In an emotional and revealing interview with Gary Neville, Dele Alli has opened up about his past and recent struggles, admitting that he recently decided that it was time to take the bold step of seeking professional help to address his mental health.
Dele’s dip in his football career, first at Tottenham Hotspur after Mauricio Pochettino left the North London club and then the failure thus far of his subsequent move to Merseyside, left many people wondering what was happening behind the scenes and the 27-year-old sat down with Man Utd legend Neville for the latest episode of The Overlap where he laid bare his mental problems and battles with addiction.
Neville shared the interview on his social media channels, describing it as, "the most emotional, difficult yet inspirational conversation I’ve ever had in my life," where Dele describes how the news of the surgery he needed last season to correct a hip problem was the moment where he felt he needed to seek counseling, spending six weeks at a facility in an effort to get this life and career back on track.
I’m struggling to find the words to put with this post but please watch my most recent interview with Dele. It’s the most emotional, difficult yet inspirational conversation I’ve ever had in my life. Watch the interview on @wearetheoverlap here https://t.co/60d4IZwQmR pic.twitter.com/0cZowJGW77
— Gary Neville (@GNev2) July 13, 2023
In the interview, Dele confesses to his past dependence on drink and prescription sleeping pills and the fact that, in a moment he described as "heartbreaking", he contemplated retiring at the age of 24, well before the usual peak in a footballer's career.
“Now is probably the right time to tell people what’s been going on,” Dele began. “It’s tough to talk about because it’s quite recent and it’s something I’ve kind of hid (sic). I’m scared to talk about it but it’s the right thing to do.”
He explained that, when he came back from Turkey, he was “in a bad place mentally” contemplating the operation and on the back of what was largely a failed loan spell with Besiktas.
With pictures surfacing of him at a party surrounded by alcohol and laughing gas canisters splashed across the tabloids, the former Spurs and England star says that he decided to go to a rehab facility in the United States for “mental health, addiction and trauma”.
“I was in a bad cycle,” he confesses. “I was relying on things that were doing me harm and I was waking up every day, winning the fight, going into training showing that I was happy but inside I was definitely losing the battle and it was time for me to change it.
“Because when I got injured and they told me I needed surgery, I could feel the old feelings that I had when the cycle begins and I didn’t want it to happen anymore.
“Everton were amazing about it and supported me 100%. I’ll be grateful to them forever, whatever happens in the future… for them to be so open and understanding, I couldn’t have asked for anything more at that time.
“I was making the biggest decision of my life; something I was scared to do and I’m happy I’ve done it and, to be honest, I don’t think I could have expected it to go as well as it did.”
Dele revealed that the roots of his troubles lie in events when he was much younger that prompted him to do “stupid things that I blamed myself for” like drinking and becoming addicted to sleeping tablets which he was taking during the day on his days off to "numb" the feelings that were dogging him.
However, his time in rehab opened his eyes to what he was dealing with and how much of it was out of his control before he learned how to understand and process it all.
He spoke of how he had always wanted to cope alone with the trauma of the abuse and instability he suffered living with his biological family — including being molested by a family friend at the age of just 6, being sent to Africa "to learn some discipline" with his father by his alcoholic mother, using and selling drugs by age 8 — and found it impossible to let his "amazing" adopted family in even though they could see he was struggling.
Then, though he credits the game with saving his life, Dele admitted that the stresses of being in the glare of the spotlight of top-level football took a different toll: "Mentally, I don't think anyone will ever understand unless you're in it what it can do to you – you know, rejection, being told you're not good enough, fighting every day, even losing a game can affect you mentally."
Though he is still recovering from the surgery he underwent in the spring, Dele admitted that he is feeling as though he is in a very good place heading into the new season.
“I think this is the first time in a long time where I can say, yeah [I’m okay] and mean it," he said. "Mentally, I’m probably in the best place I’ve ever been and I feel good. I’ve got that passion back for football, so I’m doing really well.
"I know what I can do on the pitch; I think I've shown people what I can do on the pitch. Now I've got the feeling back like before I went to Tottenham when I had a lot to prove, I wanted to fight and I had a lot of passion and love for football — I have that back which, for me, is something I've missed for longer than I wanted to.
"I want to be a better player [than I was at my peak]. I want to be a better person. I'm looking forward and the journey from here is just exciting to me."
Reader Comments (232)
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2 Posted 13/07/2023 at 09:48:22
Fascinating, and certainly paints a different picture, and a potentially positive future for him, and us.
Here's hoping, because the prospect of a re-energised, motivated and sober Dele at Everton is tantalising. Exciting even. But then again, it is the hope that kills us!
3 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:00:38
It's a really fascinating interview and it's good that despite the things that've happened to him he took some accountability to help himself. Hopefully the lad is in a better place and is getting the support he needs.
I'd love him to become a success but with the money owed to Spurs if we play him it's a huge risk I don't see the club making sadly.
4 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:17:59
Nice to hear that Everton have acted appropriately towards him and Dyche comes out of it well too, a manager with a genuine interest in how his players are doing as people and not just footballers.
5 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:25:53
I wish Dele well, but because of the current financial state of the club, I can't see him having a major impact with Everton on the pitch. I can however, see him returning to Spurs or perhaps his former boss Pochettino will take him to Chelsea?
Good luck in life and on the pitch to Dele, it's a very brave person who can be so truthful about their lives, and even if we don't see him at Goodison in an Everton shirt, he deserves so much support from everybody connected to him.
6 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:28:18
Being sent to Africa (and his biological father), 'for discipline' at age 6.
Later, his mother and father going to the press criticising his adoptive parents.
He comes across very well... extremely courageous to talk about it. Neville does a brilliant job just talking to him as a concerned fellow professional. Very moving.
7 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:45:52
Come on, Mr Levy – give him a break,
Whatever happens, good luck to Dele Alli.
8 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:46:54
Jose apologizing... that's not in the documentary.
Eric Dier, one of his good friends at Spurs but still hiding from him what was really going on… very tough.
Gotta respect his 'scepticism' of the media, and recognition of his response. Something we really take for granted that top footballers have to deal with.
"Battle against himself"
Brilliant job by Gary Neville – not one of my favourite people.
9 Posted 13/07/2023 at 10:54:15
This lad's got more football ability than most in the Premier League. Rice and Grealish both went for £100 million. Dele is better than both.
10 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:09:43
Fly on the wall documentaries generate money but pose obvious risks for participants. Despite our need for new income streams I hope our club steers well clear of them.
11 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:21:19
It is a very moving interview and reveals so much about a life that has the highest ups and the lowest downs - and everything in between - and, quite frankly, it would be astonishing if that was not reflected in mood-swings, concentrated depression, and some eratic experiences and decisions.
I greatly admire Dele for having the strength to do this for himself and others. Make no mistake, this will give encouragement to thousands. Many on here would have been through or been on the borders of addiction of some sort and can empathise with what Dele has gone through and what he has become.
It's good to see the club supporting and working with him. This also makes me think of the mental n health impacts of footballers in the 16-21 year age-range who get rejected and lose their way and dream (and we at Everton know of more than a few who stumble and end up in terrible spirals with addiction etc.).
I have a real feeling that something good will come out of this and that, eventually, Dele's legacy might well be here as well as all the good he has done on the pitch. He will earn the respect and understanding of many - on here and everywhere else in the football world - who turned their backs on him and even lambasted and lampooned him.
It would be wonderful to see Dele regain control of himself and his career. That would be great for him and us and I wish him all the luck in the world.
12 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:33:23
The Club has been supporting Dele in both his return to fitness and overcoming the personal challenges highlighted in his interview with The Overlap. Everyone at Everton respects and applauds Dele's bravery to speak about the difficulties he has faced, as well as seek the help required. The physical and mental welfare of all our players is of paramount importance. The Club takes very seriously its responsibility in protecting the confidentiality of players and staff. Dele will not be conducting any further interviews in relation to his rehabilitation, and we ask that his privacy is respected while he continues his recuperation from injury and receives the full care and support needed for his physical and mental wellbeing.
That last part seems very strange... but typical Everton I suppose. Almost sounds like the club were blindsided and knew nothing of this interview, now determined to lock the stable door after the horse has done a runner?
Or am I getting paranoid?
13 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:37:45
The admission and recognising potential causes is the massive hurdle that needs to be addressed and he has finally done that which is the beginning for potential recovery, potential solutions and readdressing ways forward. Support and guidance has to be there but it has to have personal motivation to change and consider all options and advice and that is up to him to look to begin to take control of issues and not the issue control him.
He states the club has supported him, that is good to hear as employee support and recognition of the illness is – from my experience – something that is lacking to this day.
To those who don't understand this illness, the “get a grip and pull yourself together, lad†mentality doesn't work. It's a very lonely life and how much wealth you have doesn't come into it.
Jack (7) what a positive scenario that could / should be. If Kenwright was to do something like that if it's the last thing he does would be admirable. He is at the crossroads now. He's got this far and I wish him well.
Gary Neville shined too during this piece and he deserves credit for his handling of the item. If he remains with us, he could be a success, and the adulation he could receive from our supporters could be the greatest medicine he could ever wish for.
I wish you well, Dele Alli. Go for it, son!!
14 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:39:31
15 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:40:17
16 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:41:30
The club probably hadn't realised how much would be revealed in the interview, or hadn't even known that an interview was going to happen at all.
That last part of the statement protects the manager and the other members of staff from being asked to comment on Dele's health in the future.
17 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:47:44
Quote from near the end, 'the other side of fear and change, there's usually only positive things.'
Inspiring.
18 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:48:48
Tend to agree we should go back to Spurs and renegotiate, but it's Levy... he will probably ask for Pickford in exchange...
19 Posted 13/07/2023 at 11:51:31
Get yourself in a better place mentally, put it behind you, be happy playing football, scoring goals and celebrating them, and prove to yourself and everyone else, that you can be the player that you used to be.
Whatever happens. Good luck.
20 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:11:06
21 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:12:40
Poor bloke though. Hopefully he can get fit mentally as well as physically. I'd imagine we can't afford for him to play one more game as I think we were due to pay £10M so it will be interesting to see if he ends up in Saudi Arabia.
22 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:13:35
Let's be clear, there are people who were involved in his early life whose actions were utterly despicable and also immeasurably damaging to the development and well-being of a child. That Dele prefers instead to firmly focus on personal accountability for the difficult place he's found himself in augurs well for the prospect of future healing ahead.
As for the club statement appealing for his privacy to be respected at this time, that strikes me as a pre-emptive measure. With the usual press outlets being left out the loop up to this point they are belatedly going to be scrabbling to be all over the more shocking aspects of the story.
As Dele expressed himself, it wouldn't be surprising for people directly involved during his early days to start popping up to say “some shitâ€, or for them to be specifically sought out by the more scummy rags to give ‘their side' of the story.
23 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:16:53
One of many interesting points he made was when Neville asked him if he could get back to the player he was. He said, no, he wanted to be better than that. Worth the £10M?
