The Nick Armitage Column
Columnist: Nick Armitage

A Striker, Please
12 January 2006

David Moyes: indecisive

On Christmas Day the official site told us that there was little chance of Moyes adding to the squad during this transfer window but the funds that were made available were set to be used to their maximum effect.  Two things struck me when I read that announcement, the first was that I needed to get a life and stop reading about Everton on Christmas Day, and, secondly, why was Christmas Day chosen to break bullshit news that made no sense?  Call me a cynic, but I smelt a rat.

How can a club decide that it won’t be signing anyone five weeks before the transfer window closes if there is allegedly money available? Answers on a postcard please.

Since Christmas Moyes has said, "I don't think there'll be any movement at all. The people I would prefer to bring in are not available. I don't think there'll be anyone coming in."  Marvellous.

If he has one, I just cannot get to grips with the transfer policy of Dithering Dave.  Last season we finished fourth but with a negative goal difference.  Even my mum knew that Everton needed strikers.  So all last summer we waited for a striker to sign – nothing.  And look what has happened since.

Now our goal difference is far worse than at anytime last season, only Sunderland have a lower one and what does Dithering Dave do?  He brings someone in on trial, he’s young, he quick and he’s dead keen to play in the Premiership – this sounds too good to be true.  It is too good to be true, it’s another left back.

The best chance we had of signing a striker went up in smoke when Moyes spunked away five million quid on a centre half he hadn’t even spoken to and who only let play once because his favourite centre half was making more cock ups than David Blunkett.  People will say that five million hasn’t gone to Udinese in a lump sum, and I will agree, we aren’t in the business of paying five million pounds for a five million pound player.  But the funds that have been set aside to pay for Per Krøldrup’s expensive Danish rump to warm the bench could surely have been sent elsewhere to pay for a striker.

Every manager wants the best players for himself, but in the real world you get the players who are prepared to play for you.  Moyes wants Robbie Keane and he nearly got him last summer, but now Robbie Keane wouldn’t come to Everton in a month of Sundays so Moyes reminds us that the people he would prefer to bring in aren’t available.  Marvellous.

Now if you go to a front door and the doorbell doesn’t work do you stand there all day pressing it or do you try the knocker?  It appears David Moyes is the type of person who just keeps pressing that bell – why not implement Plan B?  The stance of our manager is utterly perplexing and it’s the main reason why this season has been downright appalling.  It’s like refusing to drive any car because you can’t afford a Ferrari – sheer bloody-minded madness.  And for those who say, “there aren’t any players available” just watch the other clubs sign players in front of our noses.

Moyes has good and bad points but the bad side to Moyes i.e. his absence of clout and decisiveness in the transfer market, is dragging us right down.  The only players Moyes signs are the players that nobody else wants.  Perhaps the most damning indictment of him is that in one whole year of searching he has not been able to bring in a quick centre forward who can net more often than once in a blue moon.  What can he be waiting for?

Nick Armitage

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