In pursuit of happiness

A bit like my relationship with my beloved - I'm as brave as feck criticsing her, until she draws into sight. And when she then sidles up to me...

After watching nearly smash my knee caps on the living room floor as I threw myself to the ground in anguish at some of our decision-making, he casually glanced at me and said, "Football is supposed to be fun, something you enjoy".

Now, this was only said in jest but it really hit home with me as I've been thinking about it all week.

How much fun do we actually get from supporting this club? I'm 41, I was 13 the last time we won a trophy. We haven't even qualified for Europe in 6 years and our football has generally been garbage.

Where's the fun? Quite simply, there isn't any. We're addicts, Everton is the drug that cannot be kicked. Ever!

I've even agreed to travel all the way down to Wolves, paying for tickets and train fares, even though I know how poor we are. I'm even looking forward to it. I can't help myself.

I was on my smoke break the other day and I was thinking about how much I think about Everton... every single day without fail. And not just a fleeting thought either, I can easily spend hours over a day thinking about this piss-poor yet unequalled club of ours.

One day, all this will pay off and I'll see us win a major trophy again... I've earned it. We all have.

It will happen, Lee.

The dark days of the late Gordon Lee seasons. The stumbling start of Howard Kendall's era, and then the dark winter of 1983 before doing a U-turn.

The decades of having expectation beaten out of us.

Anything is possible.

You've earned it. It will happen once we get off this rollercoaster.

The fun comes from the wins we do have, especially the unexpected wins; the games where we rescue a draw from the jaws of defeat.

The fun comes from the anticipation and hope that those moments, as rare as they might be, actually inspire.

Without the lows, there'd be no highs.

And the fun comes from seeing the other lot pull a metaphorical hamstring.

The joy of seeing Pickford save a penalty or Keane score a worldly or Calvert-Lewin score the winner that keeps us up are all part of what makes it worthwhile.

As Danny posts above, our day will come again but there may be a lot of enjoyable pain before then, ha ha.

Now, I just wanna learn to go with the flow. If we go down, I'll still be there. We rise from the flames I'll be there…

The thing that scares me the most is this fight again next season. Whatever happens, the summer needs to bring real change in boardroom and pitch.

But I was thinking about my mate who has just witnessed his team steamroller the Championship, playing some great football along the way. Now that's FUN!

We're living off scraps and have been for a long, long time.

Danny, I know we will, mate. It just feels a long way off right now.

Our pleasures are so much more simple. There's always a silver lining.

Lee- I saw my brother in law today, he admitted when Dyche was sacked he was worried because an American owner had come in and making too many changes, and or course the debt. He says he can't believe how much he was wrong and how Alan Pace is getting it right. Vincent Kompany as manger (who expected that), and now the NFL connection will give them publicity. He then asked me do I think Dyche will keep Everton up? I said to him.......Errr

The guts and dedication of Evertonians in the face of adversity these past 30-odd years is a force of human nature which in football can't be eclipsed.

It's the realisation of how important the club is, more so in these tough years past and in the next few weeks. The pleasant stenches of Goodison Park and the surrounding streets on match day and in the surrounding pubs and chippies; St Luke's and the memorabilia, the intensity in the pub after a win, a great win, and the knowledge and forthright honesty to discuss openly the difficult games lost by a mile or just bad luck.

But, as many Evertonians of an older vintage, and some of a fine old vintage, blessed to have seen success, and of the younger generations whose dedication is inspirational, the memories are priceless.

One day, this club will find a better place and hopefully the journey to a better place starts on Monday teatime at Brighton.

UTFTs!

It's funny seeing Bill Bryson's perspective because I've been on the other side of the coin. Here the Kansas City Chiefs NFL fans claim they are passionate as opposed to the baseball and football teams.

I've been to their games among the “hardcore faithful” and realized their “passion” is actually just shouting and swearing not because you're emotionally involved but because they get paralyticly drunk. In other words they shout and swear at each other or about Biden, Trump whatever. It is nothing to do with our type of as Barry calls it “mental illness” Danny's “love” or Paul's “religion.” All three descriptions are appropriate.

For myself I'd say I'm probably more in the Barry group of seeing as a mental illness I have. I remember as a kid throwing a tantrum when we lost a derby and one of my parents' friend who was an ornithologist saying to me “why do you spend all you're time watching grown men kick around a bag of wind?”

And I replied “Why do you spend all your time watching flying bags of wind covered in feathers that crap on people?” I got in trouble for being rude.

Although the ornithologist (actually a very nice man) conceded I had a point. We all have our illogical obsessions whether for love, worship or mental illness!

Nobody outside Everton, and I mean nobody, is going to feel bad if we drop. They will be laughing their heads off. We really don't deserve to stay up, bloated on gangster cash, run by scumbags and scoundrels, but I can't help myself.

The feeling we are cursed grows with every year. And now we're riding into battle for the last few games with that donkey at centre back. God help us.

I am like most supporters – followed Everton after my first game and that was in 1954 and I got in when the gates opened 20 minutes before the end. I was hooked right away by the atmosphere and the humor from the crowd. I don't remember the score but the bug was implanted.

