Lampard's challenge laid bare by blunt Blues

We need to press a reset button and get back to how we were a couple of weeks ago, optimistic and confident, faith in our progress.

These last three matches have been tough games but it has been the manner of defeat that is worrying. We have offered nothing offensively for hours on end. This is how crises start.

Zero threat gives the opposition confidence to attack with more numbers, you are always under pressure and chances are – no matter how good the defence is –you leak a goal.

We are missing Patterson's dynamism and energy, we look a better team with him in it. For now, we need to change things in how we play, we are getting snuffed out too easily before we can even start to think about creating anything.

Any attacks are shot at birth. That is a sure sign of dysfunction in the set up, Frank has to find solutions and fast.

Our wingers are playing like firefighting midfielders, so I'd seriously consider dropping both and going for a hybrid 4-4-2 system with Maupay playing off Calvert-Lewin, bringing Garner into midfield and using Iwobi as an attacking midfielder.

I think this set-up will have far more potential to get us some hard-fought wins. It also gives some options to change the game from the bench during the last 30 minutes, when there will be more space for our currently ineffective wingers to ply their trade. Until we have Patterson back and more attacking quality, something has to give.

Year-in & year-out, it feels like Everton trying to find an exciting attacking team is akin to finding the whereabouts of Lord Lucan.

Each year it's the same dysfunctional broken rubbish with more millions spent on players that either can't pass a football, can't attack, and can't shoot.

More millions spent on McNeil, Maupay and Onana, not one looks like offering the solution to what we really needed going forward.

Apart from the centre-backs, and Nathan Patterson when he's back fit, we could do with marked improvement – signings in all other areas.

The left-back, Mykolenko, is bang average, not a modern-day full-back; he's a semi-competent defender but crossing the halfway line, his limitations are grossly exposed.

Gordon in front of him is the most overrated player I think I've seen in 30 years.

Apart from running about a lot last season, pretending that he was making more things happen than he actually did, I just can't subscribe to the hype.
What does he do?

Does he put loads of great crosses in?
Has he got a particularly hard shot?

Then you have Gray on the opposite flank, another one that gets the ball and is fast becoming so predictable and a one-trick pony, it's easy to see why his career has been what is has been at the age of 25.

Middle of the park, you have no kind of cohesion. Gana is doing the work of two men because Onana is basically so undisciplined at what he's supposed to be doing, and at 33, Gana can't do that.

Another thing with Onana, why does he keep hitting the deck? You are a big man, lad… if you want to hurt the opposition, then get on the ball and start making your physical stature count!

People think it will improve when Calvert-Lewin is fit; it won't. All we'll do is hit high balls at him with nobody anywhere near in support.

I really think Frank has his work cut out here. Hopefully he can turn the tide of rank mediocrity; however, we've been driven down the same road too many times, haven't we?

It usually always ends the same way.

Everton are playing to draw nil-nil. If we are really lucky, we might sneak a breakaway or setpiece goal.

We often have possession, but rarely is it the kind of possession which threatens to break down the opposition's defence, it is simply possession for its own sake.

Our wingers constantly are attempting to move inside, so that rarely does anyone go down the outside and centre the ball. So Calvert-Lewin's strengths, when he plays, are totally negated – not by the opposition, but by our setup and style of play.

We need a player who can control the midfield rather than players who are there mainly to restrict the opposition's midfield. Who that player might be, I have no idea!

Watching Everton is depressing. On Saturday, I shall make one of my rare trips to Liverpool and watching Everton live is, of course, part of my agenda. I'd love to see them score, but am not totally convinced that that is possible unless something changes.

Incidentally, it will be my 350th game since my first one in 1953-54. COYB

We signed Maupay but he was used to a totally different brand of football, all intricate and on the ground at Brighton and based mostly on attacking.

At Everton, someone clearly didn't tell him that 'attack' is a forbidden word these days.

Not only didn't we replace Richarlison's goals and work ethic, we haven't even replaced the fella that was suspended for a year (he who cannot be named).

We didn't replace his goals or James Rodriguez's creativity.

So I shall repeat what I said: you win very few matches by sitting back. Unfortunately, it looks like Lampard. doesn't understand that.

Gray and Gordon just run blindly with the ball and 99% of the time they lose it or nothing comes from it.

The left-back needs resting as he has been poor.

Coleman also needs to be replaced and until Patterson is fit, maybe try Holgate there?

Surely Frank will not persevere with the same players and tactics?

One of the basics of any football team is the ability to pass the ball, and this Everton team are unable to do this. As a consequence, I find it difficult to recall when we last played three or four successful passes in sequence.