24 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:17:05
He talks in the interview about being forced into it by tabloids contacting his 'team' saying they've found things out and will be reporting on it. It was clear he doesn't trust the media at all so if he was going to do an interview he would rather do it with someone he trusts won't have an agenda given it is his ex-England coach.
I think the last paragraph of our statement is us and Dele sticking two fingers up to the wankers who have been desperately dogging up dirt on him over the years and trying to blackmail him into telling his story before he was ready.
I read it with his words in mind that the club have been 100% supportive.
25 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:17:35
Can you explain what rehabilitation means, is it different to each person suffering from their mental state? Not sure if Dele has asked to go through the rehabilitation course or is it a continuous programme that can take quite a while?
Whatever it is, I wish him well and he can overcome these serious issues and enable him to enjoy the rest of his life. Certainly getting his career on track would help him enormously but that should be second to his mental well-being.
26 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:27:55
27 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:37:16
I know we can sometimes be horrible as a bunch of fans, but this lad needs us to show him some love.
28 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:44:58
Let's hope it marks a threshold for Dele Alli and for other people affected by similar issues – which is an awful lot of people. My hat is off and I am on my feet.
29 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:46:24
Funny really, £10M for Dele 5 years ago would be seen as robbery, and given fees now I really don't think we should worry about it.
If he can score 5 goals a season and assist the same that is good value.
30 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:47:47
He comes across very well; articulate, intelligent and humble. I think he's very sincere about wanting to get his career back on track and he clearly appreciates the support he's had from Everton so far.
Let's hope so, obviously that would suit us for all sorts of selfish reasons but really you just want the guy to continue his recovery as best he can.
31 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:49:51
Good luck to him, I hope he gets back to his old self both on and off the pitch, and I hope it's with us.
32 Posted 13/07/2023 at 12:54:21
I am proud that the club has stood by him, living up to their alter ego of EitC, but you have to question Spurs and Levy in particular for getting rid in the manner they did, probably knowing full well he was in a bad way.
I almost feel the club should buy him and help him to be that better footballer while exposing Spurs for their silence. Can we do it? Of course we could... no matter what happens, I want to see him succeed in a blue shirt.
33 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:02:32
100% agree mate.
If the fans are able to show him support and appreciation, then I don't doubt it will give him extra motivation and a lift to show it back. Once a Blue.
Even if he doesn't come good again from a footballing perspective, from a human one, it's still worth showing him that love.
34 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:05:44
All-in-all, an outstanding episode of overlap and respect to Gary Neville for the way he conducted it.
We may be pleasantly surprised this season and if so Everton should just bite the bullet and cough up any dues.
35 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:05:45
I now have massive respect for Dele for doing this and I'd be amazed if his football doesn't improve since the rehab. It would be all the sweeter if we could enjoy watching a revitalised Dele at Everton.
36 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:11:03
You could see his problems from a mile away, but when we we're on our knees we decided to put in a £40M bid for this chap. It's not a mystery how we got in this mess, we are a disgrace from top to bottom.
37 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:12:01
Tbh, whatever age he was when these things happened, it was a shitty and traumatic childhood by any standards.
38 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:17:51
I think my memory is as well - someone remind me what injury he has?
39 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:22:45
Moving on, I remember seeing him being shown around Finch Farm when he signed. I'd love to know what he was thinking at the time. I also remember Frank Lampard greeting him with a comment something like 'We did it'.
I wonder if, with this being revealed by Dele, there was a plan with Levy and BK to get him away from Spurs and the environment he was in, perhaps get some 'respite' with Everton, hence the almost Pay as you play deal. All sides potentially getting something out of it.
Anyway, whatever happens with Dele and wherever he is, let's just hope he gets the right support.
40 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:24:32
41 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:30:02
He's obviously got a compelling backstory, but now was not the time to tell it.
42 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:38:15
43 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:38:34
44 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:40:47
It takes guts to come out with things like this: alcoholism, drug addiction, gambling and this is one of the worst atrocities to happen to any child.
Not having a go, just pointing it out. ðŸ™
45 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:40:50
46 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:43:48
I don't mean to downplay these terrible things, it's just I don't think you'd choose to do this in this manner for a number of different reasons.
Why tell the world about this? and why now? I'm just not seeing the benefit.
47 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:47:16
I'm not enamoured with the open arena angle. It's become normalized to hear such as the public good and spreading awareness lines. I don't see how it helps anyone to have this out there.
Maybe he has no-one solid to turn to, no real support in the genuine sense, no one advising him impartially.
Hopefully he comes through and doesn't lose himself.
48 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:48:52
49 Posted 13/07/2023 at 13:51:03
I'm also unable to recall hearing about his injury (assume it was picked up during a game in Turkey?).
Can anyone else please enlighten us?
50 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:16:45
One question. From me of the club, shame they didn't support Gylfi, instead of hanging him out to dry!!!
51 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:17:09
I think he is very fortunate being at a club, regardless of all the negativity we all write about, that has a structure with knowledgeable people in it that can help his future.
There is no guarantee that he can recover his football ability, that would be a bonus, but finally he will be able to talk to people that will help him get over this period in his life and maybe he will even help other unfortunate people who have gone through the same experiences.
Good Luck in your future, young man.
52 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:17:43
Not an article to read. Suggest you get on You tube, make yourself a cup of tea and listen to the interview.
Then come back on here.
Catch ya later...
53 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:18:51
Other songs are available.
54 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:25:27
55 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:48:08
If you are too lazy to watch the video – it is extremely powerful and poignant – then why not give us all a pass on reading your posts on it?
56 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:55:20
Well done to Dele for addressing his problems, recognising them is his first major step towards recovery. I suspect he has chosen to speak out so that he is in charge of the narrative, rather than “sensational†revelations being made by our despicable press.
As for his footballing future, I would love to see him at his best in an Everton shirt, but that is complex. We have very little money, can we afford to gamble £10M in the hope we can get 24 decent games out of him before being faced with paying another £10M? £400k per game.
On the other hand, his value as a player must be very low at present. I think I'd be on the phone to Mr Levy saying “Listen, waive the £10M, we'll look after him, give him games if he shows he's ready, and hand him back to you at the end of the season worth far more than he is nowâ€.
However it pans out, very best wishes to him.
57 Posted 13/07/2023 at 14:56:46
And talk about opening yer gob and stating things which are basically incorrect.
I have no words.
58 Posted 13/07/2023 at 15:21:20
Now we are aware of the demons that have tormented Dele, and understand what he's been going through, maybe we can, as supporters, actually support him? Get behind the lad and appreciate what it's taken to come out and open up about his life.
Kudos to the club and to Dyche for the manner in which they have supported him.
Sorry, but expecting or hoping that Levy would show a shred of humanity and reduce the fee or rethink the contract to allow Dele to become the player and person he was before... dream on! That little creep worships money and nothing else.
59 Posted 13/07/2023 at 15:22:54
Whilst Dele says he feels sharing the details may help others and himself too, he did indeed, Peter, say the news of his rehab had got out. He wanted the truth to be heard, and that the media in general would not provide that.
I must say that's about the most relaxed and human I've ever seen him; no ghostly air and an ability to converse like never before. He seems ultra positive and relieved of his burdens. Getting himself right is above all else and it looks like he has a great chance.
As mentioned above, it's nice that part of what is the quality in Everton that matters to us, is still present amid the turmoil, and the shift in the modern game.
60 Posted 13/07/2023 at 15:49:41
61 Posted 13/07/2023 at 15:52:30
Get yourself better, young man.
Hopefully, all those clubs see and remember your talent, but won't touch you with a barge pole, have a change of heart.
So, you can move on and re-start your career.
And Neville broaches the subject of mental health with a number of players he interviews.
And I find him a fine interviewer in general.
62 Posted 13/07/2023 at 15:55:17
That said, I wish Dele Alli all the best and hope that he'll find some inner peace.
63 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:00:03
As a psychotherapist who specialises in this type of trauma, I can say with some degree of certainty that the past trauma would have likely caught up with him and he was trying to numb it with prescription medication. I hope now he is seeing a specialist who can help him process the past – coming out and telling the world might help but it won't heal the memories. That can be done though with the right support. I'd love to treat him myself, give me a buzz, Dele!
Let's get behind the lad, as others have said. I'd love for Levy to waver the condition in the sale (or even for us to give him say £3M to let it go) so that we can give Dele a full season with our backing.
64 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:08:01
Always had a real soft spot for him after that. I'd love to see some arrangement with Spurs over deferring payment for a season to give the lad a chance of getting back on track. It's brave what he's done and he has undoubted ability.
65 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:15:09
If, as everyone with a heart hopes, he is able to get his career back on track, can Everton actually afford to play him?
We've sold a number of players since January and are seemingly sniffing around for free transfers and loans. It would be unfortunate if he does have a turnaround but finds himself still out in the cold because of the club's finances rather than his own issues.
66 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:28:45
out there, it must have been very difficult to do. And well done to Everton for being supportive.
Tottenham now need to follow suit and also be supportive. The only meaningful way they can is by waiving the poorly thought out 20-game £10M transfer fee.
With our financial situation, Everton won't pay it. It's far too much of a financial gamble on a player who is firmly in recovery from a long-term trauma.
Tottenham need to set him free so he can have the motivation to win and keep a place in the Everton side. If there is no clear pathway to playing again, it's going to have a negative impact on him. He needs stability and clarity of his position.
Good luck, Dele.
67 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:36:53
And he has certainly had need of it in the very recent past. The relentless criticism he experienced this season at Besiktas must have been searing for Dele. His manager claimed he was "missing" and "didn't deserve to play", the fans reportedly booed him, and the DOF kissed him off by saying, "...the coach started using other players and then Alli stopped struggling. He can't handle adversity." I can't even imagine how those blows must have landed on a young man in this condition.
Chris #13, you were the first TW poster I thought of when I saw this, and I'm glad you jumped right in with your perspective. We have a few other mental health professionals here as well... smart people saying wise things, more than compensating for the few who aren't and don't.
68 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:39:23
Don't blame Dele for a second for his predicament, what he's been through would break anyone at some stage. We need to be supportive, even if it means he sits in rehab being paid for the last year, that's what we need to do. We've wasted bigger money on far less deserving.
As others have said, the right thing to do is for Levy to release the £10M handcuffs. Let the boy choose if he wants to play or not. Maybe Levy could do so with a view that any further contract signed between us and player would trigger it instead of number of games. If he uses playing to get life back in order, everyone wins.
Current situation = everyone loses.
Get well soon, kid.
70 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:44:07
Someone very close to me was in denial for years before she hit rock bottom last year and went into rehab. She was resident for 5 weeks and part-time for another 3. Eight months later she is a new person. It was the best $25k that I have ever spent.
I am optimistic that Dele will be a different footballer now.
71 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:45:38
If he won't, then I think we need to give him until the January transfer window, play up to 20 games and then make a decision.
