Salah, penalty", get ready to see a lot of that this season before he fucks off to Persia.

Surely we'd be known as "Everton That"

What is Bournemouth's nickname - shittygrounders, 'arysneighbours?

Bees 1-0 up Dale, Gordon Honeycombe header

Great solo effort by Mitoma, at least four desperate attempts by Wolves players to trip, kick, foul, drag his shirt and he brushes them all away to finish with a clinical low shot.

I'm sure I saw Ross Barkley do that… once.

How have Wolves not scored in 135 mins of footy? They need Che Everton Adams

Just saw that, Michael. Spectacular in a subtle way. I don't think I've seen a player recover from a pull in stride to pass the ball to a space he bursts toward.

Even opened his body to pull the keeper wide to slot behind him. That was like a highlight from the 90s the way he separated from defenders.

Perhaps these are hopeful signs that teams will play forward a little more, and really go for it, but 31 attempts for Wolves so far this season and still no goals may well induce alternative less profligate tactics.

Estupian: 2-0.

Ooo, and Brighton immediately carpet-bag another. Brilliant again by Mitoma to play it back instead of shoot this time!!!

Looks like game over then.

Estupinian?

I was wondering why Welbeck got the nod over Ferguson or Pedro and I've been seeing why…

Estupinan.

Thanks Rob!

3-0 another brilliant goal.

3-0. Wolves torn apart.

That ball from Ensico!

So we can start playing for draws now and simply mind the goal differential.

Never mind Mitoma, Rob, how much is Estupinan worth; another assist, a goal and a good defender?

Easily another couple here for Brighton. Enciso should have just scored.

4-0

4-0.

March: goals x2... Enciso: assists x2.

Tell us what the score will be tomorrow Rob!

Jeez, too easy isn’t it. Two great passes from Enciso put on a plate for Sully March.

Enciso is the one. Truly gifted from what I’ve seen.

Red Card for Mac Allister.

Soft goal for Brighton to concede.

What for, Dale?

Estupinan goes from 15 to 10 pts in a heartbeat

How do Brighton do it? Incredible.

Over 30 years ago I lived on the South Coast and went to Goldstone ground, there aren't words for the success they have achieved on and off the pitch after nearly folding. Their scouting network is on a different planet to Everton.

And Jota scores.

Shin-high studs-up tackle, Rob.

Late studs to shin tackle. But don't get giddy. Bournemouth keeper just gave away a boxed present for Jota: 3-1.

"Their scouting network is on a different planet to Everton"

To anyone, Joe, not just us.

Bees buzzing Dale, 2-0

Yep, good point Paul!

Three match ban then.

Joe #102, I also lived in Brighton - was at the last ever game at the Goldstone, when ex-Blue Stuart Storer scored to take them off the bottom and put Hereford there on goal difference - who they were away at in the last game of the season - and I was there as well (I would normally try to watch Everton, but IIRC that day was the last game ever at Roker Park, so no chance of getting a ticket).

My boss at the company I worked for was married to the daughter of one of the Dick Knight Consortium - which set them on the way to recovery.

I really enjoyed my time watching them, great bunch of supporters and still got many friends down that way. Watching what they were going through as their then owners (Belotti, Archer) sold the ground, and rendered them homeless was bad enough - makes me less tolerant of what we've been through these last 2-3 decades.

You're doing very nicely if you own a house in Brighton or thereabouts and have a season ticket.

Just been shown the footage of the Liverpool penalty.

Sniper in the Kop? Should have been booked for diving.

Matt, so so true. I only went a couple of times though, I lived in Bournemouth, but yes a few trips to a dump of a ground known as The Dell also. I remember Everton winning (I think 3 - 4). Shearer and Newell on the scoresheet.

Joe #116,

I also did the South Coast games (except Bournemouth). Bournemouth was a bit of a Scouse enclave at the time. The Dell was a bit of a relic, but we lost there the only time I went. Also at the new stadium.

One of the funniest Brighton moments was going to watch a band play in a pub – where Brighton's goalie was the lead guitarist!

Those were the days…

It's Bournemouth's fault. Several big chances to get back in and they took themselves out of it with a man advantage. They could drift into a struggle this season.

And Wolves too, Dale, shocking defence.

Who's our ref tomorrow?

9 extra minutes LOL

Wolves down to 10 men, Matheus Nunez second yellow. One of their better players now suspended against us next week.

Crazy red for Nunes there, one of Wolves' best players.

Bees and Seagulls just carrying on from last season: 3-0 & 4-1.

Paul #121,

Anthony Taylor — don't shoot the messenger.

Oh Jeez Matt, thanks!!!!

There serms to be something about the ascent into the Premier League that can drive your squad but, if you don't turn it over and keep momentum, a ceiling can develop. And even an unwind if the coaching staff doesn't catch it early.

Wolves, Cherries, Forest and maybe even Palace or Fulham could slip this season.

Throw in Luton and Sheffield Utd and we will be absolutely fine, Dale.

Good to hear Nunes got a red. No offence to him but if we lose, as I fear we might, away to Villa, we need all the help we can get for that game. Draw an absolute minimum.

Mitoma cost £2.7 million.

Ché Zach Everton Fred Adams scores again.

I would love to believe that Maddison will help Richarlison get to a place he deserves to be but I don't.

That huge Harry Kane mural looks a tad odd now; Richarlison's place is with us, Dale.

Lost power for the first half. Did Spurs do this in the first half as well? I may have underestimated Postecoglou.

Poor old Richarlison, it just ain't working out, is it?

He looks more miserable than ever.

That was a mild rant. I wonder how much longer before he becomes available.

Paul, I still think he's better playing not 100% uptop. More a slightly wide role.

Spurs look impressive as a unit. I fucking hate it.