I am 82 now so have gone through more highs and lows than a number of supporters but the passion is still there and, as my wife says, if she had a heart attack she would have to wait until half-time before I would phone for an ambulance (just kidding I think).

Most successful teams are supported with supporters just who pick winning teams. Everton are supported by people who are born blue-blooded but don't know it until their first game.

We are all disappointed by what is happening at the club and it is a shame that the true supporters are not being heard. But the one thing that can bring a smile on our faces is we were here before these clowns, and most of you will be here after they have gone.

There is another thing you can rely on, the ones before a game with a smile on their faces cracking the jokes is an Everton Supporter, who continue to support their team in the good and bad times.

Off to bed – my medication is kicking in.

OK, I've cancelled Tuesday's Doctor's appointment as we play Monday night but the Doctor will be there in a couple of weeks and I'm less certain that Everton will be. In my 70's and get up early owing to time difference as much as anything and in a self imposed news blackout I'll watch the replay. Whatever happened to 3PM Saturday, even lunchtime Sunday was almost acceptable and am I one of the few that remember early season Tuesday night home games?

If the worst was to happen I don't know how to find coverage of Championship games or if all games are covered. And what about all the hard work Optus have put in rectifying the same transmission problem those 24 times. Not to mention how a full night's sleep might affect the Doctor's income.

You see, there's more to this than meets the eye and I won't be stopped by a Pickford hip, a Coleman's knee or less saliva than a good striker's first on pitch gob.

Life as we know it, oh, and how's Bill's health? Oh dear, what a shame, never mind. Addiction my foot!

If we ever get a proper team, wow (I only remember seeing us in '90s really, having been born in 1979 so too young to remember the '80s heydays).

In terms of excitement, we've had little for years, but we used to always have exciting players in past, whether Gravesen, Arteta, Kanchelskis and Richarlison.

Unfortunately, likeability is even in short supply with players in this side, let alone trying to find a hero. Pickford produced heroics last season and will likely continue to do so these last four games – just like he did against Leicester.

As for outfield players, I guess McNeil since Dyche came in can at least be commended for his efforts and balls to at least try and produce.

In the '60s, almost without exception (Inter Milan), we played our evening league and cup replay games on a Tuesday and Liverpool on Wednesdays. They had more European games than us but their league games were always on Wednesday.

Football can get you past that and Everton actually does. And when it does all else is temporarily forgotten until the next surprise. We all love the sure thing for bragging rights and security of identity but it is the ride that is magical.

Half of my love for Everton probably comes from beating the odds and occasionally spoiling the bourgeois dreams of better funded clubs. I have always hoped for better but always knew the odds. Sometimes the uncertainty is overwhelming but it is the essence of this love we feel.

There are two factors which have made this a less enjoyable season. Firstly, for me, the VAR has diluted the whole experience of celebrating a goal, as you know there's a chance that someone's armpit hair was offside during the build-up. And secondly, we're just not very good at scoring goals.

Across the top 5 divisions in English football, only 3 teams have a worse goals-per-game ratio than us. So if celebrating the ball hitting the old onion bag is something you love to do, then you'd be better off supporting literally any team other than Everton, Forest Green Rovers, Gillingham or Yeovil Town.

That really is fucking grim, isn't it!

I wish it wasn't if I'm perfectly honest with you, it's cost me so much time and energy with little return in my 45 years. However, when you love something you stick with it. Managing expectations is important as an Evertonian, expectations are the birthplace of disappointments.

I'm anxious about the game, we simply have to get something from it. I agree with a couple of posters who say we have to go for it, sitting back against these lot with Keane in defence is asking for trouble. 4-5-1 and fight for your lives. COYB.

The position the club is in now wasn’t really a lot better then when I first began supporting the club but I loved football as much as Everton then and it was sheer magic for me to see the footballers of the forties.

The special players Tommy Lawton and Joe Mercer had left the club, TG Jones would soon follow them and it was a mostly mediocre teams that I followed with just two semi final appearances for excitement with both ending in defeat, a promotion season followed in the third year of second division football and they made a meal of that keeping us waiting until the last game of the season on a joyous night in Oldham.

I along with thousands of other Toffeenoses waited another nine years before that magical game versus Fulham saw us presented with the title- - brilliant.

Then came three more league titles, three FA cup wins, a sensational night in Rotterdam but only the good times we had under “ Thingy” came after those very welcome years.

We have to take the good with the bad and I’ve met some brilliant people who I met as a kid and right through the years up to the present day who followed the Blues like me and are all part of being an Everton fan, we’ve had a lot more downs than ups but I wouldn’t want to support any other club but Everton, let’s see what these four games have in store for us finishing the season, I hope they mean another “ up “ to go along with other relegation battles we’ve had to endure, these relegation battles are the good times Billy Boy is talking about, thanks a bunch “ Chairman Bill”.

Like a marriage, we are with this club that we love unreservedly, no matter what. Because its all we have ever known.

Unlike those who claim to and issue statements in their media driven world.

Unbelievable.