Anyone know how to do this on Twitter?
72 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:46:22
The lad is still young enough and sounds determined to get his career back on track. He could be a valuable asset for us this season, providing he can get fully fit, and he sounds confident enough that will be in the next few weeks, but more importantly he, and us, don't have this £10M payment hanging over his / our heads.
73 Posted 13/07/2023 at 16:54:27
It's a great opportunity for Spurs and Everton to acknowledge the ravages that poor mental health can have on anybody in any walk of life – they could agree to donate the agreed fee to a mental health charity, even if it was in Everton's case donated in installments.
There's possibly some reason other than the goodwill of the clubs to prevent this from happening, but I'm sure that the authorities could arrange something that would be positive for all involved parties.
74 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:01:43
Levy has got more chance of seeing his money if Alli has longer now to prove himself.
75 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:04:21
We took a gamble. It might be about to pay off. We'll done to everyone at Everton who is helping him and well done to the lad himself. Top man.
76 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:04:29
A full season with us could springboard him back into a place where he can reach his old levels.
77 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:10:41
John Daley @ 22 says:
The most striking thing for me throughout that interview – over and beyond the big revelations that are obviously going to grab all the headlines – is his continual refusal to lay the blame at anyone other than himself.
Reading how tragic this revelation is, it seemingly through John's comment bears mentioning:
In a day and age when personal responsibility for one's actions isn't overly vogue, Dele should be lauded to the rooftops for his approach. It is so admirable to read about someone seemingly going through quite an ordeal (and again I'll watch the interview soon) still taking responsibility for their actions.
Normally I'm a "pull yourself up by the bootstraps" kinda guy. If what John says is true – and John is as straightforward a contributor as there is and I have no reason to doubt his statement – Everton have done incredibly well and Dele Alli is a hero for his approach to his demons and difficulties. If he is taking ownership of his actions, no matter what wickedness was laid before him, surely he deserves support and praise.
It's just heart-warming to me that a man stands up and owns everything.
Now I can't wait to watch this interview.
78 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:11:13
Well done to Dele for speaking up, and getting support and help he needs.
79 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:14:01
The only money guaranteed to Spurs was the £10M after playing 20 games. We do not, and probably will not, have to pay £40M. I'm pretty sure the rest is made up of add ons etc, such as winning the Premier League, a cup or a European trophy, or maybe a further set number of games.
It would be fantastic though, if we did end up paying Spurs a total of £40M, as it would mean success for us.
80 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:14:59
I don't feel there is any equivalence between the Icelandic player's situation and that of Dele Alli. Plus we don't know what Everton Football Club did or didn't do on behalf of Sigurdsson – the player may have asked to be taken out of the spotlight during that period, we'll never know.
81 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:15:12
I understand what you are saying – I don't think myself there's a right or wrong time.
It could be he's been asked to stop all the negativity at his failing ability – it's like when players, athletes etc come out with either being gay, transitioning, or coping with a mental or medical illness – they may get to a point were they need to “come out†as it were?
If it saves one person from suicide or a perpetrator being caught and dealt with, then it will have been the right time.ðŸ™
82 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:16:21
On the human side, while I think many were aware Dele had a difficult childhood that may have scarred him, I'm not sure it was apparent that stretched to being molested at the age of 6. Nor am I persuaded it was only once, given the environment he was living in and the low life around him.
I was like many, hugely impressed with how he seems to have handled it, above all, how articulate he was, given he has had a reputation for being a bit thick. Seemingly not so, he spoke very eloquently. Also, physically, he glowed with healthiness and I hope he truly is in a better place now.
On the football side, it seems we are doomed to be unlucky, paying tens of millions for someone, seemingly through no fault of his own, who was just not fit to play football. This is on top of the tens of millions wasted on Sigurdsson. Someone up there doesn't like us.
What next?
Being hard-headed, we can't afford to risk yet more money we don't have to play him. I agree with others: Levy should step in and agree a re-structure of the deal.
Without that Dele risks not having a chance for a new start and while I'm not entirely confident that will work out well in the end, I'm in no doubt after that interview, that he at least deserves a crack. So over to you Mr Levy. Are you human or not?
83 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:16:43
I truly believe that. And before someone claims I'm being overly sanctimonious, be assured I've fallen short on that count numerous times in my life. It's easy to make excuses, and as my Mum always used to say, "Life isn't fair." You do the best with the cards dealt to you.
If we have a player doing the best they can with the (seemingly horrific) cards dealt to them, get behind them 100%.
84 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:22:09
So play him, and make an informed decision if it's worth it or not before the cutoff.
This is his last chance despite how sad it all is.
85 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:22:47
I think I agree with the comments above though that we are in too much of a pickle to take risks right now.
The lad has relocated to the north (surely) and will have a fair amount of time on his hands plus a boatload of dosh.
He will have to be moved on.
86 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:24:58
I decided to look through the TW archives and found my post (June 2022) on Robert Tressell's excellent article "What does Dele Alli need?". Needless to say, there was a lot of bigoted negativity (On ToffeeWeb? Never!) to the article and especially to my initial post in response to the article. Below is what I wrote at the time:
I too have vented words of frustration towards Dele on a number of occasions following some of his less successful cameos last season, so I would be a hypocrite to say I hadn't. In fact, further up this thread, I have expressed some concerns about us getting caught up in the payment structure of this deal.
However, after seeing some ignorant comments above, I feel a need to post from a different angle. As a psychotherapist who specialises in treating psychological trauma, I hope we can start to see a shift in footballers talking about their mental health more. Calvert-Lewin spoke bravely recently; others have in the past – though usually once they've retired when it feels safer.
There is physical health and there is mental health, we all have both and they fluctuate. They are intrinsically linked. Both are as important as one another; however, despite positive changes in public perceptions around mental health in recent years, it still seems much easier for footballers to talk about one and not the other.
In my world, they are spoken of in the same breath and it is liberating. There are many reasons for this which I won't go into but the legacy of two world wars and subsequent narratives around emotions – eg. "Don't feel, don't complain, stiff upper lip, get on with it" – continue to silence and burden us as a nation.
It's easy for us to say Dele is finished; it's easy to call Dom a shit-house who doesn't care about us because he made about 8 appearances last season. We wouldn't say these things if they had a torn muscle or a leg break – something visible to soothe our judgments. If footballers felt empowered to speak about these problems openly, then it would create a better understanding amongst the club, the fans and players.
I'm not getting on my high horse – I am a flawed emotional fan like the rest of you. I am merely commenting on something (one of the only things actually!) I know something about. Now I am not Dele, nor am I his therapist but I want to put this to you all… imagine the following scenario, imagine you are Dele:
You are born into a chaotic home, your mother has her own trauma history and suffering which has not been healed, she jumps from relationship to relationship. She has 3 different fathers to her children. She falls into drugs and alcohol spirals. Dele witnesses a lot of domestic turmoil (much of this has been well documented), abuse and experiences neglect as a child.
You are wrenched between your mother and father, Nigeria, USA and back to the UK where your mum is abusing alcohol and drugs to an extent you are about to be removed by social services. You are falling into the local gang culture for a sense of cohesion and connectivity, there's a lot of concern about you and football is the only positive outlet in your life.
A local family (parents of your footballing chum) take you in aged 16 to stop you going into care and they oversee your rise to footballing stardom. You just concentrate on football without healing any of the above (this is pure speculation of course, I have no idea if he saw a therapist or indeed if that was effective) and you suddenly find yourself out of form for the first time and Mourinho as your manager.
You are scapegoated, embarrassed, humiliated and 50k adoring fans turn on you, saying that you don't care, you are finished. I would imagine this was extremely triggering to his past traumas around neglect and invalidation (pure speculation of course, all in the spirit of trying to change a few opinions) – all this time, you haven't healed from the past. Then you arrive at Everton in the midst of the most toxic fan revolt we've seen in years and guess what, they are saying the same things. All this time, you haven't healed.
They are human beings who are trying to do a job; yes, there are some who probably don't care about the club they are playing for, just like that guy coasting along in your office who the whole team carries. Let's not make assumptions about someone's attitude when their form drops off a cliff.
When past trauma catches up with people (it inevitably does) it's horrible, it can cause people to have flashbacks to the past, strong uncontrollable emotional outpourings, relived past terror, dissociated numbness… and the only way people often feel able to cope is through avoidance of the world around them and numbing strategies.
You are Dele and you've only mustered one good half for your new team, just one start, and before the new season has even begun, many of your fans think you are a waste of space.
87 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:25:05
Nonetheless, I'm still puzzled by the timeline – why did things from the past not affect him constantly? I mean why was he okay in his early Spurs years but not of late?
88 Posted 13/07/2023 at 17:40:13
I'm far from an expert on this subject, but I imagine that it's like having a time-bomb without a timer, you just never know when or what will trigger a particular response.
The lad has likely always been aware that something was bothering him, he's just never admitted to himself that it was / is a real issue, which was / is having a detrimental effect on him and his career.
89 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:08:19
The media scum and keyboard warriors will be out in force over this and I can see the "noise" affecting him.
90 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:08:59
1) Spurs get right to buy back for £35M
2) Everton get unilateral right to extend for our choice of 1 or 1 years on the current terms
3) If we stay up, Spurs get an extra £5M, pro-rated for number of minutes played across the league season, plus £50,000 per cup game
Meaning we will give Dele Alli the chance to play and, if he does well, everyone wins.
91 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:10:06
Pochatino left, and he was unstable again, drugs didn't work, made things worse... and yeah, to cap it off, he ends up in our world. We all know how we feel at the moment with bellend Bill running the place into the ground.
How amazing could it be if he wants to stay, galvanised the squad, helps resurrect and restore some respect to Everton?
Could be the proper use of Everton that...
92 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:23:47
Also, what was the increasing, and likely frightening, realisation that all the success and money in the world wasn't going to make this better.
I know a little bit about this stuff and know that it can and will get better for him. Write off no one.
93 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:28:28
How we treat Dele from now on will go a long way to influencing our reputation amongst his fellow professionals. And god knows we need it right now.
For me, his only memorable contribution of note was the Crystal Palace game. Who knows how he may train and play in the future without the weight on his back and the stone in his shoe?/p>
In the light of this interview, we must try and renegotiate terms because what we are desperately trying to sign now is an experienced, creative, attacking goal scorer.
We may have had one all along.
94 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:32:14
If we managed it with Reid and Gray, maybe we can resurrect another career!
95 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:33:16
It looks like he is taking his first real steps at healing himself. This absolutely does not look like a PR/image rehabilitation.
Let's show the human being some respect and support and he could turn it around just when we all need it most. Humans play football.
96 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:41:52
97 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:44:50
98 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:50:45
It may be the first time he's gone public (pushed by the tabloids) and seeking professional help to get off the sleeping pills, but hadn't he already found love, purpose and stability with his adoptive family and his early career?
