Fans Comment
Dan Hollingworth

The terrible realization
6 September 2004

I'm fucked off.  Still.  I'm starting to suspect that this rage isn't going to just dissipate.  I'm starting to think that it's become a semi-permanent companion — Rooney Rage.

We're a selling club.  I'd never ever realised that before a couple of days ago.  We don't keep talent for the future.  We sell it for the here and now.

We're on a par with Blackburn, Charlton, Leicester, Fulham. But even talking to these clubs fans is no help.  They felt disappointment when Duff left, or Parker, or Saha.  Sure they did.  But they didn't feel shock.  Or surprise.  Because, with all due respect, these clubs don't boast our proud history.  Their fans have endured relegation, having money, promotion, administration.  Their fans have been conditioned to enjoy the here and now — because yesterday was worse, and tomorrow might be worse again.  They're used to their top kids leaving — to the "big clubs"

I'm not.  Until a couple of days ago, I thought we were one of those "big clubs".

As an Evertonian, I'd never thought of our club as being anything but a "Big Club".  We're the club with the most top-flight seasons, the club with the second longest continued tenure in the top division.  We're the club with the long honours list, and a longer list of legends that once graced Goodison.  How can we be expected to "just enjoy the here and now"?  How are we supposed to accept — for the first time in living memory — an open culture of mediocrity at our club?

Why should we be grateful for Billy Liar and Everton today — when yesterdays Everton were so awe-inspiring?

This is what I'm angry about.  This is what I'm having trouble dealing with.  How am I supposed to be content with twelfth in the league?  I actually thought that our recent painful history was for something — that we'd have to endure short-term heartbreak for the privilege of seeing us one day at the top again.  That was until a few days ago.  Now, I'm supposed to be grateful for twelfth.  I'm supposed to enjoy every second of our triumphant campaign to finish outside the top ten.  I'm supposed to accept that twelfth is about all we can aim, hope or pray for.

Fuck that.

The sale of Wayne Rooney has just brought home the terrible truth.  The terrible realisation that not only have we not contended for years, we probably won't contend EVER AGAIN.  The terrible realisation that we will never win another championship.  We will never see a world-class player in a blue shirt again.  That anyone who does exhibit any ability will go the way of the Fran, and Bally and the Roon — just a cheque for the overdraft, and some other club gets our talented kids.  Can you support that?  Maybe you can.  I cannot.  Not don't want to.  I just cannot.

PS - Anyone who say "the money will help" I say... What about West Ham?

Dan Hollingworth