Our current game plan seems to be long passes out of defence, a scramble for the ball further upfield, followed by a misplaced pass or a booking for one of our players.

I am with those who argue for a change in formation, and for the moment at least, forget about using wingers.

Bolstering the midfield would perhaps offer some much-needed protection for Onana, who clearly has some talent but we are really asking too much of him in the present system; hence his mistakes.

Also, on last night's showing, young Gordon is a very lucky young man, whose record this season is I think 2 goals and 6 bookings. He needs to forget the hair dye and get back to basics – and quickly.

Last night, Trippier and Pope got me 15 points, which helped me deal with such an impotent performance.

Newcastle are strong to give them credit.

We've had utter chaos and incompetence over the past few years, culminating in Rafa as our Liz Truss.

Now we've got Keir Starmer in charge – steady, reliable, less toxic, but no big ideas to move us forward and no money available, leading to a slower, kinder, but no less inevitable decline.

Dazzling thoroughbreds in action. Fast intricate passing... and the goals? Amazing. It's like they never miss.

They're smashing them in from all angles leaving the ‘keeper with no chance.

Then Saturday comes… (or Wednesday, in this case).

Note to Frank: can we play in hi-viz bibs against Palace?

With modern techniques, you could easily put Maupay's head on Maradona's body, or map Calvert-Lewin's body onto Haaland's.

Unfortunately, we don't have a Tom Cruise who actually does his own stunts - or even real stunt men (in wigs) who can fall off high buildings onto large piles of cardboard boxes. We've just got a collection of Amazon Galadriels.

The saving grace is there appears enough improvement to stay out of the Bottom 3 but we shouldn't be surprised by defeats against Man Utd, Spurs and Newcastle Utd – all have better squads than ours.

Our defence has improved beyond compare

We are far more difficult to beat, or less likely to get battered

Out of our 5 defeats - 4 are somewhat expected.

The acid test is the next 4 games. If we get through these unbeaten and pick up 2 or 3 wins, we'll be okay.

We had last season's mostly farcical football, the highlight of which was avoiding relegation. Why can no-one pass a ball correctly?

Why does a certain winger dodge any tackle and always fail to intercept an opponent's obvious pass whilst waving his arms?

Why has the back-pass become Everton's first-choice move?

Dear, oh dear... will I ever see again “The School of Science” from latter years?

Woe is me.

COYB

That's about how fine the line is.

We just have to hope they stay injury free.

Gordon seems to have lost all his confidence. I lost count how many times in the first half he got the ball on the wing and then stopped and passed back.

Onana is far too casual at times and, for their goal, he got tackled having a lovely jog in the middle of the park when he should've been busting a gut carrying it forward.

The only positive was the defence. Using passing triangles to play out from the back really worked.

I think Frank needs to be smart regarding Onana and take him out for a few games and give Garner a go.

We need some controlled possession in that midfield area and right now it's just bouncing around with nobody showing the slightest bit of composure or responsibility.

I said a few weeks ago, I see similarities with Onana and when Fellaini first arrived here (although Fellaini looked a far greater technical footballer to be fair).

Moyes had the nous to move him out of the battlefield where he was getting destroyed for a while and pushed him up behind the striker, and it seemed to ease his transition stage.

It may or may not work with Onana but at least show you are trying.

I haven't really seen any savvy moves from Lampard yet and in some ways that concerns me because, in this league, when you have little to play with, you need to be clever.

Sam Allardyce did the exact same in 2017 when he first arrived, simplified the game and starting putting regular points on the board.

Frank needs to learn this fast because I really don't want to see him getting thrown under the bus, and that seems the way we are heading at present.

Please tell them to stay on their feet, it shows weakness and away crowds jump on that. Onana holding his head and Gray and Gordon going down is embarrassing.

Grow a pair, lads.

I would play Onana further forward. We are coughing up possession far too easily across the team, so if he's in the team – let him win it in the final third.

Everyone seems desperate to get Garner in the team. For me, it's Gordon or Gray that come out. Neither are scoring or assisting and that's their job. When they have an opportunity to shoot or put a cross in, they either chicken out or it's terrible fare.

I agree, mate, that's what I've said about Onana.

I don't think he's good enough at the minute for midfield, there are too many teams in this league that won't give you a second on the ball and he is getting caught like a rabbit in the headlights.

If he must remain on the pitch, then push him behind Calvert-Lewin or Maupay whoever, and tell him to simply make a nuisance of himself.

As we say, it worked with Fellaini, first season was too much in midfield but he walked away with 9 goals to his name and after that he adapted to his preferred role.