Steve Shave will know better than me if there is still something in his past that's actively derailing his career but could it just be that he's simply an average Joe when he has to pull himself together when his form nose dives?
99 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:51:15
100 Posted 13/07/2023 at 18:54:52
You bring up an interesting point.
I recall about 2 years ago Jesse Lingard making a confession about personal issue. He didn't go into great detail and certainly didn't imply that he suffered to the level of Dele as a kid. But basically, explained that he had mental health issues affecting his game due to family or personal trauma etc going on.
For a bit, suddenly everyone was sympathetic to him again after calling him a "waster." Now he has had a disappointing spell at Forest, suddenly he is just a "waster" again.
101 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:03:10
And kudos to Gary Neville. I'm no expert, but I think I detected a light has returned to Dele's eyes. Keep going, young man...
103 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:06:01
Reading all the supportive comments and reading about how the club have supported Dele makes me a proud Blue and TWer.
Can you imagine the roar that would go up around Goodison Park when Dele comes on as a substitute in the 75th minute of our opening home game of the season? I bet it will be louder than the one that was heard when Doucouré scored against Bournemouth.
104 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:11:26
I rarely read long non-football related posts on ToffeeWeb but I have to say your contribution was brilliant.
I'd have to see the whites of Dele Alli's eyes to appreciate the sincerity of the guy but, giving him the benefit of the doubt in the face of what appears to be a horrific upbringing, I will give him an extra cheer if he ever pulls on the shirt again.
Some people sadly don't have the sort of happy upbringing that I and many others had.
105 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:13:05
Now, can he be what he was? If so, he would be the team's best player by a mile.
If he doesn't recover, money and addiction equals a short life. With a few exceptions.
I truly hope he gets up to speed. What a miracle that would be!
106 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:20:25
I'm loathe to add much commentary to anything regarding mental health issues, being a strong-willed type myself.
Had a lad working for me who always appeared to be crying wolf, threatening to jump off the multi-storey car park and the like. But he always sent a text and was "rescued".
He would pop into the local centre for counselling every 6 months and it would sort him out. Then one day he shoved a load of tablets down his gob in the toilets at the train station and his missus didn't read the text. He was dead a few hours later.
Ya just don't know with people.
107 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:32:57
That's a pretty good stab at answering Barry's question "Why did things from the past not affect him constantly? I mean why was he okay in his early Spurs years but not of late?" —which of course is a totally sensible question.
Essentially, humans are very adept at burying traumatic memories. We have a tendency to think that we can only call horrific abuse memories trauma, or war experiences etc. However, this is very far from the truth. To talk about what deserves to be labelled as trauma and what doesn't is a redundant argument, to do so means to engage in meaningless comparisons of horror.
What we know about psychological trauma is that it is not what happens but the meaning of what happens and whether or not one remains stuck in that appraisal made in that moment of horror or distress in the past.
Trauma becomes encoded in our nervous system and stored within our bodies, our bodies literally hold onto it and these feelings, memories, physiological responses can be re-triggered repeatedly until it's healed. Which is why I had previously hypothesised that Dele may have been triggered by fan negativity.
Psychological trauma doesn't always manifest in PTSD symptoms; however, it can (if not fully processed) cause all kinds of other mental health problems. PTSD (or Complex PTSD which I suspect Dele has) usually catches up with people as Barry alludes to in his post.
We might be able to keep it at bay but often this requires maladaptive coping mechanisms and we play the trauma out in other ways in our behaviour typically. Dele spoke insightfully about having a chaotic home as a footballing professional which mirrored his own chaotic family home. The sleeping pills he was addicted to undoubtedly played a big part in his increasing need to numb his emotional responses.
Typically, for trauma held at bay like this in CPTSD cases, there is usually what I call a "barn door" trauma, a more recent event that triggers or overlays on past traumas and "blows the bloody doors off" (said in a Michael Caine voice). It is entirely likely that this happened around the time his form fell off a cliff. He has likely struggled ever since with PTSD symptoms and addiction. As I tried to say in my post last summer which I have copied and pasted above, no wonder he has struggled.
The wider topic of interest for me here is when considering the poverty, neglect and social deprivation many of our footballers will have grown up in, how many other Deles are there out there in the spotlight? Bloomin' tons I'd like to wager. When they don't perform like dancing monkeys for us, we abuse them all over again.
My final comment in the last paragraph will no doubt "out" the usual bigots on here who feel that everyone should have perfect mental health, never make mistakes, and just "Get on with it", all because they are well paid and play for Everton FC.
To Dele Alli – respect, brother! If you don't know already, there is a wonderful and very powerful treatment called EMDR therapy and it works a treat for your condition and can help you process all these horrible memories. I for one truly hope you do.
108 Posted 13/07/2023 at 19:38:06
Obviously he enjoyed many years of success where he didn't seem to be affected by his childhood problems.
109 Posted 13/07/2023 at 20:06:26
If the one charge is in relation to the Dele transfer, then this is going to be very tricky and cause an elephant in the room for those bringing the charge against Everton.
Does anyone have any idea over the above possibility?
110 Posted 13/07/2023 at 20:49:54
I haven't yet watched what sounds like an incredibly moving interview, but I can say already how proud I am of Dele. The cinematic ending is of course what we as fans all want, where he leads us up the table, finds a place back on the national team, and has songs made up for him that last a lifetime. But even if he never gets anywhere back to his old footballing self, the steps he's taking to heal are far more heroic.
Let us also not forget as we cheer him on and off the pitch that when we needed him most, he came through and helped save the club against Palace. If he warrants a place in the squad going forward, why wouldn't we pay the money? I assume the billionaires who fund our team — whether Moshiri, MSP, or Usmanov — can find it in the couch. Levy owes us nothing, though, as much as we all wish he'd make it easier for us. We took a chance on Dele and it's on us to see it through.
111 Posted 13/07/2023 at 20:50:00
112 Posted 13/07/2023 at 20:54:56
113 Posted 13/07/2023 at 21:12:16
Hopefully you can get back to being the great player that you have been in the past, hopefully it's with Everton, but if not then wherever you go turn on the style and enjoy your football.
114 Posted 13/07/2023 at 21:32:56
In the macho world of football, physical injury is all that is considered. There is little empathy, understanding of, or sympathy for mental illness or addiction. Addiction in my opinion being a form of mental illness. No doubt the cynics will think otherwise, but this was a courageous step forward by Dele Alli to reveal his innermost demons and to share how he is attempting finally to deal with them. If he never kicks a football again, I truly hope he gets well. I believe his wish to help others in doing so, was genuine.
If he continues to be honest with himself and treat his condition one day at a time, then he has every chance of a return to normal living. A bonus of course, would be if in doing so he recaptured the form which made him one of the most exciting players in world football not that long ago.
This revelation today leads me to Andre Gomes. I've believed, that for a long time, his issues have been in his head. When he was at Barcelona he received a certain amount of unwarranted criticism from sections of their crowd which ultimately led to him being transferred. Since his horrific injury with us, he's never looked the same player and no doubt he's been aware of sections of the Goodison crowd giving him similar treatment to that he received at Barcelona.
He's had a magnificent season in France and is still only 29. What's to say that given the opportunity, regardless of the difference between French and English football, that he couldn't rediscover the form that made him the first name on the teamsheet at one time.
How wonderful for the team and both of these young men if they can prove their doubters wrong.
Form is temporary. Class is permanent.
115 Posted 13/07/2023 at 21:38:15
116 Posted 13/07/2023 at 21:47:32
117 Posted 13/07/2023 at 21:47:40
118 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:03:32
This interview has been so educational for someone like me. I just hope Deli continues to go forward from this time on. I don't really know if he can ever be the player he was, but somehow that seems unimportant today. I wish him all the best and I also thought Gary Neville was superb.
119 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:14:15
Dele deserves time, but it's a financial as well as a footballing risk. The club should sit down with Levy and explain that if Dele rekindled his form it's in the best interests of both clubs so more leeway should be given, extenuating circumstances as such. If he goes out on loan Levy can kiss recouping any money for him goodbye. It's a win win...
We have no money to buy players. We have two class midfield players out on loan, unused costing us money. Common sense requires a rethink...
120 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:20:00
121 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:21:27
That is one injury no one ever recovers from.
122 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:26:43
I agree entirely Christine.
123 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:33:30
I can't be arsed with my job when I've got other shit going on in my life, why should we think footballers are any different? Cos they are paid loads ?
From the minute he signed for us I've always said get even 50-60% of the old dele and he's our best player.
If he really can put his demons to bed we could have a quality player with a point to prove.
The old dele at spurs was good, a more mature dele with a point to prove could be exceptional.
It's a gamble, maybe a renegotiation of his contract if we pay the fee to spurs ?
When Holgate is attracting a 10m fee it puts into perspective that this could be a steal if he gets back to anywhere near his best.
How does the contract work if he and Everton come to an agreement that he sees out his contract at Everton without playing the games to hit the fee. Them sign him as a free agent?
124 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:33:33
125 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:39:03
These last few years have been a sad time for this young man and his upbringing has been a tough one, but he came out of that and has earned himself money most people can only dream about.
I want what is best for Everton, other than the other way about.
The club has a duty of care and has already demonstrated this.
But if he stays and earns himself a place in the team and can discover some form, am I right in saying he could leave on a free this time next year after costing us a fucking fortune - please correct me if I am wrong ?
If I am right. with the money on offer from the Saudis that's where his "team" will be looking - guaranteed ! - cynical of me I know, but that's what I think.
126 Posted 13/07/2023 at 22:56:52
Wouldn't you think he'd want to repay that back to us ?
Negotiate with him so we can sign him for free when his contracts up.
Let Dele get one one over on levy.
127 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:04:41
128 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:28:23
Why then, did DCL take such a hammering for speaking of his efforts to overcome several injuries ? His " issues" can not compare to those of Dele but both of them are battling to regain fitness and form.
Give them both the support they deserve.
129 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:28:40
With respect, did you watch the interview? I fail to see how anyone who did, could not be moved by the honesty of it.
I take your point, but what is at stake here is much more than football or money. It's a person's sanity. Dele Alli has a monumental task ahead of him. Mental health rehabilitation is a much longer process than recovery from physical injury. Twelve months from now should not be his priority, living each day as it comes is what counts for him right now. I'm sure he is under no illusions about that.
Whether Everton are prepared to take that risk is another matter. We all want a happy ending, but sometimes they only happen in Fairytales. For now, after him opening up, everyone should support him. The rest is very much up to him.
130 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:31:29
131 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:32:27
Kevin # 36 WTF give your head a wobble and think about it from a human perspective, he's a young fella who's been dealt a shit hand and has had a breakdown, he's been through the mill and sought help to get his life and career back on track and brave enough to open up about his struggles.
If Dele gets himself fit enough, finds form and rekindles the passion he has previously had for the game and with it match winning contributions and EFC have to pay Spurs the necessary installments agreed on his transfer then I like many would be happy to see that happen.
All the best whatever happens going forward Dele.
