Ice-cold Goodison sees Blues progress

37,000 sounded like 3,700 from the highest row of the Upper Bullens (don't mention the view) but all that matters is we're in the hat with the Hatters.

Run and you'll live – at least a while. And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take our freedom!

I thought Calvert-Lewin had a fabulous game, he never stops, is an absolute nightmare for opposing centre-backs. The shame is that, for the majority of last night, he was chasing his own flicks, he was that isolated. But he kept Palace's defence occupied. It was noticeable that, when Beto came on, the ball forward came back a lot quicker.

Virginia has been a revelation in the two games against Palace, what a joy it must be for the defence not to have to put up with Pickford's histrionics. Joao just goes quietly about his job – and what a job he has done. I hope we treat him better than Arsenal treated Martinez because, on first showing, he could be as good.

Amadou Onana – why? Waste of a blue shirt.

Stephen (3), I never saw the game but nice to see you complementing Dominic on his very unselfish running for Everton with little back-up. Also Virginia, we could have a safe pair of hands there!

Onana was signed by Lille from Hamburg for €7M (£5.9M) last summer so they stand to make a significant profit,
(from some mugs) on the Belgium international who made 11 starts and 21 substitute appearances in France's Ligue 1 last season.

He had all but signed for West Ham but wanted more money; soft arses Everton, despite needing a striker, agreed to pay whatever he asked for, and paid £33M for an untried, unproven novice. Someone at the club was either conned, desperate, or received a massive backhander to pay that much for a player who seems to have no strong skill set.

And all this talk about "If he goes to a bigger club, you will see how good he is." … Not necessarily so: Kalvin Phillips, prime example.

Dave, I don't think my wife would agree. Six months in Afghanistan was accepted. One day watching Everton is a cardinal sin.

Paul, as the saying goes, we shall not be moved.

Stand up and fight Everton.

I wonder if queuing for the bar is a Wetherspoons thing. The only place I have seen it is in the Thomas Frost near the ground.

Virginia has certainly made a favourable impression in these two cup matches. He is out of contract in June 2025. It's possible he might be the keeper we sell given the lack of interest from any of the well-heeled clubs above us in the table.

I'm in the Park End so thought very highly of young Virginia. The cold really affected the atmosphere. My kids bought me a heated vested a couple of Xmases ago, it was great until the battery went flat.

That's never happened before but epitomised the whole night. Listening to Evertonians on the bus back to Lime Street was fascinating in regards to points deduction, but apparently more interesting than the game itself.

But whether or not he comes good elsewhere is irrelevant to me. We aren't in a position to gamble on nurturing players like that if huge bids come in.

He clearly has ability but he seems not to know how to use it (or his physique) properly or consistently.

With some players, it takes time. With some players, it takes a particular style of football to unlock their talent.

I think both probably apply to Onana.

I thought Dom's workrate was unreal, against two centre-backs. He had two good efforts which weren't easy.

Paul#5, The fee for Onana, whether it's too much or not, is staggered over 4 years.

Small details, but you could even see the lack of governance that is engulfing our club by just walking around the ground last night. For all the stick I gave Bill Kenwright whilst he was alive, I'm absolutely certain he would have made sure the streets around the ground would have been gritted before the game!

No TV for this one so I had radio commentary via YouTube. The announcers echoed what you said about Roy making 5 changes in 5 minutes, "That's half the team!" and mentioned the away support seeming unhappy about Eze going off.

They also mentioned the cold, hope you remembered your coat this time.

Come the summer, he'll have completed two seasons in the Premier League. He'll go for a significant profit, and will show the potential we've been unable to unlock, likely due to the limiting playing style our mediocre squad requires.

If all, or even a fraction of our buys had led to profits like Onana will yield, we wouldn't now be in the position we're in.

On a different note: Danny, great report as always.

He's nothing if not consistent, our Danny. A true blue even when it means his skin turning that colour! 💙

I always enjoy the whole day experience. Where is Paul Trail, by the way? Loved his stuff too, and the great Ken Buckley.

Tony Marsh, hope all ok with you. I reckon if you were still posting the web would explode with your indignation!!?

Two names there, Andy, that were a blast from the past for me. Ken Buckley (was it ‘From my Seat'?) – I always looked forward to reading Ken's match reports, feels like ages since he was posting and for me is very much missed. Hope he is keeping well as I've not read anything about him or his wellbeing for a long while.

And Tony Marsh, he certainly kept ToffeeWeb lively with his views and opinions. Eugene and his Moyes family holiday skit still ranks as the funniest thing I have read on ToffeeWeb and though others have tried on occasion, none have compared to Mr Ruane's Moyes skits.

My god, almost makes me wish Moyes was here again. But then again…

"The Moyes Family Holiday" by Eugene Ruane is a masterpiece of comic writing.

Made even better that it was fired on here as a tiny afterthought. For new contributors to the cause, please Michael or Lyndon, put a link up!

However, despite all this, for me, Eugene was definitely the GOAT and I too wish Michael or Lyndon could put a link to it. Pure comedy gold – fork handles meh.

But in fairness, most of the top 10 best posts over the god-knows-how-many years have come from that man. ToffeeWeb Hall of Famer.

Not finding the Moyes Family Holiday though… Pity as we could do with cheering up!

Open on a Presbyterian church graveyard in Peebles.