While proof-reading your report (sorry, lifetime obsession), I agreed that Newcastle weren't really that much better than Everton but I had to look twice at the claim made in reference to Guimares and Almiron, that "Lampard has pieces at his disposal who could provide the same." (I changed pieces to players!)

Does he, though?

Yes, each of Maupay, Gray and McNeil have put their laces through the ball to score, but each only once so far this season in 11 Premier League games, and we're approaching one-third of the season gone already.

I haven't checked to see how many goals Guimares and Almiron have scored but I just don't think we have that calibre of firepower.

The fact is, no manager in the world could have come in after Benitez and be expected to have sorted the club out by this stage given our financial state of affairs. One thing he could do is sort out the best way of scoring goals and that can't be by playing Gordon and Gray with Calvert-Lewin up the front.

That just doesn't work on any level, neither Gordon or Gray can cross the ball to provide quality service to Calvert-Lewin or score enough goals themselves, so playing this trio will inevitably leave us goalless in most games they play together.

Lampard needs to get someone down the flanks who can create chances, or buy someone in the next window who can. If that means selling a few players like Gordon and Gray, then so be it. It may be our only chance of climbing out of the Bottom 6 and avoiding the spectre of relegation.

Almiron 4 goals in 10 games

Guinnessmares 2 goals 1 assist in 7 games

I see even Lyndon can't escape the MK spooling and grammar police!!!!

Keep up the good work.

Previous games, there's been the odd backwards pass, resulting in Pickford receiving the ball, but the last few games, it's become almost a ritual. If you pass backwards, you're going the wrong way.

Also seen in the game against Newcastle was 4 passes back and forth between two defenders to end up playing the ball out. Why? Get rid of it!

The players are trying too hard and they were far more comfortable with the simple stuff. Why not keep it that way?

I always get nervous when defenders start scoring in games where forwards don't. I'm all for the rest of the team pitching in on the goals – it's a team game after all! In recent games, the strikers just haven't had the service so it takes a marauding defender to take up the baton.

In our case, the backwards passing results in nothing in the final third and stealing a goal where we can. When did that become our number one tactic?

At least Leeds play fast and energetic football. Fulham seem to attack with numbers. Leicester (who are also down there) had the temerity to win the bloody thing (and the FA Cup to boot).

West Ham have wild seasons but generally have flair players. Southampton are turd but never seen in real danger and they seem to regularly produce youth gems.

Now don't get me wrong: we've also produced Hibbert and Osman. We've thrown in a few semi-finals. We've even had superstars that loved the club and had to be prised away (Big Rom, Ross Barkley, Carlo Magnifico) but generally it's year-in & year-out of dross.

Not many clubs have a 㿞M player they a) couldn't use and b) couldn't sell. Not many clubs have a wonderful benefactor that happens to be an Oligarch of sanctioned state. Even fewer clubs manage to sail the tightrope of FFP – simultaneously being threatened with court action whilst procuring luminary greats for 㿊M (McNeil, Maupay) in areas of the field we needed less than a bona fide goalscorer.

Just as we never replaced Big Rom, we've not replaced Richarlison nor Sigurdsson.

Just as we have no ‘brain' in the team (a playmaker, a Mikel Arteta type player to direct the attacks and dictate the tempo), we seemingly have a lack of a brain upstairs. Sure, the recruitment was good but did we need each of Onana, Gana and Garner (to add to Davies, Doucoure, Iwobi) more than we needed a striker or midfielder? As we saw from Maupay's goal vs West Ham, a goal changes a game. (I like Maupay but play him in his best position in a style that suits him so he can get 10 goals a season.)

Yes, this is a rant because we change the managers, we change the players, but nothing actually changes: the football is (across the season) crap. The finish is crap, and the direction of travel is uninspiring.

Why is the football always so one-paced? Why do we never beat Liverpool? Why do we always lack energy? Why don't we flood the box with players? Why don't we play front-foot football knowing we'll lose some but win some too? Why don't we ever twat any teams? Not even lower-division teams? We're just as likely to lose to them than win 4-0.

Why don't our midfielders ever drive towards the goal or run ahead of the strikers?

Why are we so shit?

Leeds spent about 15 years outside the top flight and came closer to the drop last year than we did; last day survival.

Manchester City dropped to the 3rd tier and only a very late injury time winner recovered their longer term fortunes otherwise they could easily have stayed there.

Fulham and Leicester are traditionally yo-yo clubs. I believe Everton are only one of 3 current top flight clubs who haven't been relegated in my life time (born 1971), despite flying close to the wind on 3 occasions.

I get the sentiment, but to suddenly suspect they are better because of a couple of results and performances doesn't resonate with me. It's what you do over time that counts.

I get that but it's all rather drab, isn't it, mate? Dross… every damn season.