132 Posted 13/07/2023 at 23:58:44
He's been feeling bad for ages and he's spewed up the dodgy curry, yes, you still feel rough and wobbly, but you know you'll be all the better for it.
How better, how soon, who knows. But a decent pre-season work out will help.
One step and one game at a time is the way. We all know how good he was, he might not hit those heights again but if he gets to within a fair percentage of it he will be an asset, not a liability.
Levy needs to come to the party on this too, I get the feeling, unsurprisingly, he was less that forthright with us.
It'll be like signing a new player - for both of us.
133 Posted 13/07/2023 at 00:06:44
I expected such ignorance from certain quarters. But your comment that he was 'never any good' is as astounding as it is incorrect.
Or are we expected to take your view of the Dele Alli of say five seasons ago as Gospel, given that practically every commentator, pundit, manager and player alike on the planet, were heralding him as the greatest talent seen in many years.
Obviously you saw something they didn't Alan. Perhaps you should put in for the England job, the next time it becomes available.
134 Posted 14/07/2023 at 00:07:45
I'm sure about 5 or 6 years ago, Dele made it clear he wanted no reference to the name 'Alli' on his shirt as he had effectively disowned his biological parents. The current context puts more reason why he wants to distance himself. I'd prefer to see the 'Alli' surname dropped and I'd like to know Dele's views on that. Or if he'd like to be Dele Hickford, etc. If he becomes that superstar he was on the trajectory to be, ill call him whatever he wants.
Stay strong DELE and anyone else who has been affected by such fucking rotten deeds. Take care everyone.
135 Posted 14/07/2023 at 00:09:39
A year out to work on himself and then I'm sure he'll have some offers if he can get himself fit. Or maybe he'll decide the world of football is not for him. Best of luck to him and well done for being so brave and candid.
136 Posted 14/07/2023 at 00:19:15
Many clubs and other sports and billionaire companies have incorporated this.
Everton need to catch up, but football in general need to do more to help past and present players, coaches etc.
It's surely just a part of sports science?
In Dele's case, this is just the start. I'm not expecting him to ever be the top class player he once was.
To be brutal, in the interests of Everton, he's not worth £20M should he play another 6 games or so.
137 Posted 14/07/2023 at 01:21:55
138 Posted 14/07/2023 at 03:20:05
However, I can't help but wonder if Spurs knew of these problems at any time and, without having any knowledge of the procedures, why any addiction or substance abuse doesn't show up in a transfer medical.
139 Posted 14/07/2023 at 04:15:58
Dele stated that the stuff he was abusing was prescribed by the club doctor and Gary Neville agreed that it was common practice to take one the night before a game.
These drugs have a half-life and a day or two off them will reduce blood levels to a "normal" level. A medical when he was transferred would be unlikely to detect them.
140 Posted 14/07/2023 at 04:31:10
Thanks for that, but I always thought, without actually knowing, that players undergoing a transfer medical had a dossier of their past injuries and treatments and if so, why it isn't shown or queried at the time, which perhaps it was and as you say, regarded, unfortunately, as almost standard practice.
Unfortunately, I doubt past traumas are ever discussed and can be carried for a lifetime and may appear to others as either shocking or fairly minor as the effect is mostly unknown except to the sufferer.
141 Posted 14/07/2023 at 05:15:29
Having been paid handsomely by Everton, there are plenty of others that will be getting my sympathy before him.
142 Posted 14/07/2023 at 05:20:21
Levy, long-proven hard-nosed businessman, allowed a "only pay me if he plays" stipulation into the deal? If form holds, we'll pay Levy nothing.
I have no problem concluding that Levy agreed to that just to get Dele out of Spurs.
And Kenwright, for once, insisted on the stipulation on playing time because he already knew signing Alli came with risks.
143 Posted 14/07/2023 at 05:37:51
However, the fact of the matter is:
(a) Everton has a business to run of which most indicators are that it is in poor shape;
(b) Any competent business when recruiting significant employees does their due diligence, and if those responsible at Everton had done so, it beggars belief that they would have touched Dele;
(c) Everton is not a charity (despite a number of appearances to the contrary); and
(d) As Karl [141] points out, rather than do the honourable thing and take time out to address his personal 'issues', Dele was only too happy to sign on and take our money knowing full well himself that he wasn't worth it and couldn't deliver.
We have to friggin' harden up. There is no way the likes of Bill Shankly, Sir Alex Ferguson, Catterick, Clough et al would have picked up Dele, even if he had offered to pay to play.
144 Posted 14/07/2023 at 06:24:34
I draw a line between criticising the footballer and the individual. I try to judge a player on the pitch on performance as a footballer, not as an individual.
As the interview demonstrates, he is mixed up through his life experiences. We all have life experiences. Some are strong and cope, others eventually break down through trying to be strong on the outside when on the inside they are struggling but put on a brave face and a smile.
His personal life aside, it is often important to remember the goldfish bowl life the system puts these players into from a very young age and the pressure put on them in the public eye. It's easy to say "Well, they get paid well enough" and in some respects that could be considered a fair shout.
However, I don't buy that. Supply and demand. They grow up and live in a bubble with intense media focus. They have a normal life ripped away from them. Treated as commodities and assets. There is a human being behind that.
We never really know what's going on in the background in anyone's life, no matter what their profession is or how much they are paid.
I have experience of PTSD. I was trained in spotting the signs of trauma and having to deal with it first-hand. Young people who had witnessed things they thought they could deal with in foresight, but when they did experience traumatic experiences, reality hit. The important thing was to identify it early and get them to come out. Don't hide behind it trying or pretending to be strong.
If I'm honest, I think I had a mild form after my Afghanistan tours. I was angry and intolerant for a period. But I had my dogs, family and Everton.
People deal with it differently. Some cope, some hide it, some gradually get back to normal, some need help.
I hope Dele finds his peace and can focus on the game he loves. I hope that is with Everton, because, with his mind focussed, he is a very talented footballer. The important thing is that he takes care of himself.
I still love that clip on the Tunnel Access footage after the Palace match where he runs down to grab Tom Davies (being interviewed) and drags him back to the changing room. Smiling and happy. Enjoying what he does best.
I hope this helps him take a weight off his shoulders, find himself and find his love of football again.
Respect from me.
145 Posted 14/07/2023 at 07:29:56
146 Posted 14/07/2023 at 07:30:53
I think the only hope for Dele's career in the short term is for Spurs to set him free from this debilitating contract. Everton are never going to pay the £10 million fee on top of his £100k per week. If Levy cares one iota about Dele, he'd do something about it now.
147 Posted 14/07/2023 at 07:41:15
The former players foundation, Eitc, the people's hub are all things to be proud of as a blue at a time when the footballing side and management of the club are a shambles.
We took a gamble on a player out of form, that's the market we are in. We can't afford what Bournemouth, Brentford or even Forrest are paying for players.
148 Posted 14/07/2023 at 07:53:58
Everted have lost a great deal of professionalism since Moyes left, imo, and Deli Ali, wouldn't have been so lucky to have signed for Everton in another era, but I'm glad the club is giving him the support he needs.
Knowing Dyche, it would be obvious to me that he would help Ali, (because he's a decent human being) and when you hear his story, it's very sad that he's been kicked from pillar to post when it comes to the people who should have been there to help him.
I'm glad Ali, has got his adopted family, because they must have helped him get away from his dysfunctional blood relatives, but these people have made his life is very difficult because there is nothing worse than being surrounded by liars.
149 Posted 14/07/2023 at 08:01:18
Apply that logic to any other profession, models can be abused because all they do is earn loads of money for walking up and down a catwalk! Absurd when you think about it. Footballers are human beings, some have had it easy, some brought up the hard way.
I for one hope to see more players come out and speak about mental health, I think it will bridge a gap between them and fans. To the person above who may as well have said "well what's DCLs excuse then? He only had depression" how the hell do you know what is underneath his depression? It may well be trauma, often is. Thankfully there are some really insightful and measured folk on here as well.
Jonathan, nice to know there is another therapist on here, maybe we should start a support group for our long suffering fans? Maybe get a joint paper published on a new and debilitating mental health disorder called "Evertonitis", it's a debilitating condition after all.
Lastly, Dupont, well done mate for emailing Spurs about Dele's clause. I'm serious, how can we get "save Dele's career Daniel Levy" trending? Put some pressure on the oily bugger.
150 Posted 14/07/2023 at 08:05:08
I'd be interested to know what his living arrangements are and if he's on his own or even still in a hotel would it benefit him to move in with some of his team mates?
151 Posted 14/07/2023 at 08:23:26
The alcohol or drug is in the bottle. Provided it stays there he will be OK. His problems centre in his mind. That is what he needs to continually address. The substance is the detonator, he himself is the Dynamite. If he can keep the two apart, he has a fighting chance of recovery. His youth is a double edged sword. It assists his physical recovery. But mentally there are so many temptations out there, that the people around him will be crucial to his return to a normal healthy mind and body.
152 Posted 14/07/2023 at 08:34:06
On the wider question of sympathy. Well let's not put anymore pressure on the poor lad by paying 40m and raising expectations for him to perform. Far better to send him back to his home club, where they know and no doubt love him. Best solution all around. I dare say they would love to have a fully recovered world beater, in their squad.
153 Posted 14/07/2023 at 08:50:51
He seems to have come through a very dark period. Only time will tell if he can find his mojo on the pitch, but it is clear that he needs to be happy to perform.
Gary Neville really let him talk - a great piece of interviewing.
Te financial complexities of our deal with Spurs are the main sticking point but I suppose that he still has 9 or 10 games to show Dyche what he can do.
I hope he can get to where he wants to be.
154 Posted 14/07/2023 at 09:18:45
This is a notable exception.
I hope the Everton players are giving him what he needs too – inside and outside of Finch Farm.
155 Posted 14/07/2023 at 09:34:36
However, for Dele, for Everton, for every troubled soul who hears him, is it not better to try to understand and support him? There's no downside to that.
156 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:07:35
Having finally got around to watching the interview I see two sides. There's the young man who has experienced a lot, has struggled, and is trying to find himself. Unequivocally I wish him all the best and I wouldn't even want to speculate or debate anything about what he's gone through and is going through.
But then there's the Everton side of things and I can't help but talk about that. I see a guy who hasn't produced in a long time. A guy who was addicted to pills and drinking. I see a guy who has been out of rehab for 3 weeks and is still injured. Sounds harsh doesn't it, but which bit of that isn't 100% true?
I'm glad he feels great now but it's far too early to say he will be great when the slog starts again. He'll cost us a lot of money if we play him, and he hasn't performed for a long time at this level so there really isn't too much upside.
It would be great on lots of levels to see him back to his best and doing it in a blue shirt but the odds are overwhelming that it won't happen and we'd be throwing money away by trying to force it.
Actually there's a third side... do you think for one second this club won't use this for their own agenda? I don't see any level they won't stoop to anymore.
157 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:09:06
Why would Spurs renegotiate?