The Moyes family sit on a bench

DM: "Nae doot aboot it Morag, there's nuthin' like a mornin's brass-rubbin' tae gi' a man an appetite"

(missus opens greaseproof-paper package)

Mrs "Sardine and tomato paste or cheese?"

DM: "Cheese ahhhh this is the life, look at that view! Seriously, whit would ye want tae go abroad fae, when ye have all this beauty on yer ain doorstep? (looks up). looks like the rain is easin' a wee bit"

Wee Sandy: "Da, can a have a couple o' boab tae get masel a twix?"

DM: "TWIX!!? Get tae hell! Let me gi' ye some advice son 'never a borrower or a lender be' - Twix indeed!"

Mrs: "So whit's next on the itinerary fer the rest o' the day David?"

DM: (Jumping to his feet) "Brisk walk tae the top o' Ben Doon, back tae toon fer 5pm, early-bird discoont fish supper at McGrimms Caff, bed fer 7pm"

Wee Sandy: "Aww dad, we're on wah holidays!"

DM: "Well...ok, maybe we'll have a shandy in the Frown And Scowl..but don't be askin' fer crisps and the like coz I promise you now son, you'll be sorely disappointed"

Etc blah, continue for 2 weeks.

(And Steve, 584, he'll STILL take the factor 50, just to be. safe)

Totally off-topic, I did find this brilliant one on the remarkably joyous thread celebrating the record signing of one Romelu Lukaku back in 2015. [Moyes on holiday? Not exactly a family holiday though… not this one, was it?]

Mark (307) - "I wonder how Davey Moyes feels watching this unfold. Regret? Jealousy?"

DM sits in a darkened room, naked and covered in calamine lotion.

There's a knock on the door.

DM: "Whit is it the noo!!?"

Morag: "Av brought ye another bottle o' lotion."

DM: "Aye come in, this wan is awmost empty."

Morag enters.

Morag: "Ach Davey, that looks awfy sore, whit have a told ye aboot sittin' in the sun, yer've no got the complexion fer it."

DM: "Thought a'd be ok... had two cardies oan... an mah duffle coat."

Morag: "By the way, that boy's gone back tae Everton."

DM: "Which boy?"

Morag: "Och ye know... ahm nae guid wi names... the big powerful looking black boy, cannae remember hoo tae say his name."

Moyes smiles and thinks 'mugs'…

DM: "It's pronounced 'An-ee-chee-bee' and he'll no do them much good, the boy's gash."

Morag: "No it's no him... whit's his name? LUKAKEEE... or sumpthin like that, anywayz they paid £28 million fer him – ah'll gi' ye a knock when yer fish fingers are ready."

Morag leaves.

Davey takes the bottle of calamine lotion and begins to drink it.

I feared for Tony's health as he incandescently raged against Moyes's 'knife to a gunfight' type statements.

Ken's matchday reports – including the 'House of Nonsense' – made me feel like I was there.

But Eugene's contributions, whilst always entertaining, often elicited a side-splitting guffaw that would wake the missus up from the other end of the house.

There was another lad from Freshfields who (if I remember correctly) had a boundless tendency towards positivity, even in the darkest of times. Anyhow, love all contributions... from all the way down here in Australia!

I feel for all the youngsters (who aren't that young anymore) that missed out on the golden times in the eighties. Thanks to all contributors.

Looking back, how different it could have all been if instead of pissing all the money on players who were just chasing the £££, Moshiri should have concentrated on the stadium first, continuing the transfer strategy that hadn't been so bad for us.

Where would we be now?

Hindsight is beautiful thing!!!

Equally off topic, but I see that Toney is available to play for Brentford again after an 8 month suspension for breaking gambling rules.

Not only that, he'll captain Brentford at their next match.

Is that an unfair advantage? Different era, but Tony Kay was initially banned from football for life and imprisoned.

Anyways, slightly back on topic, but I'll wear a jacket to the next match. Maybe one of my old Army smocks!!

I remember reading it out to my wife who thought it was hilarious.

Tony Kay was done for betting against his own team in a game he was playing in, ie, match-fixing.

Still very harsh though.

He was MotM in that game so he wasn't working deliberately to lose the game.

With people reminiscing over some of Eugene's funny posts, my mind instantly went to that classic FA Cup Quarterfinal in Kes between Man Utd and Tottenham, in the game were the ref/schemer Brian Glover, was instrumental in everything!

As Dave said, in the game that they took the bribe for, Tony was made the MotM from the Sunday People – the paper that broke the story.

They thought it was easy money, and they had no intention of throwing the game.

Funny how times have changed over the years – remember Grobbelar given the brown envelope while playing for I think Southampton? I can't remember if there was any punishment or not.

For me, Tony Kay was the best midfield player to play for Everton – and we have had a few good ones.

Title would be an interesting topic, 'Everton – We shall not be moved, a history of injustice'. Doesn't seem to do them lot any harm being the victims all the time.

I'm sat here having caught bloody Covid and feeling as grim as a pair of tramps grundies but reading those Eugene classics again was the best medicine I've had all week.

Grobbelaar sued the Sun and won damages, but the Sun appealed and won and Grobbelaar was ordered to pay legal costs estimated at £500k but was declared bankrupt.

As most commentators say, Tony Kay was Man of the Match – the sort of thing you do when you are trying to lose.

Triumph and despair — The Observer, 4 July 2004

Former England footballer Tony Kay on his downward spiral after betting on his side to lose a crucial match

Brian was definitely clipped in that game and the keeper moved, so no complaints.😀