He drifts in and out, Joe, doesn't he, when he needs to be one or the other. I can see Spurs getting at least one striker in before the end of the month.

Spurs have been excellent, Dale; Man Utd have looked poor in both games. Maddison makes a difference but what Spurs have also done is get some very good defenders in.

I reckon Richarlison will quit English football at the end of this season.

Spurs need to stop handing out hymn sheets or whatever they're doing, all that trash getting thrown on the pitch isn't a good look.

Ten Hag out!!

Did anyone see Spurs play tonight, free flowing lovely attacking football. They have taken to how the manager wants to play.

Agree Andrew.

Looking at the Man U result, I wonder if they will be looking closer at Onana…

It makes you wonder about how low we have fallen when our star players look very ordinary when they go to a more (currently) successful club. I am talking about Richarlison and Barkley as the most recent examples.
Are we really that far adrift now?

Great play by Foden who's been City's best player so far and a terrific finish by Alavrez who would be nailed on starter in any other club.

Hope the skunks get Battered.

Like you in fantasy footy this week - so far - Hewey!

Gordon has been either wasteful or showing a poor touch but Jeez he runs and runs, no lack of effort. He was much better last week - mind you, every Newcastle player was - but my hunch is that he will not be up there in Geordieville in two years time.

Gordon needs to be subbed, he's on a second yellow and is taking risks.

Shaun @146
It's something Gary Neville was going on about during the commentary at Spuds, he said he didn't think that the United manager fancied McTominay to do the job that was required for United and hence why he didn't look to him as a substitute this evening. Neville didn't mention any particular player that United should buy, but I would think that Onana would be one of many they might consider, if United can raise the necessary funds to go out and buy a midfielder.

On another note, City make the game of football look so easy, still not anywhere near their blistering best, but the technical ability of each and every player is awesome, however, I don't feel they'll win the title this season, because they haven't got that magician type of player available that they've had in the past. Although Foden is some player and if he carries on as he is, he will become an England great, if Southgate ever decides to play him in his best position.

So the new rules are to stop fake fouls… yeah, dramatic falling etc?

You could not make it up, the Liverpool penalty, which of course gets minimal spotlight from absolutely wank officials.

Klopp wants a red card recinded - no surprise there then from Mr Entitled.

"This is a genuine, nailed on case of 'mistaken identity's you'll ever likely to see, a travesty of justice" said an un-named spokesperson in a gravely scottish voice.

VAR obviously having not up dated their notes properly, thought he must've been playing Against the rs, not for them.

The amount of Bournemouths points deduction will be decided by a Independent panel later in the week.
This panel will consist of 3...drawn by lot, from the following 4 candidates; Aldridge, Lee, Souness and Rush.

Typical isn't it. Two games in and Jurgen Slopp is moanin' and groanin' already.

He has most money to spend than most other clubs in the Prem. and still he whines. God only knows what he would be like as a manager of Luton or Sheff.Utd.

I thought Man City looked great. They managed the game well and all of their players are comfortable with the football, making time and space. Newcastle were chasing shadows for a lot of the game. City also work incredibly hard to win possession back, turn the game around and break the lines so well.

Anthony Gordon was lucky to stay on the pitch. I think that's why Howe eventually hooked him. As well as the 33-year-old Kyle Walker schooling him.

It might only have been 1-0, but they were mostly in control.

I'm watching Match of the Day. That Szoboszlai does indeed look a good player. But the Murphy - Shearer Liverpool love fest was cringeworthy.

Not a red card? The player comes in late and high, connecting his studs on the opposition's player's shin not far off his knee. A possible leg breaker. Red all day.

But the cries and expectation were that it will be rescinded. Honestly?

Early days and I never get carried away as all teams look a bit dodgy at this stage of the season. Most are still getting up to speed and finding their feet. You get the sprinters who will eventually run out of steam. You get those who have an early shocker only to recover and finish strongly.

But I'd be worried if I was a Wolves supporter. Not just yesterday, talking to family, they've been selling a lot of their players and the managerial situation was a bit bizarre. It made Everton look like we had a plan.

Man Utd will be an interesting one to watch too, as will Chelsea.

Luton not able to play at home and games postponed. I will have to research, but I am sure that if a club's stadium doesn't reach a standard, they can't play in the higher league? I'm pretty sure if the stadium doesn't meet the standards, the team shouldn't be promoted. Probably one for the more educated on here.

And on Everton. I'm going for Top 10 and that eventual League Cup win (tongue in cheek but genuine hope).

I forgot to mention Foden. What a talent, all 5'-8" of him.

Scholes (5'-6"). Probably one of the best English midfielders I've seen in my life to date… Rooney 5'-8". Peter Reid 5'-7". Tiny Tim about 5'-9".

Sorry, but we do often get obsessed with size, pace and power in this country. Ability, desire, fitness and hard work.

Slow players can compensate by reading the game and anticipation. Less glamorous or capable players will get there through hard work and determination. We shouldn't discount players on size. Judge them on their all-round ability determination and performance. I'll call out Leon Osman, who took a lot of stick over the years.

I keep saying it. Wasted as a pundit. Get to Finch Farm. With Pienaar, although I think the latter is at his favoured place in the Ajax Academy. But never say 'never'.

Danny (156),

Spot on with your praise of Foden, a 10/10 performance there, all over the place, linking everything together, absolutely brilliant.

On the other hand, it wasn't Haaland's night. Last week, he looked like the excellent striker he is; last night, I think Maupay would have scored a couple of those chances!!

Caceido thanking god at the end and Paqueta making the Irons sign to the crowd. Great stuff.

Feck me that was a penalty and then the cheeky twat Party does the waving the yellow in the air at the ref.

Rangers 1-0 PSV. A gift turnover in their box back heel to Sima and golazo.