Did we renegotiate with the Italians over Moise Kean? I don't think we did, we stood firm – not sure we've ever had the money tho'!
158 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:39:29
The risk to Everton is high, cost once 20 games reached and one season left.. not going to work is it? If Deli does get his form back with Everton, Spurs are likely to benefit much more than if he is shipped out on loan.
159 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:44:31
No issue with people resenting the money. But the idea that money is a cure-all is a bit mad when the lad has all the money in the world and is clearly broken?!
However, there are some head-the-balls on here… like:
‘Time to put on your big boy pants…..' type stuff from the real tough guys.
Absolutely clueless and embarrassing.
When your point of view is at odds with just about everyone else it just might be time to have a close look at your point of view. I'm not saying people should instantly change or follow the crowd. But just take a look, reflect and think about it.
160 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:56:06
If, and it's a big if, Deli comes good, for once something will go right for Everton. And, if nothing else, Deli is at the right club to continue his recovery from drug abuse.
161 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:57:07
If he becomes a free agent then the suggestion made by David West @(126) becomes a good one, providing Dele gets himself back in shape mentally and physically- ie that we agree with Dele ( and his agents) now that he will sign for Everton under new terms and let Dele get one over on Daniel Levy.
Might seem pie in the sky at the moment but you never know.
162 Posted 14/07/2023 at 10:57:49
We may well have accepted Dele's situation as a risk worth taking.
From a football perspective, obviously. We need to keep reiterating that.
163 Posted 14/07/2023 at 11:03:14
It's a bunch of what it's.. but the deal was odd to begin with..
164 Posted 14/07/2023 at 12:40:45
Hopefully for his sake he can eventually get out of the woods mentally. His contract with us and however much we're paying him is irrelevant for now. If he makes it back onto the pitch half the player he was (for us or someone else) then great for him. However, I'd imagine that's a long way away and also secondary for now.
Football crowds can be cruel, dread to think the abuse he'd get from away fans if he's on the pitch. He'd be better off getting his head straight and if he wants to continue playing go abroad.
From an Everton perspective, I don't think we can realistically expect to see him in the squad anytime soon, if at all this season. Hopefully he can take part in training though, when fit. At least show the other player what real skill looks like up close.
165 Posted 14/07/2023 at 12:41:08
However, cant help thinking yet again that EFC management have to coin another old phrase had their kecks taken down.
166 Posted 14/07/2023 at 12:58:28
We have no idea what people are going through - and to be honest, nearly every single person has their cross to carry in some shape or form, at some time in their lives - and most don't show it or speak about it.
So, let's please stop attacking people in the stadiums, screaming at individuals, or sending them sick message or abuse online.
It's much easier to be kind - and if it's not then you need help.
For sure criticise a performance or something someone did - but never the person.
Very proud of Dele here and his bravery to address these issues.
I hope we 'supporters' can actually start to support and get behind anyone in an EFC shirt from now on - this will be even more vital when we move to BMD.
167 Posted 14/07/2023 at 13:22:22
Money is not the issue here - it's actually irrelevant in such cases. But yes, he made wrong decisions and could have made better ones for EFC too. But this is about something way deeper than football - it's a human story and he's trying to make it right. Great that he found the courage to do so in this social media circus of 'get angry at anyone for any reason'.
168 Posted 14/07/2023 at 13:55:17
The fact he has wasted his talent and brought about his own downfall has nothing to do with money. However if he gave back the millions he has banked whilst failing to entertain me in any way on a football pitch, which should be high up on any footballers objectives as well as winning I might have a little more sympathy.
Not everyone has the means to get there stories on TV or in the newspapers so forgive me for being more concerned for the poor fuckers sleeping in shop fronts in the City centre tonight than a footballer who finds it easy enough to get a model on his arm but cant get himself on the pitch for the game he loves so much.
169 Posted 14/07/2023 at 14:19:41
170 Posted 14/07/2023 at 14:30:20
therefore doesn't deserve sympathy.
Hi Danny [144] and Tony [148] I don't like to have to use this thread to let you know that Part 2 of, "The Ups And Downs Of The Original Twelve" is now featured on the 'General Forum/ Messages' link and I know that you have both said that you were looking forward to reading it.
I fully understand that because of the Dele issue, posts have been whizzing along at breakneck speed, and you may not have seen my post.
171 Posted 14/07/2023 at 14:31:58
If people have addictions or demons in their past it will impact on theiir daily activity and ability to function. Are you familiar with the term functioning alcholic, a person there but not quite there.
There are many people out there who are victims of abuse or addiction who are too scared to ask for help as they are told it is just there problem.
You have just restated that belief
meant to add a link to show how easy it is to fall
172 Posted 14/07/2023 at 14:38:13
The club did EVERYTHING right in this situation. Responded to Dele's request for help, arranged the sojourn in America, talked to him, supported him, and kept it all a complete secret until the journos picked up the trail. It would still be a secret if they hadn't.
I think the idea that the club would exploit the situation for publicity is so far out in left field that you couldn't see it with a telescope. No matter the odds of the eventual outcome, Everton has been nothing but class in this situation, and it's just one more reason I'm proud to be a Blue.
173 Posted 14/07/2023 at 14:52:48
And for some mad reason you say that he should give the millions back and entertain you? You specifically?
Took some doing but fair play, you managed to make all about you.
174 Posted 14/07/2023 at 16:45:41
Virginia
Godfrey
Tarkowski
Keane
Patterson
Iwobi
Gana
Warrington
McNeil
Maupay
Cannon
Subs Lonegran, Crellin, Astley, Hunt, Welch, Onyango, Doucoure, Okoronkwo.
Kick off 5pm uk time today.
175 Posted 14/07/2023 at 16:49:48
Interesting line up but I suppose it's probably our strongest 11 given the injuries, suspicious absentees, and players presumably given a break after the internationals.
176 Posted 14/07/2023 at 16:50:38
177 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:00:26
178 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:03:59
Others have noted this as well, but not only is there unimaginable pressure on players who enter academies as young as age 7 at massive clubs like ours, but that continues for decades, not accounting for the 99% who get tossed aside before they ever play a first-team match. And that's just for the everyday kid from a stable home, never mind those growing up in environments resembling anything like Dele's. Add to that the Premier League is the most popular league in the most popular sport in the world, and well, you all get the point. I work with teenagers and they spend their lives online, and if stories like these not only get more players talking about mental health, but get fans to refrain just a bit from being complete dickheads, Dele will have moved the needle just a bit in a positive direction.
There's so much to unpack in this story and this thread. One other thing that occurs to me reading those who say Levy and Spurs were hiding something or a medical should've uncovered just how much pain Dele has been in is that he's just coming out now and telling his story. He says in the interview how he hid everything, as so many people do who are suffering with mental health conditions, so it's foolish to think anyone could've, should've or had the right to know about Dele's demons. Fortunately for him, or unfortunately given he was pushed into sharing before he was ready, it's now all out there. As Mike Gaynes said, we should all be proud how Everton has handled this so far; let's hope they continue to show that kind of class moving forward, wherever Dele's path takes him.
In the meantime, yes, Steve, let's start a campaign to get “Evertonitis†into the DSM-6. Or better yet, let's all hope our own suffering comes to an end before that next edition comes out. If ever our club deserved a turning point in our fortunes, let's hope that our good karma from how we've supported Dele takes him, the fans, and the club to the promised land.
179 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:13:27
180 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:21:28
Good luck to him.
181 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:28:20
Sorry to hear somebody came over the ball on you on Twitter. What I remember about Minnesotans is that they were REALLY nice, almost nauseatingly so. Seems that is no longer the case. Condolences... that ain't fun.
182 Posted 14/07/2023 at 17:42:21
I wouldn't be surprised to read about counter arguments in the next few weeks, especially when you read about his early years.
183 Posted 14/07/2023 at 18:43:01
Really rooting for him now and would really like to see him prove everyone wrong. Watching that interview made me connect a little more with him.
184 Posted 14/07/2023 at 19:26:03
It wasn't his intention, I am sure, to give Everton a problem by telling his story when he did. I also think that he wasn't using his telling of the story to have a go at Levy or Spurs but I am equally sure that he felt more comfortable telling it at Everton because I think he felt more comfortable here to tell it.
As it is, this leaves us in an unenviable position. He saw us as a supportive lot and hope we can help him to ease his way through his problems. I'm sure we will as best we can and demonstrate our common decency but this has all left us with a problem that needs sorting asap.
For example, I don't know today if, even after listening to his very moving story, how long his rehabilitation could take or even if it will work (relapse into his dark days again) or if he will get back to being a quality footballer again. The fact that we are also skint doesn't help.
I feel that the starting point of a potential solution needs that someone (Sean Dyche?) from the Club has to sit down with him and explain all this to him and talk over the possible scenarios with him, explaining our problem and thanking him for trusting us enough to bring this to our attention and then take it from there. All this before sounding out Levy.
Personally, I think we should be clear that, although he had a bad write-up from Turkey, we will not hold it against him because we want to help and Turkey was before he publicly spoke out about it himself, but we won't be prepared to play him in the number games which would trigger another payment to Spurs explaining why and asking him what he thinks would be the best way forward at some stage. It may be a surprising answer.
185 Posted 14/07/2023 at 19:41:38
186 Posted 14/07/2023 at 19:45:55
There's a video link at the end of the story, at the top of the page. It's a picture of Dele with a play button icon within the words "Dele Exclusive"
187 Posted 14/07/2023 at 19:55:20
188 Posted 14/07/2023 at 21:17:27
How on earth have I endorsed derisive comments against Alli? That's a pretty damaging statement against my character that you might need to expand on.
The club appears to have done well by Alli, though it's exactly what I would expect of any employer. Doesn't mean they don't deserve praise.
But, as I said, I no longer see any level they wouldn't stoop to. I'm cynical? Absolutely I am.
189 Posted 14/07/2023 at 22:03:35
Not sure why you would consider my observation to be a statement against your character -- I said, implied nor intended no such thing -- but if my comment came over that way to you, my apologies.
190 Posted 14/07/2023 at 22:25:05
No negative press so far. Hope this is the start for him and he focuses on himself.
191 Posted 15/07/2023 at 10:20:38
Do you or James Hughes @171 know Dele Alli? Have either of you have suffered these so called abuses?
Reading something in a book or hearing it on facebook don't make you an expert just like it don't make it fact.
192 Posted 15/07/2023 at 10:36:40
193 Posted 15/07/2023 at 10:56:09
194 Posted 15/07/2023 at 11:31:39
I queried why his addiction or usage, not his mental state, wasn't noted or picked up anywhere in his medical or notes and while I haven't heard the interview, something you'll probably jump on, it has been stated that he got the sleeping pills from the club Doctor which Neville said was common and that he was taking them throughout the day to suppress his feelings.
Ed Prytherch explained that any testing would not indicate sleeping pill presence after 48 hours of abstinence but why then did the Spurs Doctor not query such a high demand or are we to believe that we didn't get the whole truth? There then is the question if professional footballers face the same drug testing regimes that other sports go through and if not, why not?
Having said that, I don't believe that this is anything but a start to his recovery, albeit a very necessary and difficult first step.
195 Posted 15/07/2023 at 11:48:33
196 Posted 15/07/2023 at 12:17:09
If you are inferring why the Doctors are doling out these sleeping pills as and when asked for and seemingly without question, in the interview, Dele indicated that he was able to get the extra pills required elsewhere, if my memory is correct.
Apologies if my interpretation of your comments is incorrect.
You suggest you haven't seen the interview yet.
If you have about 45 mins free, it's really worth watching. Fascinating interview.
197 Posted 15/07/2023 at 12:22:01
If you can't unquestioningly empathise with some who was sexually abused as a 6-year-old, you're emotionally stunted. You probably won't know it (because you're stunted), but the people you claim to love are likely suffering because of it. Even the scummiest Liverpool fan in Walton would have more genuine empathy than a few on here.
If you've got past 30 and haven't learnt enough about life to understand the various, subtle, non-linear and not-always-logical ways in which trauma can take you off the rails, then you've been sheltered from reality, not spent enough time around different people, and are probably stuck in a bubble of your workmates and the locals down the pub.
The ways in which people in their teens and twenties avoid dealing with their childhood trauma (substance abuse, promiscuity, partying) is usually what most other people would call "fun". Indeed, having done all those things, I can confirm they are. Just because you're damaged doesn't mean you won't try to have fun; if anything, it leaves you in everlasting pursuit of "fun" and the distraction it brings.
For me, it beggars belief that people haven't seen, or at least heard about it, enough in their own lives to know that deeply damaged people occasionally reach amazing heights before going down in a blaze of drugs and sex. (The 27 Club? No?)
The sad thing about the naive, sheltered views of this minority is they're the exact same views that have led to our country being the cesspit it is today. Usually, they're the same people who think society is softer than ever; people who don't realise their recommended approach of "just suck it up" for anybody who is suffering is exactly what every prime minister since Thatcher has been actioning with increasing aggression over the past 40 years.
We're already living in the world of "just suck it up", not some sort of soft liberal fantasy, a fantasy that exists only amongst an even more naive and sheltered minority on Twitter, The Guardian and the BBC.
If our grandparents said "just suck it up" to such things, and they undoubtedly did, then it also wouldn't be the only thing they said or did about the situation. Most would look after family, neighbours and strangers without question. They earned the right to say it through their actions.
Despite all I've said, I still believe the people I've criticised on here are infinitely more in touch with the world than anyone who thinks for a second that Daniel Levy might show some humanity re: this. Such hope is, genuinely, the opinion of someone paying no attention to footballing life outside Everton. The guy is making Kane, a Tottenham legend, choose between winning a single trophy and breaking Shearer's record. He's a button-down psychopath.
The romantic in me would like to see Dele play for us like 2018 Dele. The realist says there's no chance. We either won't take the risk, or the old player is gone.
198 Posted 15/07/2023 at 12:35:24
I don't think any Everton fans were talking about Dele's troubles and trials in his very hard life – rather that his football form had deteriorated really badly in the couple of years or more before Everton signed him. This was common knowledge throughout the game and that knowledge should have been well known to the people who brought and negotiated his extraordinary contract.
Some have said he was worth the risk… but a possible £40M risk? A bit much, I think.
199 Posted 15/07/2023 at 12:59:08
200 Posted 15/07/2023 at 13:49:40
201 Posted 15/07/2023 at 14:06:27
202 Posted 15/07/2023 at 14:16:47
Dele said he received sleeping tablets from the club doctor at first…in a safe and prescribed number….before then seeking them, in greater quantity, from sources ‘outside the game'. As we all know and as he himself put it, ‘if you want something enough, then there is always a way of getting hold of it'.
It was also stated that he didn't take them during days when he was playing, but would devour them like sweets on his days off to dampen the thoughts/memories swirling around his mind.
As for drug testing, sleeping pills aren't a banned substance for a start and clubs are fully aware players are taking them, so there would be no cause for alarm. Many such tests simply show whether the medicine is present but are incapable of indicating in what amount (at least, that's what I've been told in the past. Then again, I was also told as a kid that a dirty two pence coin judiciously popped under the tongue was basically an all purpose cloaking device on par with the bulkier one the Predator wore on it's wrist to blend into the jungle).
203 Posted 15/07/2023 at 14:24:53
204 Posted 15/07/2023 at 14:41:53
Roger, if we ship him out on loan for the season we will likely be paying a bulk of his wages yes. The business head on me wonders if the interview will have got a few sitting up and wondering if Dele could make it back to his old self. It might get us a better chunk of his wages picked up. I feel a bit cynical saying that.
We and Dele are unfortunately stuck between a rock and a hard place. The best we could do is play him till Christmas and even then only for 6 games. It is just not feasible for a skint club like ours to pay £10M for one season only to lose him for free at the end of the season.
So we are both buggered really and I feel for all parties here. He can't win, he wants to show us (maybe) that he has something to offer in the PL. We want him to too. But we can't really play him.
As much as the romantic in me wants him to play teams off the park and be a hit this season, my business head knows if we get any kind of permanent offer (MLS or Saudi money) then we can't really turn it down. Incidentally I feel the same about Gomes, otherwise just play him.
Wherever he plays this season, I wish him all the very best. To come out and talk about trauma and sexual abuse whilst still relatively young, playing and in the spotlight is virtually unprecedented and I respect him so much for that.
205 Posted 15/07/2023 at 16:10:33
''Eventually, when I had to pay Everton £4000 with every game I played I thought there might be problems ahead for Rangers financially.
“There was an agreement that when I played 60 games Everton were due more money. It was only four or five games before I hit the number I found out. I didn't know about it – it was between Murray and Bill Kenwright.
“It took a few weeks of talks before we came to an agreement and it was Murray's idea. He said, ‘I want you to play but can't afford to pay the money'. For him to pull me in and say that it was clear the finances weren't there.
“I suppose alarm bells should have started ringing but back then no one could have imagined it coming to this.
“Murray actually called Kenwright but he wouldn't waive it. So we agreed it would be paid in instalments. I paid £4,000 every time I played and Rangers weighed in with the same.''
206 Posted 15/07/2023 at 19:20:30
I believe that a couple of thousand things may be detected in a blood test but never is anything like that number tested for at one go (I'm told that about 200 in one blood test is the maximum but a rarity) but in a medical for assessing any problems that may stall a player transfer that a lot of precautions may be feasible.
I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's Disease (my immune system attacking my thyroid due to radiotherapy, definitely not just turning Japanese well I think so) while testing for something else. I know, can a price be put on a life but for 40M transfer fee I might like something as thorough as reasonably possible in a players medical.
When all is said and done, it is Dele's recovery and how he comes to terms with his problems that is most important.
207 Posted 15/07/2023 at 19:54:09
You, like me, have a condition we need to deal with but I bless the fact that I've always had support. That said, Dele's afflictions are way more complicated to address, never mind manage. I wish him well.
That said, our club is in a total mess with no wriggle room at all when it comes to expenditure of any kind courtesy of Dumb and Dumber these past years. How this affects their judgement on Dele (and it is "their" judgement we, as ever, have to rely upon unfortunately) will tell us much about the pair of them, and us as a club.
208 Posted 16/07/2023 at 05:05:31
However, the bad leprechaun on my left shoulder says, "Do it this time, Steve", and the good one on the right one has been unable to persuade me otherwise.
I take issue (mild as I may take such about just about anything these days) that I "directed" "acidity" towards Dele or my comments were "derisive" of him.
Read my post at [143].
First, the first paragraph expressed sympathy and expressed a degree of identification with his personal situation. I am not going to 'overshare' on this site what that amounts to, but the point is: What's 'acidic' or "derisive" in that?
Second, my second paragraph stated four facts:
(1) That Everton has a business to run. It does.
(2) That any competent business when recruiting significant and expensive employees does proper due diligence. They do. (And surely we expect the one that we devote so much of our time and energy on to do so.)
(3) Everton is not a charity. It isn't.
(4) Dele entered into a contract of employment knowing that he wasn't worth what Everton had agreed to pay him and could not deliver to the standard required. That is an indisputable fact, given his disclosure on Mr Neville's podcast.
Third, yes, those facts were coupled with some opinions of mine. However, I submit that those opinions were reasonably founded and not 'acidic' or "derisive" of Dele:
(1) That most indicators suggest that Everton's business is in poor shape. Of course, I have no first-hand knowledge in that regard. However, that opinion is based upon things like the apparently careful analysis of our fellow correspondent, Paul the Esk.
(2) That if those responsible at Everton had done their due diligence, they would not have employed Dele. With respect, I find it difficult to see how that proposition can be challenged.
(3) That contrary to fact (3) above, appearances might suggest that Everton was a charity. Sarcastic I know, but who can't reel off a good number of (costly and underperforming) charity cases that we have acquired in recent years (particularly from Man U - we could all reel off a number) or 'had back' (Jose Baxter, Wayne Rooney, etc.)?
(4) That, given fact (4) above, the honourable thing for Dele to have done was to take time out to address his personal 'issues'. Yes, that is to express a moral opinion, but to suggest what Dele should or should not have done so in and of itself is not to express contempt for him or to ridicule him (which is what "deride" is). Rather, merely to express a view as to what was the morally proper thing to do. The counterfactual is to say it is morally ok to do what he did. Now, some might say that that is to take a 'holier than thou' view, that this displays a lack of understanding of the complexities of Dele's conditions at the time, etc.
However, in response to that, consider:
(a) Nowhere in his interview with Mr Neville did he assert that his signing on with Everton at the time was not an act of freewill on his part done in the full knowledge that he was not going to be able to perform as a Premier League player.
(b) A good number of people in the state that he was in at the time would, I suggest, have taken time out to address their personal issues rather than accept employment to do something that they knew they were not going to be able to do.
(c) This hypothesis: You own a business. You engage an employee for a large amount of money to do an important job, you pay them their significant weekly wage, but it increasingly becomes apparent that they can't do the job that you employed them to do and which they assured you that they could do during pre-employment discussions. You're losing money hand over fist, and the job isn't getting done. Then it comes out that the person does not have the mental capacity to do the job, and knew that they didn't before they accepted the employment. Your reaction?
(5) I cited a number of successful managers who would never have done what Frank Lampard did, even if Dele had offered to "pay to play". Yes, the "pay to play" bit was colloquial, but that didn't personally "deride" Dele; rather simply emphasised that none of the cited managers would have acquired him under any circumstances. Do you disagree?
209 Posted 16/07/2023 at 07:36:00
I'm sorry, but are you saying that overall you find my posting (#206) amusing or just to the part about the Japanese discoverer of the condition named after him? The least of my problems, medical or otherwise, is taking a couple of tablets an hour or two before anything else.
I can't speak for your support but, where I live, mine has been the medical profession which is available to all who seek it.
My apologies if I've misunderstood but I was trying to make the point that perhaps player transfer medicals are not as thorough as they might be and could possibly have gone part of the way to uncovering such problems. At least we agree that we wish Dele all the best for the future.
210 Posted 16/07/2023 at 08:11:31
I have over time known a few addicts of various things and I don't doubt their ability to hide these matters, and in some cases not just from others.
211 Posted 16/07/2023 at 08:57:28
Something that concerned me about your analysis is the timing implicit in the factual conclusions you ascribe to Dele Alli. It all really hinges on this one, I think:
"Then it comes out that the person does not have the mental capacity to do the job, and knew that they didn't before they accepted the employment."
This echoed the underlying tenet of your analysis from an earlier post @143:
"Dele was only too happy to sign on and take our money knowing full well himself that he wasn't worth it and couldn't deliver."
Taking account of the more insightful posts above from those who have expertise in this difficult area, the impression I got was that sufferers co-exist by employing various behaviours to suppress the memory of traumas and hide their ongoing effects.
Going back to the interview, I may have missed this part but I don't think I heard Dele Alli say that he didn't have the mental capacity to do the Everton job when he signed. Nor that he knew this was his condition when he accepted employment at Everton. I may be wrong on this, so please correct me if so.
Indeed, it seems from what people have said that denial and a resolute refusal to accept the fundamental underlying issues, or their inhibiting effect on mental capacity to do the job, are highly symptomatic of the condition itself. Only when Dele Alli could get past this tremendous hurdle could he make progress in beating the condition.
Going back to the interview itself, perhaps the key thing Dele Alli did say in this regard is: "It's tough to talk about because it's quite recent and it's something I've kind of hid."
It would appear that he needed to go through the course of rehab in order to do this; in which case, he likely would not have recognized nor accepted that he did not have the mental capacity to do the Everton job, and that he did not know this before he accepted employment at Everton.
For me, if true, this would cast some significant doubt on your analysis.
212 Posted 16/07/2023 at 09:25:34
I've had my own experiences. Broken home. Mopping up the blood on a helicopter over South Armagh as the medics desperately tried to save the life of a 19-year-old soldier as we tried to get him to hospital. He died before we got there. Seeing the destruction in Bosnia and what people had done to each other. Heart-breaking. And then losing people or having them receive life-changing, loss of limb, injuries in Afghanistan. Things that live with you for life and never go away.
I was unsure about posting this as I didn't want to sound dramatic, but it seems topical.
People deal with their demons in different ways. In my experience, personal and helping others, get it out there, don't hide from it. It makes you accept and move on. Hopefully Dele can do so and get back to his football and the game he loves. His escape.
Alan @206, a very personal story and your last paragraph resonates through similar family experience. Life is too short. I hope you are well.
Where you named after Alan Ball? My middle brother was and my youngest brother's middle name is Howard. Me? Named after my Grandmother's favourite Irish song. I guess I drew the short straw.
213 Posted 16/07/2023 at 10:04:32
In my opinion it is likely that Dele entered into a contract with Everton believing that this just might give him back some control; new beginning, this time, new surroundings, etc, etc.
No one there knows, I'm invisible, all will be good.
The ongoing delusion that is part of what was tormenting him.
The huge change is his courage to stop hiding and his acceptance that they were often his choices.
I said in an earlier post that criticism and suspicion of him is understandable and not totally unreasonable. It seems to me that he absolutely knows that.
214 Posted 16/07/2023 at 11:00:14
I disagree that your army experiences have anything in common with this Dele debate – two sides.
I wish you well.
215 Posted 16/07/2023 at 11:27:24
I am drawing parallels with regards to mental health.
Early life experience. Professional pressure. Life challenges and experiences. The individual character. They all play a part.
Some cope at source. Some try to hide it. Some finally face up to it.
Yes, very different environments, but I understand the sentiment.
Forget me, I've learned to cope. I just hope Dele has found his peace and can get back to what he's very good at.
216 Posted 16/07/2023 at 11:37:03
Contrary to that, grey areas exist, best intentions are always stuffed up by an inability to handle stuff… you get the drift.
I don't think Dele is playing us, I honestly thought he came to the club in the hope he could turn his life around; instead, the spiral continued. That's not the club's fault, not even the player's fault. Without help, many of us spiral into bad places. Trauma, depression, paranoia, PTSD – take your pick: human conditions which bite into people's lives.
Take the ridicule of Calvert-Lewin on these pages, his mental health struggle, whatever. Other players too: Aaron Lennon… going back to Gary Speed.
Compassion or ridicule… I doubt some would know the difference.
Oh, and as a footnote, I am currently looking after a family member who ended up getting sectioned in the UK, released and left to his own devices and spiralled down even worse with no support. We got him out here and helping him deal with life.
My thanks go to the brilliant posts on here from those who know what they are talking about, from those who have first-hand knowledge... because it helps me understand that life isn't black and white.
217 Posted 16/07/2023 at 12:34:38
"Indeed, it seems from what people have said that denial and a resolute refusal to accept the fundamental underlying issues, or their inhibiting effect on mental capacity to do the job, are highly symptomatic of the condition itself. "
In my experience of dealing with family members and friends with addiction problems they DO KNOW they have a problem, are ashamed of it and try to hide it as much as possible.
They know full well what they're doing.
218 Posted 16/07/2023 at 12:43:18
Even now, after help and care it's still hard to accept, so the reality has to be that not everyone is aware of the reason or even the cause of mental illness.
219 Posted 16/07/2023 at 13:05:09
I see both sides: his very unfortunate and traumatic childhood which has left scars; on the other side, there are tens of thousands of people that have and are suffering with mental health due to all types of scenarios. The difference is Dele, if he wishes, can seek and receive the very best help.
We did a deal with Spurs and it is Everton who have a duty of care for the wellbeing of him, he is our player. I suspect there will be no renegotiation over the terms of the transfer even though it makes sense.
Football is his escape, so let us all hope he can enjoy the sport that has been so fruitful for him.
Those with doubts regards the interview (and I include myself) are entitled to have an opinion with respect.
There is always an agenda, is what I would say.
220 Posted 16/07/2023 at 13:05:10
Meanwhile, a bi-polar friend who was having a great time not taking his medication (and getting into lots of trouble) decided to take the ultimate way out.
221 Posted 16/07/2023 at 14:42:45
Six weeks of therapy followed by an interview with this nitwit, and 'corner turned'? I can't see it. I can think of precious few counsellors who would declare 'I think he's ready now for the viral interview with Gary Neville' as part of a proper course of rehabilitation from mental trauma.
Six weeks? Six years is nothing in the land of therapy. He's badly advised if he is advised at all, but I think in a few weeks time he will already be regretting his decision to 'get it all off his chest'.
222 Posted 16/07/2023 at 14:47:09
The tell-all interview that goes into deeply personal issues is very risky. If I had a serious mental health condition, the last people I would tell would be my employers, but he did that and then doubled down by telling the entire world.
It might make a compelling narrative, but I don't think the risk is worth taking.
223 Posted 16/07/2023 at 16:09:42
What I will emphasize is that your recurrent assertions that Dele deliberately defrauded Everton are not "indisputable fact" but rather your opinion, and it's an opinion that I consider to be contemptuous of the young man. I see zero evidence of any such lack of integrity in anything Dele told Neville.
On the contrary, I find his new openness about these horrendous circumstances and his outspoken willingness to accept responsibility to be a testament to Dele's character, not a stain upon it.
You are entitled to stand by your comments. I stand by the words I used to describe them.
224 Posted 16/07/2023 at 16:18:07
I think he needs time away now to get better. I doubt that the fairytale ending of swift redemption in an Everton shirt is coming soon, but he's made a start.
I would guess that some days he will regret coming out with this; sympathy is often short-lived. But I think he did the right thing. Now he needs a private recovery, and it's a long bumpy road ahead.
225 Posted 16/07/2023 at 16:43:53
Am I well? Life has been a series of health problems and some may say I've been unlucky but from getting the ability to walk and play sport having been born with club feet to being diagnosed with a head and neck cancer some 16 years ago, I think I've been unusually lucky, slow horses and not enough lotto numbers aside, but that is the top and bottom of it.
Now stop me if you've heard of my hip and eyesight as my memory isn't what it used to be, I think. Cheers!
226 Posted 16/07/2023 at 16:46:28
It is more likely that Everton did not ask him the question about mental health, as it is not common for employers to do so. This is due to a) prevalence – 40% of office workers reported suffering from a mental health issue during a study in July 2021; b) duty of care – employers increasingly see it as their responsibility to support employees when they are suffering from mental health issues rather than try to prove they were suffering them at the time of hiring.
Occasionally, companies do require a drug and alcohol test but the presence of sleeping pill medication would not be seen as a fail. In short, Dele did nothing wrong in what he declared/did not declare when we hired him.
227 Posted 16/07/2023 at 16:54:58
And keep debating.
Your views on Everton and football give great insight.
Take care and god bless.
Forever. I can't wait for the season to start. Starting at Wigan next week.
The wife is on holiday with my son's girlfriend. He's away overseas.
It's me and the dogs talking about Everton this week.
228 Posted 16/07/2023 at 17:00:55
230 Posted 16/07/2023 at 18:46:55
What does the money have anything to do with any of us? I don't know if Dele Alli will ever be the same player he was but if he is 70% of that player, he's better than anyone else in the squad.
Why can't people see that it will be a great deal for Everton and most of all a great deal for Dele? Scousers have always looked after our own so, when you sign for this great club, you're one of us.
231 Posted 16/07/2023 at 21:06:55
I never realised I had a choice. I was told. It just was.
I was Everton from as early as I can remember.
It's probably why I am the idiot I am to this day as I approach my 52nd year come September. I share a birthday with Neville Southall.
I can't get enough of them no matter what they put me through.
More than life itself as the line from the song goes.
I wish they would give me and countless others something back.
They will.
And we'll keep going until they do. I will.
232 Posted 16/07/2023 at 21:56:53
Andy, let's hope so. You just never know with footy. He's got more talent in his left toe than the rest of our team, and I don't think it's an exaggeration to say he kept us up in that final game last year. I can't say the omens look good at the moment but who knows what is going to happen.
233 Posted 17/07/2023 at 06:14:39
The deal agreed was not in the best interests of the player and still isn't. The fact that there appears to have been no attempt to address this really does raise questions of the parties involved and their motivations.
It will all come out in the wash when Dele Alli writes his book.
234 Posted 17/07/2023 at 08:40:04
It occurred to me that Dele Alli's problems are a recurring spiral: Loss of form, pressure, more substance abuse. Till finally collapse.
I suppose a football club is like everywhere else that does not have a substance abuse problem. They just don't know about it.
235 Posted 17/07/2023 at 17:45:40
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1 Posted 13/07/2023 at 08:15:24